by seducehergood
Presuming English is not your first language ? Needs editing, badly. Some fine ideas but let down by the words.
Good first story and carry on writing but get it proof read in future.
You need an editor who has better english language skills, you had some idea's and potential in this but overall it didn't pan out.
Good luck.
I mean really, this is some Patrick Bateman type shit.
Not enough action. You completely lost me after the first page. TBH I didnt even finish reading it, that's how bad this is.
I came reading this. High achiever woman fucked like a cheap slut! Please write more..
Mouth watering sultry salty Sandy!! Please let us know what happened with her after that!