All Comments on 'Omega Pride Ch. 08'

... please, please find a better editor. You dropped pronouns all through the story and missing words in a sentence and missing letters in a word; it makes the story very hard to read. I've sometimes wondered if English is your first language because you've had some of these issues in previous chapters but this chapter was particularly rough. It's such a great story though and I always look look forward to the next chapter, if you can clean up the grammar a bit more this story would be fantastic!

I personally don't think it's the worst chapter. It wasn't that hard to read. Only grammar freaks sit there and act like they couldn't focus. I love your story and I'm so glad you're back. Continue doing your best and I must thank you for sharing your vision with us. We should all feel privileged to be able to read your story for free because you hold no obligation to us to continue it.

I agree that this was my least favourite chapter so far. The grammar wasn't that bad but sometimes the wording seemed...awkward. Also I can't understand the contradictory hierarchy. Some of the Delaney wolves were so angry with Delphi when she was resisting Wyatt's advances and now they are upset with/jealous of her for accepting him. People are calling her Mrs Delaney but still referring to as a weak omega... I just feel like we are going around in circles here.

you're stories are getting better and better, and i'm glad you've started these up again.

i was really sad when i read from 1-6 then couldn't continue!

personally, i don't care about slight grammar errors, god knows i've made some myself!

i can gloss over them if the story's good enough, and your's definetly is.

but PLEASE carry on with this!

don't drop it again, or i might have to kill you. ;)

keep writing, i'll be waiting for hte next one!

k_k

So happy you returned to continue this story, its such a favourite of mine yay to you :)) .. cant wait for next chapter and like the last commentor i dont give a shit about grammer mistakes im intelligent enough to work it out like im sure most ppl are.. 'H5!'

Dont stop writing as i love your storyline ... i read it just fine and loved it ... more please

Thank you for coming back to this story! I can't wait for Delphi to show everyone how strong she is! Those betas are bitches!

OOHHH the plot thickens! its getting deep! LOVE THIS!

I'm glad Delphi is getting stronger and I'm glad she has formed an alpha bond with the rest of her pack.

I was going to wait until the next chapter, but I feel that I have to say this now to clear up something. My editor has actually edited many stories on this site, many I'm sure you guys enjoy as well. The words seem a bit awkward because that is my writing style; writing how people talk and how the emotions flow to me, not proper grammar that we find it most works. I understand that this can and probably has frustrated many, but please, if it irritates you guys so much, you don't have to read this. I do thank you for reading, but this is my story, and I'm posting them because I want to share it with others, not because I have to. Thank you.

C.C

Love your story can't wait for you to continue

Yup, yup. I like the plot and the characters. Um, I don't know about the others but I can read it just fine. Yes, there are some mistakes, but everyone makes them. Besides, I have that amazing ability to mentally edit them so as not to disrupt the flow. Yup, yup. Plus, your story really captivates me so yeah, I could care less, lols. I am biased liket that. And I agree, we don't speak with perfect grammar and so, those mistakes just make her characters more real ^-^

continue...to hell with the grammar police! I'm sure someone thought "literotica" was misspelled when they first came across it...so boo hoo!

OAN, I can't wait, oh yea, and glad to see you're back!

I cannot wait for your next chapter! Please continue writing!

Canis_crazy, who are you talking to when they speak the way you have written here? I'm sorry but if they're actually talking like that they're just too lazy to speak properly and so are you and your editor if thats the way to want to have it. I kept hoping it would improve, but you've lost this reader.

you are weaving a compelling story and I hope you will continue it. You have a great imagination--something that can't be taught in grammar books!

At the Anon, I understand. Thank you for reading up to this point.

Errors be damned. This is an compelling story.It's much better than many grammatically correct stories on this site.The premise is different from the normal ware wolf stories. Good job, and thank you for sharing this with us, I appreciate it.

Delphi seems to be hearing the thoughts of the pack members. Isn't that an alpha trait, part of the alpha bond to the pack? Really, this is a messed up pack! They can't seem to make up their minds! And I don't think that 3 teens attacking one makes her weak. It just makes them bullies. Somewhere inside of her is an alpha waiting to burst loose!

