All Comments on 'Riddle of the Copper Coin'

I thoroughly enjoyed reading your story. Thank you for sharing it with us.

Your stories are divine tendrils that wrap around my body and brain and do not let go.

Superb story! This is the first time I have been moved to send a comment concerning a story.

Thanks so much for sharing this story.

If you wish to quit your day job and write, you certainly certainly should!

5 stars is just not enough

A wondrous tale. Beautifully told. Thank you

Exquisite.

I'm not normally one of FF pairings, but this was beautifully written and a wonderful read. Bravo.

As expected from the author, of course. :D But however much I enjoyed the Stringed Instrument series, this one hit me quite a bit harder. Such a pleasant read. Comforting at points, fraught at others, and tantalizing at the end! Arabian Nights-style fiction was a favorite of mine when I was a child, so I really enjoy this updated-for-adults version (so to speak!) I've read it three times, now, and it's been better with each pass.

Like a previous commentor said, five stars isn't enough!

Thanks for extolling the very best of Muslim culture. You have given us a window into a world that has become so distressingly distorted.

You are a masterful wordsmith and storyteller.

Another beautifully written story from you. And again an intimation right at the top which I as usual unfortunately did not grasp, but with such delight discovered revealled at the end. Thank you. For the story, and for the care with which you craft this one and all your others.

This was so very well written, and so lovingly interwoven.

Coming from a country where muslims are considered enemies, but 1001 is well loved, I find it interesting to note my changing reaction over reading the story. From being wary of Rafi, to saying it doesnt matter, to saying it does matter and things are more complicated, and putting myself in place of Penny and what would I have done.

So, a huge thank you, for the pleasure and for the intellectual debate.

I really love the way you write.

Shachar

This is possibly the sweetest story on literotica. It was beautifully written and I thoroughly enjoyed every part, even though I'm not into FF. You did a wonderful job of emulating the style of 1001 Nights too.

I came her from clicking on the link in your sig. I'm not into FF stories, but greatly enjoyed this. I loved the exotic story that paralleled the real story. It did have the feel of the Arabian Nights. Well done.

A lovely story, lovely in its imagination, its poetry, its generosity of spirit, its patience. That was the most exotic aspect of the story for me, that Rafi so lovingly cared for her friend over all those thousand days, and that Penny waited so patiently. You are a wonderful writer. Thanks.

I very rarely leave comments, much less publicly, but this is one of my favourite stories. As a huge fan of 'Tales from 1001 Nights', I was thrilled at the beautiful parallels.

Though a FF pairing, the sex/gender of the characters didn't make any difference; it could have very well been a FM or MM pairing and it still would have worked.

I love the way you treated Islam - not as an exotic Other or as a religion of hate - but as a complex worldview with barriers like all others.

It is erotica at its finest.

Here are some of my thoughts after reading your story twice in a space of a couple of months. Apologies for delaying your request, but I wasn't interested in reading any fiction. Life/shit happened, blah, blah, blah, and some more things you wouldn't be interested in.

Without further ado, I'll state a few points that caught my eye while reading your story. Most of it is really nitpicking and I won't comment on grammar as you're far more qualified than I am. Also, everythiung is from my POV. Keep that salt ready.

> The beginning of your story is a monologue rush. I know you're trying to set up the background for everything, but this style doesn't well for some readers, especially me. I'd rather prefer authors fleshing out characters through scenes and some dialogue. That'd certainly lead to a longer story, but I think the end result's worth it. It certainly has more pace and definitely more interesting than a monotonous monologue.

> Humour. Well, it's my only weakness while critiquing a story. While yours isn't a slapstick comedy, it's certainly well-placed and gives your story a light feel. I liked that. While the chemistry between Penny and Rafi feels rushed, the humour makes it a comfortable one. The tone is light, and honestly, I welcome the change from my usual reads.

> The writing style of your story - it's great. One major fuck-up authors do unwittingly while writing a story with arabic theme is the writing style. It's just the way a non-english speaker would narrate a story. You get full marks for that.

> Your riddles and rhymes - OMFG! I had a braingasm just by reading those. It was very, very, very well-crafted. A masterpiece, really. Any more and I'll end up looking like a dabbling fool. Just for the record, it's the best I've read in quite sometime. Gives me the nostalgic feeling, like when I read the actual Arabian Nights long ago.

> The only problem I felt was the underdeveloped relationship between Rafi and Penny. It felt kinda rushed to me. Heck, even Adib and Makaaram's story felt better than Penny's own. Maybe it's because you didn't give enough obstacles for them to come over together. Maybe it's because I'm comparing Penny's Romance to Adib's and the former falls way short.

I feel it's a combination of both. It's just that Adib's story is so fantastic and imaginative as compared to Penny's. It screams "look at me, I'm better". Rather than complementing Penny's side of the tale, Arabian Nights completely steals the thunder.

> As for the erotic content....I didn't find this to be a stroker or particularly erotic. Just a great story that culminates in some very descriptive sex. That's it. I guess it might've worked for some but I can't say the same for myself. I guess Adib's story was too engrossing for me to care about the erotic content.

My honest vote would be a four star (I didn't actually vote because I don't want to bring down your story's ratings). It's a very good read, but it wasn't the best. I hope you don't take that as a negative comment, because I rarely, if ever, have a five star for something.

