All Comments on 'Reading the Defense'

so this will be a series like that was short - great start though!

That was a good start nice character development but a tad bit short can't wait to read what happens next.

Don't lose the momentum. A good, real sports story is always a winner in my book. Great debut. If you keep this up, you'll join the ranks of MugsyB and, if you say your prayers and eat your Wheaties, SA Penn Lady the Hockey Goddess.

Now your technicals need work. You can write, no question; you can tell the story hot and sweet. But I'm sending you quibbles, purely technical ones, because technicals can put off the reader. Offside and delay-of-game penalties kill coaches. They shouldn't happen, but a few always do, so keeping them to the barest minimum is every coach's dream. Same with technicals.

Quibbles follow via "Send Feedback." Great start!

I can hear the El clicking in the background. Once cracked a windshield on an outer drive pothole, standard winter driving.

Thank you for your spectacular contribution. We look forward to rest of your story. Take your time, set your own pace, work your own chapters and in sizes that you are comfortable with, we will gladly wait for your caliber of story.

I am not into sports at all but I love the hockey stories Mugsy and PennLady write. So maybe I'll love a football story just as much? I'll definitely be reading the next chapter.

an excellent start, and already has its hooks in a number of us. You have my private contact with my Hinsdale interest, as well as Clarendon Hills (her elemenmtary school).

Love the story so far and can't wait to read more of it. Please put out more soon.

and worthy of a 5!

Looking forward to where the next chapter leads. I think it will be getting hotter.

Great start , lousy ending

Inane dialog of little interest. People aren't really that boring are they?