All Comments on 'Ragged Point: Death on the Rocks'

when one knows the difference between the fact and the fiction. TK U MLJ LV NV

I asked for a mystery, and you delivered beyond my expectations. This is an instant classic. Thank you so much, Randi.

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so very well written. Points were made that need to be heeded in all facets of life. Lies by omission are still damning lies, any reservations a spouse has about the actions or demeanor of the other spouse have merit or should have merit with the offending spouse and sometimes a drunk asshole falling off of a cliff can be funny.

Thanks for the wonderful story and for sharing your great talent with us.

Pappy

If you’re writing this for TV, it’s too by the numbers clean. I’m not trying to rewrite your story but it lacked suspense. One suggestion would be to have the wife be implicated, have the note left behind, and have the wife completely in the dark about what happened. She’d be frantic and that could generate some emotional heat between the couple. At the end, the widow would offer him the job as you describe. Then the secret would be the phone call from the widow to him. Then it has a layer of a shared secret that neither will really acknowledge because she doesn’t want to know.

"The 'formula' for these stories seems to dictate that I recite our history together" - That may be the "formula" for these stories, but unless there is something in that history that has bearing on the story I, for one, don't need it! If they're married today, presumably they met, dated and got married! It DOES work here, a particularly liked the part with her audition.

Pre-nup - She WAS foolish! I can see a pre-nup to protect him from the usual "take the husband to the cleaners" when the wife cheats scenario, but for her to get nothing even if HE cheats, or even irreconcilable differences is way too much!

Why do the wives, even after being advised by their husbands (and blowing off their concerns!), not catch on when the pussy-hound makes his move? Why not tell Linda that Barbara KNOWS he cheats, but can't divorce him?

The idea of these "brain-storming" sessions is new to Les?

Her husband warned her about this, and Les isn't even being seductive about it, laying it all out there for all to see, and she doesn't slap his face? He even tells her he's done this before, after she told her husband, "Oh, Les isn't like that!"

If she wants to "pay her dues on her back," that's fine - IF she was single! But she's married, she's forcing HIM to pay her dues, too!

Why is he so worried? The only person who has a clue that he was even there is Barbara, and she probably won't tell, especially if he can get to her and tell her what happened. I know she said that she loved him, but I'm still surprised at how upset she is. The good thing for him is that she probably feels guilty about sending him up there, so won't say anything!

Evidence tampering? That's only if they know he took it!

"You didn't mention that the 'staff meetings' you were going to were just you and Les," - I thought that when she confessed she told him everything.

One could call this story a mystery without a crime.😳

Thanks for a fun read. Really enjoyed the Joe & Eva characters, too.

I'm glad to see a wife stand up to a predator (finally!) instead of falling off of her round heels onto her back.... ;-)

Thanks again for your continuing contributions here, and especially for this one on MMT day.

But i did notice it . And even re-read to make sure.

i minor plot error.

Thankfully it didnt do anything to damage a great story.

She told her husband that Barbara dropped her off after she drove home from the Ragged Point Resort. &quot;The Bimmer pulled into the driveway and she got out of the passenger side.&quot;

A S&W Model 19 is a .357 magnum (which can fire a .38 cartridge) a minor point I know, but it totally breaks up the flow of an otherwise excellent story.

Fascinating view of police work??? The wife pleases because the end she avoided the semen but she should have left Les talking to himself at the table. Yeah I know he might fire her. She should at least go to the Ladies and advise her husband.....

Really liked this one, with drama and good flow. The only nitpick i have is that you changed point of view several times, from 3rd to first (The husband). It didn't really ruin anything, just made gear shifting of my brain. Thanks for sharing!

Well written and a good plot (hook).

Really enjoyed it.

Top ratings from me.

Well Done. You are also a very good story teller, Besides blackrandi

Anticlimactic after the asshole goes over the cliff. The whole cop investigation was kind of pointless, or at least very melodramatic. There was no murder, there was no adultery, just an arrangement between the parties to make the occasion of his death less of a nuisance. In the end even the cops went along with it. And having the female cop deciding to play with a work colleague made her seem a lot less intelligent than her other character traits would indicate.

A nice clean straight forward story of mild interest, like most television programs.

A theme that has been done a number of times but you added some nice twists and turns. It was fun reading an area which I am familiar with. I especially enjoyed your making the “good” husband a crime show writer. You did your homework. Top marks, thank you.

I thought the husband forgiving his wife immediately was far to premature. The agreement to spend the night with her boss and the unreported one on one lunches were far to significant for that. Any husband with a backbone would have been mortified with such behaviour. This needs to be brought out in the story.

