All Comments on 'Role Playing with Michelle Ch. 01'

Technically, your writing is way better than most here, but there's something missing. If these are your memories, I'm sure they're hot and sexy for you, but you are not conveying that. You skip over the sex with very few or no details. Saying "It was a superb fuck" with not a word about why it was superb, how it felt (hot? wet? tight?) how she looked and sounded and felt makes the whole thing supremely unsexy and almost clinical. That might be fine elsewhere, but on an erotica site, it's puzzling and flat. You go into so much detail about everything BUT the sex. I don't know if you're embarassed or shy to write about it or... what?

Thanks for your feedback. Actually, this is not about a woman I knew in my real life. But it is difficult to write about the details of sex acts. I was reading Paul Theroux's My Secret History yesterday and he sort of passes through a sex scene in the same way, giving a sentence or two to the actual event.

On the other hand, sometimes what happens before or after is actually more interesting.