All Comments on 'Open Your Eyes Ch. 03-04'

Stopping this at the beginning of their introduction is a horrible place to leave your readers hanging. You should, at the very least, have let them say a proper hello.

There's my main complain. You have drawn us a picture of some interesting characters and set the stage, but drew the curtain far too quickly. If you were looking for your audience to want more, well done, but perhaps too frustratingly slowly. Reading a story broken up into such short pieces as this is kind of like watching a video of an action/fight scene lit only by slowly blinking strobe lights. There's a lot happening but we only get too-short glimpses of it. So, in short, MORE please - and in bigger chunks! In truth, your chapters don't need the separation they provide - at all.

Waiting for more, please.

I know that I jumped the gun a bit with publishing the first part of the story

I found an editor that is willing to help me out and he has also brought up these concerns as well.

I am trying my best to get longer posts and publish a more polished end product. Thanks for the feedback and hopefully the next post will come soon!

- D.D.