Thanks for the effort you put into this. I know the verses must've sucked some life out of you. I write a few from time to time, so I know what's it like. ;)

Cheers!

Bard

Thanks Bard! For what it's worth, I generally agree with your assessment of the strengths and weaknesses of this one. Longer response via PM.

This story is easily a favorite now. I absolutely love your characters-especially Adiba. The coolest element of this story was the fact that it was literally two stories in one, and it was SOOOO cleverly done. Adiba's (and Makaarim's) riddles were perfect and I also loved how easily it intertwined with the story of Penny and Rafi.

I didn't think a story from Literotica could have me so on the edge of my seat as this one did. It got to the point where I was speed reading 2x more than my usual pace! I almost want to say I wish it was longer, but no. It was done and paced perfectly I wouldn't want anymore or any less- that's how perfect the ending was. :)

As a side note: I want to commend you on your ability to completely change tone/voice when switching between the stories. I'm sure it's easier said than done, and you made it look extremely easy. Rafi's story had the air of an old tale passed down from generations- a story of cleverness, kindness, love and faith. You embodied that type of story beautifully!

Thank you so much for writing this. :)~

Persephonie

Thx so much for your effort to entertain us. I'm so very glad I randomly managed to find this story, I will undoubtedly read it again and again. ...I'm surprised we nvr got to hear about Rafi's childhood. Oh well, great stuff, Thx again!

Goddammit. I try to make online accounts only when I really need to, and now I'm seriously considering making one here. Wonderful story. I would agree with the Bard in saying the final smut wasn't as compelling as the rest, but I think that's inevitable as the story is more based around satisfying the mind than the body.

I love your stories and this one was my favourite to date. So well written and thoughtfully so. You built two worlds in one story, and used the one with the Jinn to help the blossoming relationship in the other, excellent work ( I've read stories when the author dosent even manage to build one) . To those who said the intimate scenes were not as explicit as they wished for, I would like to say that you don't always need explicit sex scenes in a love story to get the story across. To me it was perfect, a beautiful love story, actually two beautiful love stories . Thank you

Maybe it held greater appeal for me partly because it struck such a nostalgic chord, but I thought this was a very clever story. It's probably my favorite of what you've written, and I already quite liked the two serial chapter stories. While I admittedly don't have any experience editing or critiquing, I feel like this was executed really well and was a bit more advanced (in a literary sense) than much of the more fluffy/smutty stories I read on this site (which I don't mean to demean, as I enjoy them quite well regardless of their literary merit). Thanks for a great story.

-JC

When I really enjoy a story, I sometimes launch into extended expressions of flowery praise, including detailed mention of those things I found impressive and moving. I'm sorry I can't do that here. I have none of that ready, even though this work of art richly merits the highest plaudits.

I'm left without words. Beyond a simple and sincere "Thank you", I find myself speechless.

Thoroughly loved this story. Thank you!

I'm so glad to be revisiting my favorite authors - somehow I missed seeing this story when it was freshly written.

This story is utterly (and literally, actually) fantastic! As I have no taken for writing, please realize my paltry efforts to write a review can't possibly do this story justice - suffice to say that the characters are beautiful written, the tale spun around them magical, and in the end I'm left feeling completely satisfied - yet hoping to be whisked away into another world of your telling.

I read this yesterday, and was mightily impressed. You’ve had some wonderful comments, and I tried to come up with something as wonderful, but as I still can’t I’ll just say that I loved all of it. I loved the fairy tale and I absolutely loved this:

“ It felt childish and yet delightful, like the moment when I realised that being an adult meant I could buy myself ice cream any time I wanted.”

I know that feeling exactly. Except it was potato chips.

A beautiful story within a story - the princess brides?

Thanks for suggesting that I read this, Bramblethorn. :)

Having recently rediscovered your oeuvre, this is the second story I decided to check out today. And while I really liked Counting to Eleven, I loved this one. Really impressed by how well you made your mise-en-abyme premise work, and even more impressed by that 1001-nights-style fairy tale you crafted there, poetry very much included. That must have, as Rafi hints half way through, been an incredible amount of work, and I'm happy to report it turned out delightful!

I checked this out because of several mentions in one of your series. I’m so glad I did! Your writing is so good in everything I’ve read of yours. I will save a few of the other independent stories for enjoyment another time. Thank you so much!

I've just stumbled across this story and found it totally delightful. If you are still reading these comments, I have the four-volume Mardrus & Mathers translation of the 1001 Nights and feel you have very nicely captured the essence of the stories. So here are a belated five stars.

(If you like Arabian Nights stories, you might care to look at my story Pink Djinn. It's a spoof take on the Aladdin story and a lot of readers seem to like it.)

@Maonaigh I have that same translation! The tale of Budur and Qamar was a major influence on this one. Will look yours up when I have a moment.

It’s 2am and I need the be at work at 8am. This story was worth missing sleep

This story is a real jewel, I loved it. Thank you so much!

Exquisite.

The poetry, the riddles, the parallels between the two stories... Glorious. I'm tempted to read this aloud to my wife if I can muster up the courage to admit I read porn. The language deserves to be heard.

Absolutely loved this. It was recommended to me in the forums as an example of interweaving fantasy and reality. The balance between the two was impeccable, the slow interweaving of the themes and the parallel evolving relationships of Rafi and Penny, and Adiba and Makaarim? \*chef's kiss\*

Looking forward to reading more of your work!