All Comments on 'Pool Boy Ch. 04'

well adding noah just ruined this for me

Much worse story

It's a group post, I'm assuming h the author has some women readers also so this would be more enjoyable for them. To each his own, Im not a fan of DP myself but that doesn't mean it wasn't still a good read. Keep up the good work, lookin forward to chapter 5.

Noah is a great addition. I do think there should be some female on male analingus like you had in Hot Summer Night Chapter 10.

Hunter keeps his dark hair cut short, but I'd like to imagine he has the beginnings of a bit of chest hair, which which appear a bit bleached by the sun, for the masculine muscular chest. Especially on a boy/young man of 19, a bit of chest hair, the beginnings in the middle of the chest, at the shirt collar line, and/or the treasure trail is a real turn-on for others!

The latest installment seemed forced, contrived, stale and unoriginal. And those were its positive aspects!!!! Too bad, such promise unfulfilled!!!! One more like this and I am going to willingly and anxiously forgo the remaining five episodes!!!!

Master Bedroom (master bedroom)

the closest of Alexis' nipples (nearer) (Alexis's) (4)

top pallet (palate)

lathed (laved) (2)

flagellated (licked)

my -(own) orgasm (WHO ELSE COULD EXPLODE AN ORGASM FROM HIS LOINS???? THE TOOTH FAIRY????) 4)

Fuck (fuck) (4)

FIRED FORWARD and then back. Her hips pulled back and then FIRED FORWARD (13 WORDS)

She took her tit that was in her mouth with her (A HIGHLY INFORMATIVE SENTENCE. WITHOUT THIS STARTLING REVELATION, I MAY HAVE THOUGHT THAT SHE LEFT HER TIT BEHIND!?!?!?!?)

guard house waved her through (guardhouse) (HOW MANY ARMS DOES A GUARDHOUSE HAVE I CAN NEVER REMEMBER????)

sleep-walked (sleepwalked)

eye-candy dangling on their arm (arm candy) (I PREFER THAT TO ARM CANDY DANGLING FROM MY EYE!!!!)

step-sister (stepsister)

step-father (stepfather)

flagellate (lick)

opened HER MOUTH to show me all the pearly white sperm in HER MOUTH (AND HERE I AM THINKING THAT IT WAS IN HER SHOE!!!! THANKS FOR THE CLARIFICATION!!!!)

next door to Olivia's.I pulled into Olivia's driveway a few minutes past 2:00 PM. I made a couple trips from the van to the pool (HE WAS NEXT DOOR SO HE LOADED UP HIS TRUCK, ONCE HE COMPLETED THE FIRST POOL, THE DROVE TO THE NEXT-DOOR HOUSE ANDUNLOADED HIS VAN FOR A SECOND TIME???? HARDLY AN EFFECTIVE USE OF HIS TIME, IS IT????)

blabber-mouths (blabbermouths)

flash-backs (flashbacks)

sun screen (sunscreen) (2)

sun bronzed (sun-bronzed)

six foot (six-foot)

setup (set up)

blood curdling (bloodcurdling)

G-Spot (G-spot)

finger-tip (fingertip) (2)

cannon-balled (cannonballed)

red-head (redhead)

role playing (role-playing)

tongue tied (tongue-tied)

planked himself (plunked)

full staff (full-staff)

MY COCK and as her hands wrapped around MY COCK (IT IS COMPLETELY UNCLEAR IF HIS COCK IS IN ANY WAY INVOLVED HERE!?!?!?!?)

pogo-ing (pogoing)

finger fucking (finger-fucking)

You (you)

g-spot (G-spot) (4)

taught as a bow-string (taut) (bowstring)

half dozen (half-dozen)

high pitched screech (high-pitched) (WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU HEARD A LOW-PITCHED SCREECH????)

seethed air threw (through)

Aluminum (aluminum)

got in made (it)

I mean what ass wipe reads a story and then list all the things he can find wrong? I gave this a 5 for making this annony fool do his English homework. All we need now is for him to find Waldo!!!!

What are you, a frustrated, under appreciated English teacher! I can find an error in EVERY story on this website (sorry - Website)! This is EROTIC WRITING!!!!!! You will not find a New York Best Seller on this site!!!!!!! Dunce head!!!!!! PLEASE - DO NOT READ ANY MORE OF THIS STORY!!!!! Even many of your 'corrections' are not correct! Many are your taste in writing or sentence construction versus the author's. Go to another Website and complain there!!!!!!

Ain't Mr Anonymous a trimmer 😆

He loves your stories, absolutely loves them; as do I.

To spend all that time and energy pulling it apart line by line and getting all excited about this and that, tells me the clown spends more time reading your stories than anyone else on the planet. 😂

I think, secretly, he's your biggest fan.

It really is pretty pathetic, that with his consummate grammatical skills, he doesn't put his name to his diahorreah. Like mate, you should be publishing tomes on grammar. Get your name up in lights. Be the legend you're destined to be.

Pffffffttttt.

What a tosser.

Had to go with a 1 on this set. Didn’t care for him sharing his harem with another guy nor his harem sharing him with others outside the group. No emotional attachment to them. Still a little pitiful that he did nothing to stop those attacks against the two women nor to Emma.