Stepping Out in Faith Ch. 03

Marcus noticed the man's reaction though and turned to follow his gaze. The smile that spread across Marcus' face melted Andy's insides, even if it didn't ease all his insecurities. Marcus walked toward him, just like he did that last time, and just like last time, Andy felt his heart begin to race. But this time, it raced out of anticipation rather than fear.

It was like in the movies. Andy didn't think that was possible. Everything around him, the crowd of bodies and the booming of the music, it all faded and all Andy could see was Marcus and the way his body moved as he walked.

There was beauty, right there. The same kind of beauty that Marcus has captured in those drawings, Andy recognized it in Marcus as he made his way to Andy. The fire that had initially sparked in his chest burst into a raging fire. It was so all consuming that he couldn't move, couldn't speak, couldn't do anything until Marcus was in front of him with that teasing smile.

Andy stood transfixed as Marcus leaned in for a kiss. Marcus hovered, just millimeters away from Andy's mouth, both breathing hard and sharing each other's air. That moment seemed to stretch into eternity until the fire burning with Andy couldn't be contained anymore. He closed the short distance between them in a full body kiss, tongues dueling, teeth nipping, bodies pressed flushed and arms reaching around to bring them closer.

All thoughts, all the insecurities, all the confusion was driven from Andy's mind as he gave himself over to the kiss, burying his fingers into Marcus' hair and reveling in the feeling of Marcus' body up against his own. He was already hard in his pants and he could feel Marcus' equally hard dick pressing against his thigh. That only made him hungrier for Marcus.

"Seriously?! Hello?!" A voice sounded off in the distance. "Unbelievable! Ugh!"

Marcus broke off the kiss gently and pulled back a fraction. Andy whimpered and tried to follow him; he hadn't gotten nearly enough of Marcus. As they both caught their breaths, bodies still flush against each other, Andy realized the far off voice was actually standing next to them. It was the guy Marcus was talking to before.

Andy jumped back when he realized they had an audience and put some distance between him and Marcus. He reached up to wipe his mouth and ran a hand through his hair to straighten it. His eyes wide and fixed on this stranger, Andy didn't notice the frown on Marcus' face.

A blanket of guilt settled heavily on Andy's shoulders, a familiar weight he'd been able to momentarily escape while in Marcus' arms. Andy's palms were sweating and his mouth suddenly dry as the blood drained from his face. The stranger didn't approve of him, that much was clear. Perhaps it was because Andy had been caught kissing another man; perhaps it was because Andy was kissing Marcus and this man had plans with Marcus. Either way, Andy felt exposed as the man appraised him with arms crossed and an eyebrow raised.

Marcus cleared his throat.

"Um, Andy, this is Stephen, my best friend since... Well, since before either of us could walk. Stephen, this is Andy." Marcus made introductions, but Andy didn't hear the awkwardness in his voice.

Stephen apparently did because he gave Marcus a skeptical look before giving Andy another once over.

"Pleased to meet you," Stephen didn't sound very pleased as he stuck out his hand.

Andy stared at it as if it was a snake waiting to consume his hand whole. Andy swallowed, trying unsuccessfully to wet his throat.

"The pleasure's mine," Andy croaked around his dry throat as he shook Stephen's hand.

"Sure, it is," Stephen scoffed.

"Stephen!" Marcus scolded before Andy could really process what he had said.

"Sorry," Stephen said while rolling his eyes.

"Jesus, what's the hell's wrong with you?" Marcus swore while Andy cringed internally at the curse.

Stephen raised an amused eyebrow and looked back and forth between Marcus and Andy.

"Language, Marcus," Stephen scolded in return and turned to Andy. "Such a dirty, dirty mouth. But then, you know that already, don't you?"

Andy flushed a bright red as he caught Stephen's innuendo.

"Fuck you, Stephen," Marcus said, stepping in front of Andy defensively.

"Not a chance," Stephen chuckled and walked away.

Andy didn't fully understand what just happened with Stephen. All he knew was that Stephen didn't want him here, that he shouldn't be here.

"I'm so sorry. Stephen can be an asshole sometimes."

Marcus took hold of both of Andy's arms to pull him back into an embrace, but Andy tensed, keeping a distance between them.

"I should go," Andy said, hating how his voice trembled.

"No," Marcus tightened his grips slightly on Andy's arms. "You just got here. Don't let Stephen get to you. He's such a drama queen, it doesn't mean anything."

