All Comments on 'Sex With My Cousin Ch. 02'

You've got great talent for erotic writing... you just need to slow down a bit. You're killing all the erotic tension you're building up by getting your characters together two paragraphs from the end... take your time... drag things out... you put details into the buildup... take the same care with the act itself.

Spelling is OK but what's the hurry? It's okay to go slower and have more than 1 page. Ya quit at the good part again. Keep trying and S l o w D o w n !

Nicley done untill the end, you rushed it! why such the need to rush, no real tnesion at all, and i doubt it'd happen that quick anyways, otherwise nice and keep tryin.

Your characters pined for Melissa for YEARS, from 15 till at 19 when they met at the reunion. Melissa confessed to having the same feelings. She obviously wanted to continue the relationship because she transferred to Texas, even though she had a year of more college time and risked losing more credits with change of schools.

First cousin marriage is legal in Massachusetts and Florida, but illegal in Texas. Your character comes across as slightly selfish, and had this been a real person, that this player likely broke Melissa's heart; note, too, she always visited him but not the other way around. And in this tale, your MC was willing to cheat with Alice, Melissa's older sister, in another case of incest that supposedly bothers him. I'm guessing Melissa has kept the affair secret because sisters don't usually date sibling cast-offs. The fact that Alice was also in a relationship and cheated shows neither one is very admirable. Is this serious character flaw a family trait? If so, marriage would seem to be off the table; it would also explain why Melissa didn't confide in her sister. Melissa is well rid of him.

Others criticized the story elements. Those are valid points, but I find the character flaws make this story an unpleasant follow-up to the previous one. Stop rushing the finish and try to have something more admirable than a huge prick as the MC's main quality. Pun optional. No vote for this story, but the previous one earned a 4.

TOO Fucking short ..needs to be much longer. Still was a good beginning