All Comments on 'Peter, Prue Ch. 01'

...like one of them (or both) really is cheating or it isn't Prue's friend sending the messages.

This reads like the play, Waiting for Gadot . . . the main character waits and waits but Gadot never arrives. In other words, we, as human beings have the capacity to fuck-up almost everything.

As is the case with everything you've ever written.

I'll wait the end to rate...Until now two people that don't speak with each other and clear things and so are wronged by a machiavellian mind...However very well written...

It's as beautiful, as it is uninhabitable. The story deserves a higher rating then currently owns.

Very well written, as usual with this author. A couple of dunderheads with terrible communication skills. And at least one friend (Julia) that appears to be the snake in the Garden of Eden. Hope you have posted the next chapter. Can't wait to see where this goes. Thanks for the great read. Well deserving of a "5".

Then again, your usual standard is lofty. It just seemed too contrived that each suspects the other of cheating this intensely based on an anonymous text. It's not like there is a history of infidelity between them which might have made it more credible.

I'll check out the subsequent chapters to see where it goes.

has given us no reason whatsoever to care what happens to her hapless characters. Either they are stupid or hopelessly unintelligent, naive or dumbly credulous, unimaginative or simply unconscious; Whatever they are or for whatever reasons, this reader, at least, cannot care about either of the pair because there is no way either, I can imagine, is capable of surviving in the world they inhabit regardless of any unwanted evil interference from a cellphone message. If there is a moral to this story it is that there ought to be a literacy test before people are allowed to receive text messages.

is there really anybody who thinks your protagonists are acting normally? Tomorrow cows will fly.

What is it with spouses that have their imaginations run hither and yon without confronting the spouse and talking the issue out? Does anyone really act like this? Sure communicaiton is a big issue in lots of relationships, but a fresh one with the bloom not off the rose, how could they believe the anonymous text?

The lack of believability in the reactions of the two main characters destroys the story for me, doesnt make it horrible or poorly written, but just makes it another blah, blah blah.

As someone said, surprising from this author, who's stuff is usually pretty tight.

I want to beat Julia's face in for being so evil, but at the same time i want to beat Peter and Prues faces in for being so deeply moronic.

Beautiful writing, awful characters.

to fail

no point to continue

no way for a positive outcome.

I am not masochistic. I will not continue.

I read this painfully slow story to the end, hoping that they would talk, anyway I wont be reading anymore if it is more of the same. Its a shame because the writer has plenty of ability.

For a couple who are allegedly in love, where is the communication between them. Please make it better in your next chapter.

and pete almost seems to realize that he had already been looking for any excuse to dump her.

Plots that are based on lack of or miscommunication are stupid. I got only to the point where the couple greet each other at home, and it becomes apparent that neither is going to reveal the text messages they each received. Oh God, not another plot based on, well I thought this and I thought you thought that but I didn't say anything because I wasn't sure what to think and then you started acting odd which confirmed what I thought but didn't really know and still did not ask, seeming to confirm my worst fears, which fears kept me from confronting you and then we both started acting out of character which added to my suspicions and, gee, isn't this just the most dramatic and subtle and clever mystery?

Glad you've got time to try spinning a yarn out of cotton candy, all fluff and innuendo, and no substance. Its just too stupid and boring to plod along watching another deaf and dumb couple torch their relationship, because they don't know enough about being adults to actually just say, "I got the strangest text message today. Does this make any sense to you?" What if the text message had said something like, "He has cancer," or "She's pregnant." Do we really think they would keep that to themselves? The whole premise is that, all it takes is a blind vague text, and suddenly they doubt their spouse. And if that's all it takes, then there really was no relationship there to begin with, and no story worth reading. Trying to understand the mistakes of the stupid does not make very interesting reading. Hope all your other readers enjoy this Snipe hunt.

Awesome to see a story from one of my favorites. You are a gifted writer. I am not sure the plot device you have chosen is convincing. They both receive the same text and can't muster the will to discuss it. Talk about making a mountain out of a mole hill. But even though these two were stubborn and jealously jumped to unfounded conclusions, the instigator could not have known that his/her ploy would have that effect. What a stroke of luck!

No interest, no feelings for the people in your story. Snooze

If you wrote telephone books, I'd read them. Fortunately, you don't.

This story has been the most painful and frustrating for me, and I don't know why. Nothing similar has really happened to me, but it feels very familiar for some reason. I think a lot of people in relationships really do act this way at times.

rj

It's high time the young couple learned the ABC of marital life.

I hope you're taking this in that direction. Just a learning experience for both, nothing ugly .They're a bit stupid but they do love each other. At least Prue did show some Prudence . She tried to communicate.

I'm really surprised by some of the reader's reactions . If only they knew all the stupid reasons for which couples get divorced.

And as for the writing, this has Angique written all over it. 'AS' is amongst the most trusted brands on Lit. :-)

I agree with LSD, this is highly underrated.

An obvious 5. Thanks for sharing.

bad.

but I should have expected it. quitting here.

I suppose retardiquemoronique wouldn't have sounded quite as conceited, even if it would have described this air-headed clueless housewife nonsense more accurately.

Stupid anons- go piss on someone else's work. This story is frustrating and touching. Without failures to communicate we'd have no soap operas, of course. With a devious meddler, it is even worse. I will keep reading and try to stay positive. I'm one of those "love conquers all" kind of people. Not a bitter anon...

No-one would behave like that especially after she told him she got the same message. He is a real pathetic jerk. All plot devices for the sake of the story...

I have said this before several times and I know it gets me into trouble but the fact is that angiquesophie sexual identity or perspective simply prevents her from developing writing any dialogue about husbands or straight men with any sense of realism. Let me show you how she fucks this up in the story

The entire story is that revolves around a key aspect of back in chapter 1 -something which is impossible to explain it and that makes no sense. When the husband found out in chapter 1 that he had received the same text message as the wife ... (in their first conversation) it would only be narutral abd OBVIOUS for the husband say " hey got the same text message !! Let me show you"

Instead for reasons which are completely inexplicable the husband becomes a woman.. develops a pussy and lies around the sofa moaning and crying like a little lesbian bitch.

If that event bizarre reaction does not happen the entire story falls apart. In order to make the story viable this deranged author has to come up with a forced and contrived plot twist which is beyond all reason and shows have truly detached angiquesophie is from reality

But wait this gets worse. Even if the husband does not tell his wife that he got a similar anonymous text message ...the husband actually KNOWS that they both got text messages that are anonymous.

Not only does he not tell the wife about his anonymous text message but his response when the wife triesd to reached out to him was --- " leave me alone ...I need some time".

This is just lesbianism run amok. No straight man with this knowledge that he and his wife have both the received anonymous text messages would react this way. And no straight man would ever sulk and complaining they need time and one be left alone.

This is HIV in a Joseph Heller nutshell.

Major Major’s father was a sober God-fearing man whose idea of a good joke was to lie about his age..., a God-fearing, freedom-loving, law-abiding rugged individualist . He advocated thrift and hard work and disapproved of loose women who turned him down.

it is not possible to have four people who can hold down a job and be this stupid. All any one had to do was ring one and ask them where are you let's talk. No matter how well a story is written it is read for education or entertainment. I was not entertained. Rubbish # 1. TK

The writing style is good but these four characters are less believable and less entertaining than a foursome of exSealDeltaGB super people.

Ouch.

????

Trying to figure out what is wrong with the husband... The idea she would say she got a ln anymous text message about him cheating to their him if the train makes no sense. How would she even think to come up with that? And... Easy to verify. Have her show him...