Andy wanted to believe him. He wanted to believe that everything was alright. But it was clear that Stephen didn't like him, that he disapproved of whatever was going on between Andy and Marcus. Stephen could see what a fraud he was, and Andy couldn't blame him, because he felt like a fraud.

Marcus put a hand on Andy's cheek, forcing him to look up and meet his gaze. The look Andy saw there melted his resolve to leave. The tenderness, the concern, all of it was evident in Marcus' eyes and Andy didn't deserve any of it. But it wound its way into Andy's heart and he knew he couldn't leave. He needed Marcus, he needed to be in Marcus' arms, to touch him, feel his heart beat, breath in his scent and taste him. Marcus calmed his soul, Marcus gave him peace, Marcus made him feel safe. As much as he fought it, he knew it was true. He needed Marcus.

Andy sighed as Marcus pulled him in for a tight hug, both men holding each other close, reconnecting as their heartbeats synced. Andy felt himself calm, setting aside his worries and just enjoyed the feel of Marcus against him.

"Dance with me?" Marcus asked.

Andy leaned back to look at Marcus.

"I thought you didn't dance."

Marcus shrugged, "Think of it as an excuse to hold you."

Andy felt his face flush again, this time over the tender words and the dirty smirk on Marcus' face.

"You lead," Marcus said with a laugh.

"Sure."

Keeping their bodies close, Andy swayed them from side-to-side, slowly turning in a circle. It didn't matter that the club was playing a fast hitting dance beat. They were dancing to their own music. Foreheads touching, noses rubbing back and forth, holding each other so close that their eyes couldn't quite focus on the other's face. They stayed that way, swaying to an unheard melody as the rest of the world faded again.

Andy had no idea how long they were there for, but he wanted to stay there forever. He was surprised at how disappointment he was when Marcus pulled back a fraction.

"I need to go to the bathroom," Marcus said.

"Okay."

Marcus paused with a wry look.

"I'm not sure you should visit the bathroom."

"Why not?" Andy asked for a frown.

"There are... Extracurricular activities in there," Marcus said with a smile.

It took a split second for Andy to fully understand what Marcus was referring to.

"Oh..."

"Don't worry," Marcus said with a laugh. "I just need to pee. Go wait for me by the bar, I'll be right back."

Marcus gave Andy a quick peck on the lips before spinning away.

Andy looked around in a daze, remember where he was. He made his way to the bar through the crowd. He's forgotten how many people there were in the club, and all of them had seen him kiss Marcus and dance with Marcus. Andy ducked his head, not wanting to make eye contact with any of them, not wanting to see what kind of judging look they had.

Andy couldn't quite figure out why he suddenly felt so shameful tonight when he'd been to the club before. This time was different, he realized, because this time whatever he had with Marcus meant something. It was something special and his desire for it was stronger than any desire he'd felt for another man before.

He wasn't just scratching an itch anymore, this wasn't just experimenting. He was being drawn by some invisible force down a path he had conflicted feelings about. But by now it was too late to turn back.

"Hey, Father Andy."

Andy's hackles rose as Stephen saddled up to him by the bar.

"So you're a priest, huh?" Stephen asked.

Andy hesitated, not sure what Stephen was driving at.

"Yeah," he answered.

"But you're gay."

The denial was on the tip of his tongue. No, he wasn't gay. He couldn't be gay, it was forbidden. But that was difficult to argue when he'd just been making out with a man. So he just pressed his lips together, not sure how to respond.

"Oh wait, you can't be gay," Stephen continued. "Because you're Catholic, and gays go to hell, right?"

Yes, that was true. That was what the Bible taught. But Andy suddenly couldn't bring himself to defend the teachings of the faith he held so dear.

Andy didn't like the way Stephen was looking at him, that same appraising look as before, as if Stephen was trying to see into Andy's inner thoughts.

Stephen chuckled and shook his head.

"Listen, I don't know you. Maybe you're a really sweet guy. But I know Marcus and Marcus doesn't always listen to reason. You're deep in the closet, you might never come out. Marcus deserves better than that. He deserves someone like that Charles he was seeing right before you came back into the picture. Charles is a nice guy, he's funny and hot. And most importantly, he's out and proud. He's not ashamed of who he is, not ashamed of what he could have with Marcus. Can you give Marcus that?"

Stephen paused as Andy trembled. No, he couldn't give Marcus that. He didn't know how to give Marcus that.

"No, I didn't think so," Stephen said with a dry chuckle. "So please do us all a favor and stop leading him on."

"Hey, what's going on here?" The tone of Marcus' voice as he approached the bar made it clear that he hadn't heard Stephen's little tirade.

