All Comments on 'Olympus University'

You do not get a Dr. with a masters degree. Makes the character seem like an idiot from the start.

in agreement with anon you become a dr with a doctorate or phd not a masters

This story line has a great deal of potential. There are several places that should have been proof read for punctuation/spelling. Severl errors in word usage and word tense. Learn to proof you work. Start at the bottom, and work to the top. One sentence at a time.

About the Phd that was more of a brain error on my part. I was working on this application while writing the story. Like I said I do most of my writing at night so some things do slip by me.

Man, it's clear that this is a fantasy from this sentence:" Plus Caltech has a killer athletics department so that's a bonus."

Caltech has one of the weakest athletics programs in NCAA Division 3, the NCAA's lowest division..

Great potential with this one look forward to more. Not many errors as I could see and at least they didn't distract from the story.

Maybe you were thinking of Stanford.

i was thinking you might send him to stanford since it is on the left coast and away from the family. if he doesnt tell abby how he feels then she may not be there when he gets back from school.

enough said tyvm

I like the Idea of a off the Beaten Path School Mom or Dad could have Acquaintences at Stanford. But Caltech fits the bill close but Not on mom or dads watch list.

If he wasn't going to MIT because it's a tech school, then he probably wouldn't consider Caltech, another tech school. Berekley or Stanford would probably been more likely.

Anyways, nice lay down of the story. I'd read more when you get around to this story again.

At the end of the first page it says the 5 people right there but there are six (five in the family and abigail).

Loved the story and can't wait for the continuation of any of your series because I love them all!

Keep it up.

This is good but u need to finish red tiger

The idea reminds me of Percy Jackson and the lightning thief. Still good story looking forward to seeing where it goes

Get an editor. Throw up a post on the forums. There are online workshops who will help for free and anonymously. If an editor just isn't working try reading it aloud to yourself. Another suggestion is to finish it and then leave it for a few hours and then edit it.

That being said great ideas! Keep up the good work! Also if you plan on stopping please let us know so I won't keep coming back and checking for new stories every few days, XD. Pet peeve of mine... But please don't stop

I like all the stories that you have recently started writing and I think that you have made a good groundwork for them all. The only thing that I can think of to criticize you on would be that maybe you're making your characters slightly overpowered, if that makes any sense. Then again, I'm not really bothered by it and I don't know if others will be. Anyway, good work and I hope that you can keep the ball rolling with all of these series at once.

Will be interesting to see where it leads

I am happy you decided to go ahead and post this, as it seems to be the beginning of a really interesting and entertaining story ;-)

I will be favoriting both this story and you as an author.... you have an excellent hand for character development and plot. I definitely want to see where you go with this.

I hope you have not given up on this. I would and I'm sure others would like to see this story continue

Need to keep going with your stories!!! Once i started reading one i had to read the rest.! Please continue with the ones you have started and take them to completion.

I love you. no homo.

Astor or Anston?

This is the second of your stories I have started that seems to have died on the vine.

I can handle spelling and grammar errors. I don't mind some factual errors. I can even put up with holes in plots.

But I HATE not knowing how something come out at the end. First the incomplete 'A Genie for Jake' and now this. I may have to stop reading your work as it leaves me too frustrated at the end.

That would be a shame because the stories are very good. What there is of them.

Please continue

come on that is all? you r a tease. .... lol please continue with it. thaks

one hell of a story.

Fagitaboutit it's overrated. We need some completed stories! Get your nose back to the grindstone. Please?

Oxford and Cambridge has separate entrance exams. There is no apply with grades system.

You cannot study at London University, it is a federation of Universities under the London label. You study at a College of London University, Imperial etc.

I'm glad you did publish it. I haven't read Adventures of Zeke Jordan but now I have a reason to.

I wish you'd gone ahead and waited to get an editor. As it stands, is has potential, but that's about it. Problems start early-- his stepmother's family goes all the way back to "the Medicis and Windsors of Britain"? Really? The Medici family was Italian and not English, and the Windsor line, while it is English, only goes back to 1917!

In the same paragraph, you tell us that the three Astor daughters grew up like "three pees in a pod". Unless you want this story classified as "golden showers", you might want to change that to 'three peas in a pod', as I don't think you meant the girls were urinating on each other.

You have grammatical errors (many) and factual errors as well, all of which keep this from being the good story it is capable of being. Your imagination seems to have placed an order your technical skills can't fulfill. An editor could help you find and fix the errors, and give you a story as good as many of the indie books on Amazon/Kindle. [I particularly enjoyed the word play where you turned Olympia, Washington into Olympus, Washington.]

This story has potential. I like the start. Continue please.

Great story so far. Please continue...

Very interesting start to this story. But after more than 10 years, unfortunately, I don't think it's going to be continued.

There's been nothing new from TNWTBOD since 11/08/2015. I think Literotica lost him... :(