by Imaginative1A
I saw myself through the entire story. Wish I had such a guy to accompany me to the play and "enjoy" him as much as she did......great
Great job of a smooth transition from casual lunch to sex in the evening. Very rare that is pulled off gracefully.
Alwaystaboo
The only reason I kept reading is because I couldn't find another that wasn't written in first person.
I don't mean to be harsh but did you even read it before you submitted it? So many (many, many, many, many) grammatical errors & misspellings. Many places there are letters left out (ex: of instead of off) or you used he instead of her.
Having to figure out what you're trying to say takes us out of the moment & ruins it.
Decent concept though.
Such an promising storyline, but the awful writing killed whatever interest the story had.