"Oh nothing," Stephen said. "Just having a little heart-to-heart with Andy here. Good talk, sweetheart."

Stephen gave Andy a wink before turning to Marcus.

"I'll see you later," he leaned in for a quick peck on Marcus' cheek before disappearing into the crowd again.

"Andy?" Marcus asked, pulling the man into his arms again.

Andy let him this time, needing the assurance he found there. But he knew it wasn't his to keep. He didn't deserve Marcus, Marcus deserved better than him.

"I should go."

Marcus glanced quickly at his phone to check the time.

"Yeah, sure, let's go."

Andy let Marcus lead him outside. He had meant to go home, but he couldn't bring himself to pull his hand out of Marcus' tight grip.

Outside the club, Andy pulled Marcus to a stop.

"I think I should go home," Andy said. "Maybe this was a bad idea."

"What? Why? Did Stephen say something?" Marcus frowned, one hand tightening around Andy's and the other rose to tilt Andy's head up to meet his gaze.

"No, yes... I mean, it's not..." Andy sighed.

"What did he say?"

"Nothing," Andy shook his head. "He just mentioned your boyfriend."

"My boyfriend? What boyfriend?"

"Charles," Andy admitted, barely able to say the name out loud.

"Charles?" Marcus was incredulous. "I went on, maybe two dates with Charles. He's not my boyfriend."

Andy didn't want to acknowledge to himself how happy he was to hear that.

"Stephen needs to mind his own business, okay? Don't listen to him, he doesn't know what he's talking about."

Andy wanted to believe Marcus so badly, he wanted to discount everything Stephen had said. The rational part of his brain knew that Stephen had a point, but that was so easy to ignore when Marcus was holding him close, looking straight into his eyes, straight into his soul.

"Come home with me," Marcus pleaded.

Andy couldn't resist the hopeful look in Marcus' eyes.

"Okay," Andy gave in to the temptation with a shy smile.

"Okay?" Marcus repeated, as if unsure that was Andy's answer. "Okay."

Marcus tightened his grip on Andy's hand and pulled him close as they headed down the street. Andy kept his head down and focused on the feeling of his hand in Marcus' rather than the urge to check if people were staring at two men holding hands.

They walked quickly but silently. Every once in a while, Marcus would squeeze Andy's hand and he would squeeze back. Each time, it brought a smile to Andy's face. He wasn't sure why, but something about that simple gesture warmed his heart. The heat spread quickly to other intimate regions of his body until he was urging Marcus to walk faster.

The second the door to Marcus' apartment was closed, Andy pushed Marcus up against the wall and took his mouth in a deep, invading kiss. Andy pressed his body up against Marcus, chest to chest, groin to groin, thigh to thigh, his cock jumping at the feeling of Marcus' hardness rubbing through layers of clothing. Andy didn't know what had gotten into him, but he was suddenly desperate for Marcus, needed Marcus in a basic, primal way that defied all thought or reason or faith.

Marcus' hands made their way onto Andy's ass, kneading the muscles through Andy's pants. Andy groaned at the sensation and rubbed himself harder against Marcus, causing Marcus to groan in response.

Andy couldn't take very much of this, he wanted skin on skin contact. He needed to feel Marcus without any barriers between them. He pulled away abruptly, surprising Marcus.

"Clothes," Andy explained in a breathless voice. He made quick work of his shirt and was pushing down his pants before Marcus could process the command.

Andy was naked and pulling Marcus toward the bed while Marcus was still working on his tight jeans. Andy sat down on the edge of the bed and positioned Marcus between his spread legs, his hands on top of Marcus' as they pushed down the jeans together.

Andy buried his face into Marcus' crotch, desperate for the scent of Marcus. He wrapped his lips around the bulge through the cotton of Marcus' briefs, mouthing at the muscle underneath. His lips found the wet spot and sucked to taste the pre-cum soaking through. It tasted like Marcus, cinnamon and spice, and Andy needed more. He needed to be filled with Marcus, to be claimed by Marcus, to know that he and he alone belonged to this beautiful man.

"Oh god, doe eyes," Marcus' hand were buried in Andy's hair, holding him in place as he rubbed his groin in Andy's face. Andy felt like he was getting marked by Marcus, and the thought left his head spinning with desire.

Andy hooked his fingers underneath the waistband of Marcus' underwear and pulled it out and over the thick column of Marcus' cock. Andy took a split second to admire its beautiful proportions, thick and long, decorated with engorged glands and smoothly shaved skin all around. Then he dived down, taking Marcus into his mouth as deep as he could make it go.

