All Comments on 'Pursuit of Happiness 09'

very enjoyable chapter well written and very exciting can not wait for the next one

its just that there is an abrupt change in the narrative that is at times, hard to grasp

This chapter gave me a thrill. Either I read it wrong, or I thought Thomas would betray them for a second. lol THANKS FOR PROVING ME WRONG!!!

Looking forward to the next chapter, with gusto!

I hope that Thomas is exposed as the fraud he is and that Michael doesn't get away with this!

Two pages is not enough put more in it's annoying because I get into the story it's VERY VERY VERY frustrating with only two pages per story!

This is becoming a great story. I'm not sure how many more you have waiting to be approved but you may want to insert some sort of visual break between parts. I've noticed it on most of the series but when you had a break thought you caught it and were correcting it. It just get confusing for a brief second when you jump from one scene into another totally different.

Also consider going back to the first ones and cleaning them up and send in the edits to lit.

what a cunning ruse by thomas. He really turned his shit round. I cant wait for when alpha ross gets his ass kicked

Im mad that Lyssa got the rabbit shit kicked out of her but Im thrilled they were rescued!!! Great chapter cant wait for the next!!!

This is starting to be a great story to read. Cannot wait to see what happens next.

I'm glad that Lyssa and Jo have been rescued.

I hope Michael gets his just desserts as well.

Still would love to see some sort of separation indicator used when jumping from scene, location, event or person.

The fact that so, so many have commented on and requested this and nothing has changed, and the fact that the previous story never had this problem makes me wonder.

TilHeCums

Next chapter please

I can't wait until the next Chapter. I'm so Hope Jo & Nate get together and Michael ... Well the devil always gets his due...lmao

Oh don't bother to edit it just post it. You are still not listening to your fans when we ask that you make it clearer when the scenes and pov changes and at one point I think you had Joanne driving the car to get away from Jason but at the moment I don't care I just want the rest.

Make more o__e

I hope you are not going to make us wait to long for the next chapter! You have posted the rest so quickly and now you are making us wait for ages how cruel.

This is an extremely well written story. Please continue the series.

now please

an excellent chapter. You leave me with questions to ponder over as I await the next chapter. I still love the pace in which you are posting and hope it continues.

Come on!! Please upload soon!!

amazing story you have here. it sucks that Thomas is still such a dick in this scenario but he will get what's coming to him, I'm sure. Update soon.

THIS IS INTENSE. I LOVE EVERY PART OF IT....IT IS LIKE WHEN ONE REACHES A CLIMAX AND JUST KEEPS FLOATING IN EUPHORIA.......................LOVE YOUR WRITING!!!!!!!!!!!!

see that is why you should train your females to fight just as well as the men if they could fight then they might not have got taken so easy and i hope there is a very long and violent death for that little spoiled punk of a were

I think Thomas was just "acting" about wanting sex with Lyssa - he clearly saw that's what Alan and other dude were thinking, and wanted to roll with it until more help arrived. In my eyes, Thomas did what he thought was best to protect Lyssa.

Wow - great action. Michael and his goons deserve the most horrific punishment imaginable.

luv2read2

Seriously??

Thomas was simply trying to get the idiots to let their guard down so he could get close to Lyssa.

great read! :-)

Looks like people got carried away reading this and didn’t realise that Thomas was helping 🙄

Great storyline.

Tess (uk)