All Comments on 'One Trick Penny Ch. 05'

Then have Penny get Quinn out of prostitution and into a legitimate healthy life style. That would really piss off some LW marriage haters, especially you know who. But you can call her Johnnie, or you can call her Ronnie, or you can call her fucked up, or you can call her dumb slut, or you can . . .

Rating being held until you reveal the full plot. I suspect this chapter was supposed to mark a turning point for Penny? It reads more like a teaser instead of an installment furthering the plot. Whatever Penny does next, parceling the story out in dribs and drabs is diluting the drama and interest. I am curious to see how you present this story, but starting to lose interest in your characters or what happens to them. Is that what you want? If for some reason your story stopped with this chapter I would not be left wondering, Oh my gosh, what happened next? This is reading like a documentary of what Penny did, when and where she did it. But drama, suspense, curiosity? Not so much.

We know she wants to enliven the sex in her marriage. Becoming disappointed with her husband's lack of inventiveness sounds like a desire to cheat, looking for an excuse. You don't show where she is sharing her desires and sexual frustration with her husband, nor his failure to respond to her interests. It does seem preposterous for the wife to want more varied and active sex than her husband. But if that's who she married, she should deal with it. What if the husband decides he wants a woman with different size breasts, or ten years younger? If she proceeds to act in ways that endanger her marriage then she comes off as just one more stupid slut. And this tale become just one more unnecessarily long stupid slut story. That would be too bad.

But Yonnie would love it.

But that doesn't mean she will. Still a good story but I wonder how well the story will end. They don't really communicate and too many fairy tale beginnings become nightmare endings filled with hurt, sorrow and intense anger.

Still, I forward to more.

I actually thought this was the best chapter so far! The tease of her "research" causing her to actually become what she is pretending to be is very exciting. Keep up the good work. Can't wait to read of her next research session!

Didn't anyone notice in the first chapter that she had hundreds of hooks but only one John? I'll be disappointed if that changes. As soon as they go outside of the marriage the fantasy as is stated will end, not that there couldn't be a follow-up series.

Back to 3*, because this part was different and with some imagination...Now I believe the next parts will be about the other whore's life...let's wait and see...

A big pat on the back. Enjoyed the hell out of it. Be interesting to see where you're going to take it.

Outside money is involved. The husband is doomed. High marks until now. No vote from me.

We've established what she is now what's left of the marriage hangs on haggling on price.

.....inevitable crash into the rapidly approaching ground.....nothing to do but sit and watch the end race toward us, as we watch, frozen, horrified through the windshield.

But getting there has been a well presented, carefully planned process.

Congratulations, well done. Thanks for the ride.

Too bad it won't end better.

Husband wants to be a pimp. Luckily, he married a whore.