Sorry, but to me Delphi is just annoying. I think she's a somewhat unlikable character. She should grow some backbone.

First off I could like to say that I am loving this story! It has a fantastic story line and it is different to other were stories that I have read on here. However there are times in your story where I have a hard time following what the characters are saying. I believe it has mostly to do with your constant comma splices. In poetry commas are used as a pause or a break but in prose it is a slight variation on the idea or thought. If you keep that in mind it might help a bit. The constant use of commas gives your story a stop and go kind of feel which can be confusing to the reader. Also you claim you like to type as how characters would speak however some of your characters are supposedly centuries old, and considering the time periods they have lived through would they not have proper grammar when in a calm state?

With all of that is said, I still find your story highly enjoyable! Please keep writing. I look forward to what you have in store for Delphi, and her strange lapses in memory!

I can't wait for them to go back there!! I hope there will be some survivors left!! That would be so interesting.

I agree with one of the other posters: Delphi's constant confusion and spineless behavior is MOST annoying, doing little to endear me as a reader to her as a character. There is some foreshadowing, but more and more pointed, foreshadowing is needed to provide a better sense of who Delphi REALLY was or who she will become, to maintain reader interest. Story's pacing is just too slow.

She needs to hurry up and realize her true strengths!

Still poor editing. Lots of grammar mistakes.

Still looking forward to reading more :0)

Nicole

I love this story but..the blankness in her memorys and her spinelessness is just takeing far to long and is takeing away from the joy of the story.

Delphi's symptoms are common to telepaths just coming into full possession of their abilities, but I've never heard of werewolves with significant magical or psionic ability before. At first I thought it might be something only alphas could do in your interpretation, but apparently not. How interesting.

I have to say that this chapter frustrated me alot. I can't stand that they aren't developing their relationship. They've had sex and that is all. They don't talk about anything of consequence until this conversation. She is going through something major but doesn't think it is worth mentioning it to him as they try to figure out things about her and her pack? Is it a lack of trust in him? Why isn't he clued in to the fact that his pack can't stand her and that this puts her in possible danger? I wonder why her wolf gets angry about the things the wolves say and yet doesn't stand up for them? Is she so convinced she's an omega that she won't let any strength show? Why is she so damn set on being an omega? Why is she not willing to get some balls and climb the ranks if she is capable of it? I mean, she really is not showing the signs of an alpha's mate. see what I mean, it left me with so many questions. Another thing i don't get: he worries she'll leave and knows she can't defend herself and yet he closes their bond? He's an alpha so no matter what he was reading i don't believe he can't just not project the info.

I also don't know if it is that it is late, but i also found the conversation very confusing. The whole thing was hard to understand. I understand she's drawing a connection between the packs that disappeared and hers, but it wasn't clear what she meant with all those years, etc. Also, I'm wondering why that race is considered dangerous, esp if some are just human? What do they have against wolves? I really want to now more about Keric too.

I have loved this story and think it has been well done and interesting. This is the first chapter that didn't sit well and left me frustrated, with questions and annoyed at her as a character.

I am not trying to attack you. Just point out how I saw it ...and again, I like the story and will be happy when another chapter comes out so maybe we will see a change in her and her mating and also get answers to some other questions.

Can't wait for the next update! Your writing is fantastic and the story line is so intriguing and intense. Keep up the great work!

Glad you got back to this story. It was a long wait. The grammer does not bother me. I love the idea of this story with an Alpha mated to an Omega (supposedly) but I hate how slow this is moving. I normally give you a 5, but I can only do 3 this time.Here are my biggest gripes:)

1. At first I felt sorry for Delphi, but her growth is taking to long. She is being annoying now. Whenever her wolf does try to come forth and put someone in their place she gets all wimpy. The "I am only a Omega" litany is wearing thin.

2. This pack is whack. I don't care if she is not the Alpha Madame, she is Wyatt's mate so she deserves some respect.

3. Why would Wyatt not hear Delphi's call or feel her fear/anxiety, no matter what he was doing. Someone else had to save her?

