by PennLady
You wrote another great chapter in this series. This chapter shows the relationship with Brody and Ryan growing positively. I was happy to see that you get rid of Jason from the band. I can hardly wait to see what you do in the next chapter.
Another wonderful chapter. Love how their relationship is progressing.
Love the series as I do almost all of your writings. Keep it up.
For all the stress the Ryan harbors, she has found a way to "relax" with Brody. Their budding relationship feels natural and therapeutic. Oh, and good riddance to Jason!
Keep up the great work.
I can hardly wait for Brody to put her parents in their place when they meet and her dad makes the mistake of dissing on Ryan. You have written the characters into a nice romance and they fit so nicely together, just lovely in fact.
Oh, and you gave me a line of narrative that will echo through my mind all of the Christmas season, when he asked his brother if he couldn't take their children back because they lost the receipt.
In your stories they are very real, very likeable. Brody seems to be maturing into a fine boyfriend without being too needy.
I don't know what it's going to take, or if it's even possible, to wake up Ryan's parents.
They're dumber than a passel of pucks!
Good, meaty chapter. Thanks for posting.
I have a soft spot in my heart for Brody and Ryan. I've loved all your characters, but these two are becoming some of my favs. Can't wait to see what Christmas brings for them and us!
I'm loving the development of this story! You have got me on the edge of my seat wondering what's gonna happen next. I love it! Oh, by the way, thank you for FINALLY letting them hook up physically! I know I'm such a slut for saying that, but I've been waiting patiently for them to hook up. Can't wait for the next chapter!
i am loving how the story is prgressing . I hope the Brody can help her with her parents and maybe he can make her parents see just how much of an ass they're being i can not wait for your next chapter
I love all your stories, just not this one. Where is the chemistry, passion, romance? These two are dull and boring. There's no longing or anticipation. The sex is mechanical, like they're neighbors and fuck buddies using each other for sex. Brody was a womanizer, where are all his alpha male qualities? Ryan's a musician, she should be emotional and passionate. There's so much potential for this couple to be hotter than all of the others...I'm just not feeling it. :(
You're still my favorite PennLady!
I like this one a lot and I look forward to Brody calling her family on how they treat her.
Looking forward to the next chapter!
PennLady, you are one of my favourite writers on Lit, but having said that, I'm finding this one a little boring. I was really pulling for a story for Brody, but this just doesn't feel like your normal standard, I will continue to read it though even if only to see Brody call Ryan's family out on the way they treat her.
I don't believe everything can have the same formula, although I can understand the sentiment when authors build up expectations.
I actually like these characters. I feel that there is a lot more to Ryan's character and it's nice to have a character that is independent and not all about the boy, all the time. People are multi-faceted, but sometimes we do get "boring", by having our attentions distracted or focused elsewhere.
Looking forward to the installment. :)
i don't actually have ANY critisism for you, your writing's incredible!
All i'll say is... could you possibly make the sex scenes longer?
they're at most, a paragraph of ACTUAL sex.
i'm not dissing or anything, but perhaps longer? please?
I've read your writing before but missed this story somehow. I love it, love that it is about hockey and about love, you write so well. Really well done, go you, you are giving us a gift with this writing and I hope that you keep it up. I'm a hockey dad, roller, I know, it's the lame ass hockey but it is hockey, I've coached it, it is hockey. I played ice pick up, I learned way more from coaching than I ever learned playing, I see the game now.
I love that you highlight the tension between sports and music and architecture. I was not the dad in this story, I always told my boys "if it is not fun, we don't do it". There was never the energy you have to go pro, my kids are good, way better than me, but not pros. If this story is how you lived your life, I'm sorry, that dad is a shithead. You should be supported for what you want to do, I get the energy that no support for stupid shit, but Ryan is clearly working hard and on a path, that is not stupid stuff.
Great story, thank you!
Is it me, or is everyone hoping she gets to be a superstar eclipsing any success her brothers or father have had? I remember an interview with Dido where she was very well known, had performed all around the world and was selling a lot of music, but her father didn’t accept she was successful until he heard one of her songs pre-game at a football match, families eh?