All Comments on 'Slippery Valentine'

This isn't bad for a first effort. A little dialogue might help, particularly some sort of hot talk. The words "cunt" and "asshole" have a rougher feel than the rest of the story. There is a word missing in one sentence: "I slide my body easily back up your and try to lower my pussy onto your dick." Back up your what? Not a bad start, keep at it.