All Comments on 'Something in the Water'

...and tearful. There are many, many beautiful stories here, and many beautiful people who write them. But this story has touched me so deeply, so profoundly. I'm forever indebted.

The story was great. Sorry for the problems you have had. Looking forward to the next. Story. Bobby

You are a gifted and talented writer. Thank you for sharing. May you find peace.

Im still crying. That was so beautiful and I loved every bit. Thank you for this.

What a beautiful story. So well written. Tears, hope, renewal, and joy, and peace. Somewhere in the world this very story has played out as you have written and in this we can all rest assured that people err, and need to grow, and most of all need to give and receive forgiveness. Thank you. What ever dark shadow grieved you, I hope you have recovered, and if forgiveness was the remedy then let it heal all affected. Peace.

Your kind words, your understanding and acceptance of the story means a great deal to me. Some days are better than others and today, with your well wishes and gratitude has made today one of the better ones.

Everything should be on the up and up.

Much love and many thanks once again.

XX MalevolentBard

Your story touched my heart just like your first one amazing xxx you are a beautiful writer and more power to you that you still find inspiration even though you are troubled xx there is someone out there for everyone and you must have a beautiful soul to be able to write as you do hang in there we are rooting for you xxx and when you are down you can only go up hoping and wishing things get better for you hope you find the job of your dreams and the man of your dreams you deserve it xx keep smiling we love you xxx

A beautiful story about a guy with a great capacity for love. And another who finally realises the importance of love and does his best to ensure that the one he truly loved has a chance of a happy future with another. And then there is Aaron....and Ethan.

Somehow you ensure that the reader is filled with a sense of peace and contentment even though Robert is dead. Arguably he is the true hero of the story and one suspects he will be a faithful guardian angel. And I foresee only one problem. When the two lovers shake off their earthly coil I hope that threesomes are the norm in the hereafter.

I hope your life improves and that you find someone to love and to be loved by. By their writings you shall know them and I suspect you have a great capacity for love and affection. And doubt not that there is someone out there for you and that you will meet and the two of you will have a wonderful life together. Just give it time mate.

Thanks for posting. And as Oliver might have said we want more.

I believe that we all write from hope love and experience. Your story has a resonance that reaches the parts that others barely find. An emotional tour de force of feelings spontaneity and ultimate success. I really enjoyed your writing and congratulate you and through this may you find peace and happiness.

Best wishes

MB, I send you wishes for good health and a peaceful mind. Thank you for sharing this story with us.

You said this story flowed out of you fast, so I hope you go back and take a look at it with a critical eye. You set up scenes where it was impossible for Robert to be dead. He drank three scotches at the bar when they first saw each other. They had dinner together, which means they both ordered from a waiter. And their final dinner was filled with tears and laughter — imagine how Andrew would look sitting in a restaurant talking to himself! I knew from the way he disappeared that Robert wasn’t really there, esp. when Aaron and Allan didn't apologize for interrupting. And didn’t Andrew think himself ill-mannered for not even saying “excuse me” to Robert when they were interrupted? And why didn’t Aaron ask Andrew to point Robert out? He knew Andrew’s ex was supposedly on the scene, yet he was remarkably incurious.

Telling someone you just had sex with that you were thinking of another man during the act is just ... rude. So rude! You should rethink every scene that has Robert in it, to ensure it’s feasible and makes sense.

Effective emotion in the piece; the details just need a little work.

Hey Geemeedee, you're right about the interactions with Robert and Andrew's weird confession while having just slept with another man. I guess in my mind I wanted it to appear as though when Robert was in the room the rest of the world melts away and whatever Robert does or did was Andrew's attempt at making his memory sentient and interactive (giving himself a reason why Robert couldn't be imaginary). It's strange and yeah I definitely need to re-imagine his presence (or lack thereof) and its consequences.

Thank you for the constructive criticism, i really appreciate it.

Light and love.

XX MalevolentBard

I'm a blubbering idiot right now. That was so beautiful. Thank you...

I totally disagree with Geemeedee. It’s a story, you can write what you feel, and it is beautiful. “Unbelievable” things happen. Even if it was all in his own mind it still helped him heal and made a wonderful story. I certainly enjoyed reading it. Thank you.

I agree with Reader.

The author has written a work of fiction, not a report on a matter of fact. Critics have pointed out that the story could not have happened in the real world. So what!

