All Comments on 'Overheard'

Get a copy reader and a spell checker dumbo

brilliant story over heard . love reading it. i can see more parts

still to come . the writing was very hot and erotic . a born writer im sure.

do lets have more parts of this brilliant first story.

ok let me gets this straight. he tells his friend he wants to fuck his stepmom then the friend comes over and fucks her and he his ok with that? fuck that and his friendship if you cant trust him with that then you couldnt trust him with anything else.

That's what I was thinking he friend is not loyal. I would've fucked James up if I was Jeff. You don't fuck my mom unless I give you the okay & you definitely don't do it before me. Especially since I told you I'm trying to fuck her.

Premise fun, idea exciting, grammar and such sort of detracted. Agree with getting someone to proof before you push send. I know I checked my story about 25 times and still missed some simple elementary errors. Keep it up though! It was a fun read. I still gave it a good score!

You really need an English grammar class. Examples: Too instead of to, fine instead of find. Mom instead of mom. The errors made me skip paragraphs to see if it got any better but you continued to the end.

Very well developed story line ... only gave it a 4 because of the typos & grammar, but you will improve I am sure. Your plot is very hot and I look forward to the next installment. You go girl ...

Especially one who won't use the screen name.

Submissions get better each time. Once the excitement of writing erotic stories slows, you can see the minor errors.

Great first, keep going and smile. 8-b

Lee

Hope you can find someone to edit and correct spelling and grammar faults. Not something you can do on your own work. Storyline is fine but typos very distracting.

To a new sexy couple. All mother stepson should be so lucky.

Must really have lots of diets in place of brain to write such a shitty story.

Suggest you read through your stories and correct spelling, punctuation and grammar

prior to submission. That would make for a much better story.

It is a shame none of the characters respects anyone. There is no intimacy, romance, chemistry or sensitivity to anyone's emotional well being nor needs. The characters have no self-awareness, ego or id. There is no plot except who has sex with who.