All Comments on 'Orbital Academy 01'

Worth a sequel or more ...

A nice first effort.... I would like to see more of this story... If you're only using It as a framework for a sexual tale, maybe a second chapter... If you can develop the charectors and the sci-fi/ academy parts of the story as welll, I would be interested in seeing a multi chapter tale... Thought you set up the main charectors in a way that made me interested in the academy/sci-fi part of the story... You set up the sexual part of the story welll, enough description but didn't drag it out... I'll look forward to seeing if you do more with this... I think for a good story, that the balance of the sexual as welll as the lateral story lines blend better in a story that it's at least a little longer... I appreciated your effort

My only gripe is her pause in the middle of a training exercise to masturbate. As a flight instructor, she should not do anything to take her attention off of the 'Rooks'. However other writers have made the same error, so do not take it to heart and this is fantasy. I will read more to see what you do with these characters. 4 stars forthe problem I commented on.

What does Jane look like?

great writing style and nice start, i'm hooked!

Don't take this wrong, but I had a good chuckle. Very good story. A little on the short side though. Glad to see there's more.