Save the Diner

"I don't suggest we have the dinner burnt to the ground because being a 24/7 operation and with people sleeping on that top floor we could be involved in needless deaths."

Three of the councilors looked shocked but Irma looked at Harvey and said, "Then why raise that totally irresponsible suggestion you fool. Don't be irrelevant. What is it you wish to say?"

Harvey said, "Well let's ban street marches for the next three months. That will stop the protesters from publicly flaunting us and getting on TV."

Some thought that was a good idea until Carl Dietrich, director of legal services, said such a move was basically unconstitutional but there were provisions to legalize the banning of marches deemed likely to cause distress, acute dislocation, endanger the public or were of a reprehensible nature that exceeded the norms of decency.

"Such a march would distress me and appear grossly indecent," said the mayor and that produced laughter.

Carl smiled and said, "Bill but can you imagine yourself being prosecuted in court on a charge bought by the protest organization that their supporters were unlawfully prevented from legitimately marching on peaceful protests against a decision of their unpopular council?"

"Christ," snorted the mayor, "they're wrapping protesters in cotton-wool now."

"That's old law Mr Mayor, very all law," said the senior attorney.

The debate continued until the mayor said he was hungry. He asked Irma to arrange it and for the delivery person to phone at the doors because no staff was on and that Heather should remember the regular caterer would be closed because it was Saturday.

Half an hour later everyone but Heather sat in stunned silence watching a young woman arrive carrying a big hamper and with a huge coffee flask strapped on her back. He black apron and the hamper were clearly marked, 'The Diner Catering Service'. When Heather returned from letting the female out and relocking the doors she looked at everyone and said, "Oops, sorry I just didn't think about the politics. I only thought who would be open, who would deliver on Saturday had the best food. Don't eat it... I'll get biscuits from the kitchen."

It was too late of course. Everyone was already scoffing in.

At 2:00 the mayor called for indications of support for the various proposals.

Demolition/removal of Aggie's Diner: The Mayor and Harvey.

Building a single level liberty after raising Aggie's Diner: Harvey.

Abandoning plans for a new library: Harvey.

Leave Aggie's Diner site untouched and find a new library site: Harvey and the four other executives. Noting that support the mayor sighed and raised his hand. He announced he'd call a special meeting of the council on Monday.

* * *

Sonny-Bill spent Monday working on his final action plan. The intention was to attack the council in a succession of initiatives rather than try to club the council with one single burst. A progressive build-up would keep the media interested and he hoped it would spread the save the diner issue to a greater number of people who were prepared to commit.

A special meeting of the council, open to the public and news media, was held that evening to discuss the issue.

Sonny-Bill and Glenn were among the overflow of people who had to stand around the room to listen.

After acrimonious debate led by the chairman of the library committee, Mrs Sanders, the mayor's motion that the council announces it no longer required the site of Aggie's Diner and would look for an alternative site for the new library was carried 9-4 in voting.

Sonny-Bill and Glenn fell into a huge hug and raced back to the diner with the news.

"What now?" Glenn asked.

Sonny-Bill looked a little apprehensive.

"What?"

"Your mom whispered to me the other night when this diner campaign is over she and your father would talk to me about the possibility of me taking over from your mother in the department store. She wishes to retire."

Glenn almost wheezed when she said his only senior academic qualification was a fake degree.

"Yes I know, but I have shown proven competence arising from 'coal-face' experience. I'll get by, probably admirably."

"Oh Christ," Glenn wailed. "Why couldn't I have found myself a conventional guy with your class and big dick?"

Neither of them knew the answer.

Speaking to the media at the conclusion of Monday's meeting, the mayor lied he'd always been against the recommendation that the site of the diner be explored as a possible site for the new library.

"We were worried about the ability of the ground structure in that location being suitable for a heavier concrete structure," he said lamely.

Asked to identify a possible alternative site the mayor thought of something his wife had said and said boldly, "We could look at building a new wing on City Hall. We do have room for expansion."

He went to retract that ridiculous statement but too late: a newspaper and a radio journalist were already racing away with that unexpected disclosure.

A morning newspaper reporter asked sternly why hadn't the council made that suggestion earlier. The mayor seized the moment: "Simply because my advisers did not suggest City Hall as a possible site. I was in bed on Saturday morning fretting about the loss of that institution the diner has became and I suddenly thought City Hall would be an acceptable alternative. We at City Hall just love having citizens and visitors coming through our doors."

"Bravo," said the editor of the Town Crier. "My impression was that officials and councilors considered City Hall as their exclusive castle and regarded the public as being the unwashed mass."

"Oh no Gloria, we are your enlightened mayor and council. That's why we were nursing grave doubts about forcing the diner to relocate. Why on Saturday when we realized there was public opposition to the proposal of our senior officers to location the new library we felt we must back our citizens. Gloria we all know and love Aggie and really do regard the diner as an institution. Why when we had this urgent meeting on Saturday to discuss this revelation that our diner had huge architectural merit, we phoned out for lunch and naturally had the diner supply us as our contract food supplier is closed at weekends."

A reporter and photographer burst into the diner looking for Aggie and were directed to a table when she was entertaining old girlfriends.

"The diner has been saved by a council back down. What is your reaction Mrs Marshall?"

"Oh please call my Aggie darling. You have been a diner here for most of your twenty-one years."

"Well it's great news but I'm disappointed really. I was looking forward to turning the screws into the fucking inept mayor and council."

"But Aggie the mayor said the council had been uneasy about the proposal and now they know the building is considered to be an architectural gem they are thinking of building the new library by attaching a new wing to City Hall."

"That's a pity."

"Why do you say that Aggie?"

"That plans will bury a useful community facility called a library in the depths of a completely irrelevant public outfit called City Hall. But I have faith in the public to sort out this mess. The council still owns the old department building at the far end of Civic Square now being used as a storage warehouse. A grand site for a public library, don't you think? Tim you take my photo and amble over to the bar. Darling you join us ladies for coffee and tell us all the new gossip you know. We've heard some of the young married women share it around as if it were going out of fashion."

* * *

The newspaper next morning carried a new front-page heading, 'Aggie's Diner Saved' and the heading below that was, 'Mayor and Council mislead by over-zealous officials'.

"Oh Christ," said the mayor, mopping his brow in the bedroom and waving the newspaper at his wife. "My officials will be spitting tacks over this."

"Nonsense darling. Council officials have the tradition of being the fall guys and they know they have to accept that."

Bill patted his wife on the tummy and said thanks kid, his favored endearment.

"Oh I must confess I borrowed your idea to possibility located the new library at City Hall. You don't mind that I didn't attribute that idea to you do you darling?"

"No of course not darling. Everyone will be eager to push the dagger into the jerk who came up with that idea."

The mayor turned pale.

"But Bill sweetheart. You have saved our city's beloved diner. Bend down and see what mommy has ready and waiting for you."

THE END