All Comments on 'Sister Shares Cabin Ch. 01'

Now It should hang in a gallery

Part 2 is in the works, I hope

I can't wait for ch. 2. This is a well written story with a nice buildup!!!

Eagerly waiting for the next part....

I really enjoyed the story though I can't shake off the feeling that Jon was set up. Maybe not front he get-go but at least front he moment her shared his problem with Beth. Just look at how his sister changed her demeanour for him and all those lines in bed...no way she doesn't know. And who knows maybe even dad knows and somewhat endorses the actions. Or it might just be me and Jon's delusional after being alone for so long.

Anyhow, hope for chapter 2 soon and maybe some real romantic feelings on both sides of the bunk :)

Brilliant story cant wait to read the rest

I agree with the other poster, I indeed know if not from the second he told beth but at least from her saying she knew what was going on while they were swimming. He has been set up and the sister not only knows but is enjoying it. Keep them coming and keep them at least 2-3 pages long.

Is there something wrong with him, he seemed to be mentally challenged. Does he live at an assisted living home or a psych hospital and that is why he has not seen anyone for months? Everyone treats him like he is not quite normal.

I found the story disjointed as though from his 1st person POV, but it is written in 3rd person.

Actual writing is okay but terse. Needs to be fleshed out more to be allowed to flow better.

Title says all

This is the edited and proof read version?

Cool story! Sexy and very, very funny! Keep it coming (so to speak)!

He ain't got a CHANCE! Every time he tries to slow down SOMEONE loads him up again! One of these minutes, he is going to BLOW totally all over his sister! I'm beginning to think that is JUST what EVERY ONE of that family WANTS him to do!

There were a few details I would have added. Why was he on a two month trek in the mountains? How did his sister know exactly where he would come out on the trail? Why was the whole family there?

I have been hiking in the woods and on mountain trails before and I constantly run into people. How did he stay so isolated as to see no one?

Aside from those few details this was a good read. If you continue it add a little spice with a nice double blow with Sara and Beth. Don't turn it into one of those full on family gang bangs where dad, mom and all the aunts, uncles and cousins are banging each other. Just a simple brother, sister, cousin threesome would be nice.

This story is a very good fit for fantasies that I have had.

I hate writers like u who build up the boom were done no finish just hang

It keeps people on the edge and wanting more.

A very good read. Thanks

A little too much angst.

What a sweet sister I hope theres more to come.

Enjoyable. Good tale, especially for a first submission.

I just love a girl who knows how to talk dirty. I hope Sara keeps it up.

Looking forward to the next chapter!! This is a great start.

It's a great start!

But was very short, and ended abruptly!

I hope you have three or four LONGER chapters in mind to finish off the story!!

Good luck with your writing! And I hope to read MORE soon!

Lol

Sarah wanted jon to do all that to her

Very nice! I was worried he'd never get off until I realized what she was doing. Very fun.

Absolutely loved this story can't wait for part 2

part 2

Do people get paid for this? Cause i could really see my self doing this. Also if you want help on the part two contact me at:

Jonathan.Belunek@gmail.com

Very hot.

Jon should have had Sara take his load in her mouth.

Then take her in every way.

So awful and thoughtless.

that one deserves a second chapter.

Great start but where's the rest

7 years later and still no chapter 2? It was a good start, wondering why you never finished it. Was expecting Sara to help him at first, then continuing with his sister. The way mom and dad are, possibly finishing with a tease with mom. So why didn't you finish anyway? Just curious.

Where, oh where is part two?