All Comments on 'Simone Says!'

The sex is hot ...but would benefit from better proof reading - "he wets mouth" nearly lost me!

"(I)f you'll excuse me...." No, my good man, no, I don't think so.

"...which is here it staid...." You've already been called on proofreading!

Don't ever, EVER end a story with "the end." That's juvenile crap. You think we're trying to turn to the next page?

Don’t listen to the naysayers, it was a great first effort. It’s easy to complain and hard to be brave enough to start.

Keep up the good work.

Please read your story before posting it. So many stupid mistakes.

Moth instead of mouth.

Staid instead of stayed.

etc,

Good action, nice lead-ins and build up, good flow but typos distract.

Not bad. I like the style. Do bring more