All Comments on 'Seduced by Sin Ch. 01'

Great story! I can't wait to see what happens next, so please update soon :)

If you hadn't stated that this was your first attempt, I would have thought that you have been writing for a while! Excellent start! Will you continue it?

You are heading the right direction. Steady and don't rush.

This is good! I would love to find out more what is going to happen lol.

You did very well for your first attempt in writing a story and I think you have a great story. Can't wait for the next chapter(s)!

...very good!!! For a first attempt...excellent!! Keep going!

very intresting

please write more soon!

Wow! What a way to start a series. Can't wait for more.

amazing story! cant wait for the rest!

Great story; very erotic and well written. But did the fellow really have to have a 9" penis? New writers tend to exaggerate for good effect, but better if he was average size and it wasn't mentioned at all.

You have the idea for a story but you forgot the finer points in writing - that is inconsistencies in your stories.

They were in the pond right? Then how on earth suddenly they were on land and making love? You have got to follow your story closely. Point by point. Do not rush to tell a story until there were too many unexplainable gap like that one. Good try though.

With the commentor who says "too many unexplainable gaps". no need to rush, we'll all be here when you post!

And penis size if more often better not to be given. There's different ways of doing it that sound a lot better.

please keep going