Andy's gag reflex immediately kicked in and he had to back off to catch his breath.

"Whoa, easy there, doe eyes," Marcus panted with a laugh, brushing the hair off of Andy's forehead.

Andy tried again, pushing himself as far down onto Marcus' cock as he could go before bobbing back up, using his hand to make up the difference.

"Oh god," Marcus groaned again, music to Andy's ears.

Andy loved this, the way his jaws stretched wide to accommodate Marcus' girth, the weight of Marcus' cock on his tongue. He loved the way his mind emptied of all worries and focused on the taste and feel of Marcus in his mouth. But there was something else Andy wanted more.

Andy pulled off Marcus, hollowing out his cheeks to suck out one last dollop of that delicious pre-cum onto his tongue. Then, grabbing Marcus' hand, he scooted back on the bed, pulling Marcus down on top of him. Andy opened his legs and let Marcus settle himself in between his thighs.

"Please, Marcus," Andy pleaded. "I need you."

Marcus growled deep in his chest and pressed Andy down into the bed with a bruising, demanding kiss. Their tongues dueled as Andy arched up into him, sweat-sheened skin sliding against skin, leaking cocks rubbing against each other.

Marcus reached underneath Andy's knees and pushed them up until Andy was almost folded over in half. Andy gasped at the abruptness of the move, but felt his cock pulse painfully at being manhandled by Marcus. Andy grasped his shins to help hold his legs in place while Marcus dove down to attack Andy's hole with his talented tongue.

Andy squirmed under the assault, the wetness probing his ass sending shivers through his body. His stomach clenched as he felt Marcus' tongue find its way inside past Andy's tight ring of muscle. Marcus quickly replaced his tongue with a finger and Andy bore down on it to suck it as deeply into his body as he could.

Andy was still sore from the night before, but he was quickly learning to appreciate that delicate mix of pain and pleasure.

"More Marcus," Andy begged, breathlessly.

Marcus slid another finger in his ass and scissored them back and forth before searching out Andy's prostate. Electricity shot through Andy's body, almost lifting him straight off the bed.

"Please, Marcus."

Andy grasped at Marcus' arms, trying to pull him up so he could replace his fingers with that long gorgeous cock. Marcus placed one last kiss on Andy's ass, then reached over into his nightstand for the obligatory lube and condoms. He made quick work of rolling the condom onto his cock and then slathered with it a generous helping of lube. He did the same with Andy's ass before shifting into position, rubbing the head of his cock at entrance to Andy's body.

"Easy, doe eyes," Marcus' voice sounded strained. "I'm not sure I prepped you enough, I don't want to hurt you."

"You won't hurt me," Andy said. "Don't be gentle, I need you."

Marcus growled and claimed Andy's mouth as he pushed his hips forward seeking entrance. Andy felt the pressure and bore down, willing his body to accept Marcus. Slowly, he felt his muscles respond and the head of Marcus' cock popped in past the tight ring of muscle.

A quick shock of pain radiated out from Andy's ass, even as his balls drew up at the pleasure of being penetrated and stretched wide. Andy took fast shallow breaths as he fought against his body's reaction to eject the foreign object.

Andy shifted his legs until they were up around Marcus' thighs, ankles hooked around Marcus' body. The movement set fire to his ass, a raging fire that threatened to consume him. Andy used his feet to pull Marcus deeper inside him. He needed more.

Marcus got the message and pressed forward steadily, not stopping until he was fully seated. Andy was impaled, filled to overflowing with Marcus, every inch of his body wound up tight, ready to shatter. This was it, this was what Andy wanted, what he needed. Marcus inside of him, in the deepest, most intimate part of him, the place where no one else had ever been, knowing him in a way no one else had before.

Andy held Marcus close, seeking out his mouth so their tongues could dance. Marcus obliged, pressing deep into Andy, twirling his tongue in and out of Andy's mouth until Andy was squirming. Andy shifted his hips, gasping at the combined sensation in his ass and the way his cock rubbed against Marcus' hard stomach.

"Please Marcus," Andy whispered against Marcus' lips, tilting his hips up against Marcus.

Slowly, Marcus pulled out until just his head was inside Andy's tight sheath. Andy's skin tingled at the feeling of his empty channel. Then Marcus pushed in, filling Andy again and squeezing all the air out of Andy's lungs.

Marcus was moving too slowly for Andy's liking. Andy planted his feet flat on the bed and drove his hips up to meet Marcus on his next stroke. It caused Marcus to shudder and Andy to groan in pleasure.