All Comments on 'Sexy Savannah from Number 9'

Your story is good in every aspect, it's just badly written with very bad grammatical errors, repeated wording, and spelling mistakes. It could have been a very captivating story consisting of three, maximum for pages opposed to being drawn out to seven. However, a good story with a good ending.

Hi Manwolff - thanks for taking the time to leave a comment.

You mentioned that the grammar is poor in this story - I am not sure if you are from Australia where this story is set, but I have used a fair amount of Australian slang in the dialogue of some of the characters, and also Australian spelling. And Dino and Katrina's parents are both from Italy, so I have written their dialogue to try and capture their Italian accents. Maybe this was a mistake on my part that could be misinterpreted as poor grammar?

I am from Melbourne , Victoria, ( Altona Meadows) . Stumbling across a lovely understanding lady like Savannah is kinda what happened with me. My parents didn’t hate me, my schoolmates were fine. Like Dino I felt my life was not going anywhere and decided I’d start working. I did a forklift certification course ,successfully , a Dangerous Goods and Driving course - aced the dangerous good s and the theory part of the driving test but failed to get anywhere driving. This story brought back many memories. I can even hear that dinkum Italian Aussie accent.

Brilliantly written story.

I am now a fan of yours for life ( I think)

Garo L vi

I'm glad you liked my story set in Melbourne. Sexy Savannah From Number 9 was one of my works that sort of faded without trace when it was posted, so it was good to get some positive feedback on the story. I had a lot of fun writing it, especially Dino's authoritarian father.

I've written quite a few works set around Australia set in Melbourne, Geelong, Adelaide, Perth, Sydney, Brisbane, the Gold Coast & Darwin if you like stories that take place in Oz.