All Comments on 'Stalker'

by Julie20

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2 Comments

Corpse_rider almost 13 years ago

It talks the talk, but does it stalk the stalk?

Story wise this is fine, but more emphasis on what the characters are feeling is required, and a longer sex scene is needed. Has good potential with some re-drafting.

Chimney Sweep almost 13 years ago

A bit raw.

Dark and dangerous, but your style and proficiency are still maturing. MY two best suggestions: read and use an editor. Read good literature; published works, not random LIT smut. The only reason I can write as well as I can (and I'm no master by far) is because I read voraciously when I was young. And using an editor is just incredibly wise. Another set of eyes is invaluable.