This is not the first time sbrooks103x has criticised the background history of the couple as being irrelevant. This allows the author to explain to the reader the nature of the relationship and also enables the reader to be invested in both the characters and the story. I just assume sbrooks prefers comics to novels - his problem, so just ignore him.

Glad to see you back. Liked this story enough to give it 5 stars. But I admit, that while anonymous, I am an unabashed fan.

I enjoyed the characters, the storyline and the relationships between the various characters.

Loved Les's internal dialog on why he is a predator.

I even liked the surly cop.

Thanks for writing all your great stories.(See? Unabashed fan)

Good story with just a couple spelling glitches. You can use HTML encoding to add a blank line. Use the tag

“Less than”br”greater than”

Tooooooooo much background. Could not read. Love. Slap hapy papy #9

"Ouch! Why did you do that? I was complementing you!"

[snigger]

I guess since they were having sex, they probably did "complement" each other. And right after, they probably "complimented" each other too. ;)

Sorry, couldn't resist.

S&W Model 19 is a .357 Magnum. Oops.

Olfrog14x

5* Superior storytelling! Write on!

Lunches and omitted lies. Agreed even if changed mind later adultery.

Doesn't have to be physical.

Mental emotional and subterfuge all counts.

Tad to long. 5☆☆☆☆☆

A good story and very enjoyable. Thanks!!

Wow! Great story, well written. I’ve read almost every author where Randi supported and/ or edited. She makes a lot of writers look good. I might try to team up with her for my mainstream romance novels. I suppose I am a sentimental ham, being a Ventura native, having catered a lot of food to some of Hollywood’s sleaziest Jews (think starts with an R and ends with a nick), then having my company ship me up to Cal central coast. Ragged point was one of my customers (food sales biz) for several years and I’m pretty friendly with the owner. I can say with 100% accuracy that restaurant in Cambria was fictional or I’d have known about it, but to complete the irony, I now live in Coeur d’Alene ID. Coincidence? Don’t tell Sgt Joe! Well done!!

"Smith & Wesson Model 19 .38 Police Special", nope, Model 19 is a .357 Magnum. Could have been a Model 10 Military & Police, or maybe a Model 15 Combat Masterpiece (adjustable sight). Minor nit, good story.

You write superlatively

The whole adultery issue aside anyone who allows their spouse to cheat in them especially a Guy is a cuckold. She cheated whether it was the intention or the act she cheated should of thrown both of them off the cliff.

good story, interesting, well written but just a page or 2 too long.

Loved it, second story in 24 hours I have read were the wife decides to say NO, things are looking up 5*

Awesome story! Really good read As I read it, if Art hadn't showed up it might have become a forcible rape. You know, like that guy now in prison.

One or two gun-oriented minor errors. Well, the first, not so small, involves Art's S&W revolver. When a revolver is unloaded, the chambers in the cylinder are visibly empty from the front, where you're pointing it. Visibly. Empty. Bad move. If it's loaded you can see the bullets. The other, actually possibly not an error at all, is that cops are stereotypically all Glock fans. You might, maybe, conceivably find one with a SIG, IMHO. Not impossible.

Loved it. One of your best. Hope to see some new material in the future.

The hat tip to Murphy's Law - nice.

In my experience, the scummiest of Hollywood types is only exceeded by New York City folks living in Florida. Not to say that the rest of L.A. isn't as 'user' oriented of a mindset as the movers and shakers.

Believable characters; cheating can be 'attractive' until... and there ARE folks who cross the line mentally, but not physically. For the ones that say they wanted the almost-wayward wife punished - OK, the same day that you castrate yourselves for chipping off to Miss December in the bathroom because you wife won't give you head. Hypocrites.

Put it on my list of fav's. Way short of sexual fillers but the plot is intriguing, almost Twilight Zone'ish.

Chopinesque comments that the empty chambers in the revolver would tell the appointed victim that there were no rounds in the gun. Might be true for ole Clint but I'd be waaay too busy crapping my pants to notice a thing like that

A very entertaining story,a winner in every category that makes it a success for a reader like myself..5 stars..JZK..

Don’t put parenthetical statements inside of dialogs; unless you are going to have the character say “parenthetically”. You also had a couple instant POV changes and having the same character speak two paragraphs in a row is confusing. Either contain it in one paragraph or insert a sentence in between to give the reader a heads up they should look to see who is speaking and not assume it wasn’t the last person speaking and jump past the citation. Other than those nits it was a very good story.