Please post the next chapter soon and if possible move the time table up so she has more backbone. This is your story and I am only making an observation.

this chapter has left me confused about several things i'm confused as to what i'm confused about....and yeah, delphi's character is taking too long to grow, if she is intended to grow....your storyline, while interesting, is a lot different from what i normally know in stories involving werewolves...i am most definitely NOT dissing your take on it...as i said it is interesting, but i really hope you can cohesively explain your purview a lot better...i dunno if it's because english is a second language for you that's why you are having a bit of difficulty conveying your thoughts? (i'm assuming your are french speaking)...and pls i don't mean to offend if you're not...i am just getting increasingly confused with what you have written...but i still would like to keep on reading...maybe the next chapter/s might be more illuminating for me

CC - I understand your point about writing conversation the way you perceive people actually speak, but your descriptions are confusing and poorly worded. So why are you - or atleast your editor - not correcting that? It creates problems in the readability to the point that people are just skimming through your stories. I would think that since you, as a writer, are taking the time to put words on a page, you would want all those words read. Don't you think they are all important and should have meaning, giving your story life? If not - then carry on.

Hello all:

Just letting you all know that the CC shouldn't be blamed for the grammar errors. We did actually catch all or most of them in the editing process, but there was a technical glitch and the wrong version got submitted. So I ask that you all ignore the grammar errors for this chapter.

Thanks,

MythOFreak

love the story line - and can't wait to see what happens next! Don't keep us waiting too long!

Hey great story !!!! For us non-USA readers when will spring break be ??

Great story can't wait to see if there more

that already happened. for most U.S. universities summer break is coming up. It's in about 4-6 weeks.

Sorry the wait. It was intended to be only at then, but Life has its way with things. ^ ^ I posted it on my profile already, but it currently is being edited, so it should be up in another week. Thanks guys.

C.C

Great job so far. How many chapters do you think there will be?

I'm thinking somewhere between 10 or 7 after the next one. Depends on if I merge chapters or not. Only time will tell.

C.C

And I love it! It must continue. It has a different twist from the others. Please continue the story.

I love this story, I think its brilliant and I really want to see how it ends. Please finish it!

Comon post the other chapters

So does anyone know about the next chapter

cannd on 04/07/12

At the start I understand , it is maybe a bit normal to be so submissive and scared, but at this stage it is starting to be irritating. She constantly whines, there is no show of her ability in truth, just a few raise voices, I thought she was finally going to show some backbone and beat the hell out of beatrix but again, she is reduced to this pathetic whining creature, unsure and no backbone. It kind of make me want to slap her a few times for being so wimpy at this point. Do not get me wrong, I do much love your stories so far, it will make it more interesting if she is to show some reactions, some ability other than read mind,an event, something that would make her doubt her rank as an omega, and be more assertive at last. I doubt it will lessen the main plot, that is the mystery surrounding her identity, it may enhance it actually.

the author does have a life you know! And for all the grammar Nazis not everyone's college major is English, i for one stick to biology. i think this story is good so far one of the top ten, i have read very few that were so intriguing. this reader appreciates that you have a life and are still able to write this! and editing does take time.

So glad I gave this story another shot! I'm loving the development of this story, the pack politics, Delphi's mysterious ability, and this new adventure for her and Wyatt. Having minored in history, I'm super excited to see where that element goes, but the teacher in me goes a little crazy with grammar and spelling. I just can't turn it off. I'm also smart enough to know that plot, structure and dialogue are more important than grammar and spelling, and you're doing a spectacular job there. As long as you keep the story in the same tense, I can ignore the rest and continue to enjoy the journey. Kudos to you.

good story line thus far, grammatical errors with homophones being interchanged throughout the story. It is a good read, yet; when will she stop being such a coward that never stands with backbone until she gets beyond angry. I really like the history and background throughout their story.

She needs to stop running from her true Alpha lineage.

more please...more! more! more!! i so enjoy this story.

I really love love love your story

I'm one for more of a story and plot but you have perfectly mixed haveing a plot and having sexual content

I also like you mixing in another language

But really the things I love the most is how you depict werewolves and how they get mates it is truly wonderful

Well I'm done with my rambling along