All Comments on 'Sister'

Needs an editor, badly.

It was a good story. I overlooked errors. A story is a story regardless of mistakes.

It was a good start, but there were some errors. Truth be told I prefer a longer story, one more about the story than just the sex. That's just me. A really good story tells about life. Think about a week worth of time. How many different events go on in that week that have nothing to do with sex, but make the story whole. Again, this is just my opinion, and others may see things differently. Keep writing, find an editor,and enjoy.

"Been" is the past participle of 'be'. It is not the proper spelling, contraction, or substitute for 'being'.

I have noticed that there are some people who just love to be critical and fail to see talent in the act they are being critical of.

I see talent in your story telling and my advice is that if you like/love what you do, then by all means do it. Don't ever give anyone the satisfaction of having even the slightest control over you. I just ignore them, you do just the same.

Can't wait for your next offering.

Sorry, it might be a good story but your writing is atrocious: grammar/spelling…seriously, you should take it down, get it proofed by someone and repost…I'm not trying to be rude, but honest.

The story line was good but the mistakes make it a little less enjoyable. Please don't be put off by this as I'd much rather read your stories even with mistake than have you not post your work. Agree with imsbilly as I also prefer longer stories with more supporting content. Possibly asking another author to proof read would help but whatever you do please keep writing :)

like someone is using voice rather than a keyboard to enter words into a story. The improper use of words is NOT the fault of the "typist" but of the PROGRAM and inability to find the incorrect wording, most of which is no longer taught in our schools. Also why the "voice to print" option is so popular in some areas.

The readers should be used to this by now. Please write more

I'm soaking wet after reading this, and I need a nice hard cock to fill me up ;)

Your story is excellent and the grammar didn't take that much away from it. So, hot that the nerdy brother and his hot sister have had sex, whether unintentional or not. She liked it and I am sure it will happen again soon and even her brother once he calms down and thinks about won't be pushing her away !! Can't wait for the next chapter. Thank you.

Come on, get real eh, another 9" dick - the average is 6 1/2 to 6" plus he wasnt experienced in bed plus his sister was hot,mhe would have blown his lot in minutes man !!

Other than that, great story, enjoyed it but just try get more realistic yea :)

What too many readers / commentators seem to forget is, most of these stories are submitted by amateurs, which makes not only for mistakes but 90% of the time

good reading , like a fine wood desk, a little better "because of" imperfections....... keep going, let us read the next chapter ;)

One of my faves of all time. Absolutely amazing! People get too upset about a few grammatical and spelling errrors. I thought the story was hot and very entertaining.. will re read again and looking forward to a follow up

Joey must be pretty dense, if he couldn't figure what just occurred between Emily and himself. She came on to him, and he did what came "natcherly" - what else? Afterward, she seemed happy, and he certainly wasn't complaining - even as she dominated him with her coffee order. 'Seems like all parties were satisfied, and looking for more.

Please, see with Literotica because, the link to chapther 02 of your story make us go to other Author.....

Thank you

Aunt Helena

" I'm happy just been me." " so they were just been protective." Is your first language English? That should be "being." "...real difficult " REALLY difficult. You don't understand how to use punctuation either. Either learn English or get an editor. I can't read something that looks as though it were written by an illiterate.

Yeah... nice fantasy I suppose but it'd still be in the 6-7 range ;)

Why not keep it realistic, the average boner is around 5.5-6” only a minority have these fantasised 9” ones and if you did have one that big news would travel fast with loads a girls knocking at your door for sure.

Story was great till you dropped in the 9” which ruined it big time for me, try keep it as normal n as real as you can .... please

1* sorry

I admit that i didn't read very much of your story but in the amount i did read there are a couple points of constructive criticism that i would like to share. The first thing that you said was that you are 18. At 18, you are an adult. Many people are parents at that age and almost all have at least become semi self sufficient. They don't need someone to watch them. They are finished with high school and living pretty much on their own but possibly with financial support from their parents. Secondly, you said you are a geek. If you ask most people what their definition of a geek is and it is a studious person, not someone with no social life who still strives for video game excellence instead of looking to satisfy biological urges. The point is make it somewhat believable where the reader can transport himself into the story. He doesn't want to hear of some guy that is ripped and has a 10 inch dick unless he is gay. If a woman's measurements are given, he should know how a woman is measured correctly. Not that you screwed that up; I didn't read that far. The last thing is proof read your work. If you aren't proficient in the English language, have someone else check the grammar, spelling and the punctuation. Good grammar will go a lot farther than dirty talk in any story.

Throughout the story, you used "been" when it should have been "being". Get the words right. It hurt the read for me.

Very nice story of sibling love.

Good premise.

But the sex is too rushed. It starts too fast without anywhere near enough preliminaries, foreplay, teasing. And it's over too fast.

Three stars.

I liked it. Some mistakes but most stories do. Would like to see the sister back in the story to end it.

Another fucking 9" dick; I wish you'd mentioned it earlier in the story so I didn't have to read so much of it.

Super hot sexy and beautiful

weaker than my pullout game

Hmm, I wonder if the author knows what 9" actually looks like. I would def recommend getting a tape measure and measure out 9" and see if women appreciate that size fully into them. Don't know many women who would take a full 9. 7" maybe, 5 and 6" would be more believable.

"9 inch cock" ruined it, that's absolute crazyness.

Not bad…. Love to read about him continuing to fuck her, and becoming more confident and dominant in their relationship, eventually breeding her.

Writing needs a lot of work but it was a fun story, just hard to read, flow is really off.

Good one, but 9" is a cock-&-a-half.

CINCO ESTRELLAS!