This is a beautiful story. For it to work Rob, whom Andrew didnt know had died, had to appear in a corporal state able to eat and drink and be hit. And Andrew had to believe that he was alive and that others could see Rob. And using this poetic licence the author resolves the heartbreak andrew still feels over his breakup with Rob and enables him to move on and enter a loving relationship with aaron.

The author is following a good example in Shakespeare.

Finally Malevolent Bard you qre a very talented writer who has doubtless cqused many readers to have a lump in their throats or even to shed a tear. Id far rather read your inspired fantasy than the totally correct but lesser works your critics seem to want you to write.

Far too many great artists have been destroyed by critics. Look at Tchaikovsky. Dont let them affect your inapiration

You have such a gift. I truly hope you feel better in your life. My love and best wishes to you. xoxoxo

A totally amazing story. So well done and so well thought out.

Heartfalling and very well constructed story. For that one reader that says that is not very factual persay, well there are many published books were spirits/ghosts thar are part of the characters and become essential in the story. If he is unable tto let see that, then I don't know what else to tell that this reader.

Your support means a great deal, it really does. Thank you so much for reading and offering feedback. I appreciate it beyond explanation.

Love and light.

XX MalevolentBard

You should consider becoming a professional writer!!! That was so well written that I actually cried! The romance was beautiful and the characters were very well thought out and developed! Wonderful!!!!

Thank you for a truly beautiful story. You do indeed write well. Keep mastering your craft. Above all, keep healing. Been there, done that. It’s not easy, but you’ll end up stronger. Your talent is obvious. I wish you good health and good fortune.

It was thrilling to ready this story. I suspected Robert was a ghost when each time Ethan came around with his family, he disappeared. And none of them ever asked Andrew about him. The romance was thick. I love every bit of this story.

Thank you for this wonderful story..It had me sobbing by the end...so heartfelt...well written...love it...hugs and light..xxx

There are really no words to describe how amazing this story was. Thanks for making me feel something, not too many stories do.

Thank you everyone for the kind words and for accepting my work.

I've been away, things have improved slightly and i'm currently receiving help for my depression. You don't know it, but your feedback played a great role in getting my mind right. I don't seek out or necessarily need validation, but when things are darkest, a little light from a stranger can make a world of difference.

Light and love

XX MalevolentBard

I suffer from depression too.

And each time it gets a little too much to handle, I come back to this beautiful story.

I shed a tear reading it and end up feeling a little unburdened than before

So, let me tell you dear author, that you and your story are closer to my heart than anything.

You gave me something to look for in the waters.

Thank you

And I promise that I am not creepy ;)

You MF! You made me love this story and in the end cry to it! Fantastic job! I hope u will write morw in the furture.

The heartbreaking twist to this story near the end had me in a pool of tears. It was uplifting though to know that Andrew became stronger and found his happiness. Loved it.

I was not expecting that. Fantastic story and well written. Keep writing honey, you lifted me and many others.

Hope you feel better soon. xxx

Your comments have been encouraging. I feel that familiar urge to write once again, so i am thankful for your kind words.

Love and light

XX MalevolentBard

Some of the stories on here, just like this one, leave you with a throat burning and watery eyes. You got me, dammit. You got me.

Woah. Totally wasn’t expecting that plot twist at the end. Wonderful story.

This is a truly awesome, gut wrenching, tear making story. Thank you. I love stories that can make me laugh and cry and this one mist definitely did both!

Here I was thinking something was off about how nobody acknowledged the ex and how strange it was he was there of all the places in the world. I was actually thinking that he wasn't and he was representing Andrew getting over the memory, never thought it'd take a supernatural turn lol

One of the better stories I've read on here.

I've read the 2 stories you posted. Each so unique in their voice and prose. This one... Wow. Talk about being moved towards tears, forgiveness, healing, laughter and love.... this spoke from the heart and soul of one who have experienced such healing, forgiveness and a longing for hope. I felt every meaning to the words you chose. Wherever you are now, thank you.

So glad I expected that plot twist, lol. I was honestly expecting him to get over it and find a new love, not to ever forgive forgive Robert. Still don't like him. It's just not my cup of tea, I would have enjoyed it much more if he never saw Robert, who mistreated him for 8 years, again. It would have been perfect if he had never run into Robert after the initial first meeting of Aaron, and it had just been about Andrew and Aaron. But that's not what it ended up being, just what I wanted it to be, no hate to the author, just my opinion. I just gave a lot of hate in my heart, so I could not like or forgive Robert's character at all. I didn't understand him, even after death, the things he did to Andrew were too much for me to forgive