All Comments on 'Paradise'

WONDERFUL HUMOR GREAT SEX GOOD STORY DON'T MAKE IT YOUR ONLY SUBMISSION

at Paradise, and a unique moment when husband and wife screw only each other!

CONGRATULATIONS. You have spun a marvelous yarn. I rated it a five because they didn't have four and a half and I couldn't see marking it down to four because of my little pet peeves. One, you misuse the verbs lie and lay. Second, the stomach is part of the digestive system, not something we lie on, That part of the anatomy is called the belly. Third your characters are flat. Even Serge and Zoe are presented without history or emotional description. Their interaction, even intercourse, lacks feeling. But its a good read and an enjoyable fantasy. THANKS FOR SHARING