Strike Three. You're Out! Pt. 03

"I'm sorry Paige, but this is for the best. Look, I'll be right next door. If you need me, you just call me, okay?"

With that, Paige dissolved into tears. And even though my heart had long ago hardened toward her because of the way she had destroyed me, I couldn't help but take her into my arms. I held her tightly as she sobbed into my chest, stroking her hair and reassuring her that things would turn out fine. It seemed like she would never break away from me that night, but eventually, I steered her toward the bedroom and let her in. Then I slowly backed away to head back downstairs.

Let me pass this back to the narrator for a bit, as I'm too upset to go on.

**********

There wasn't anything about her old bedroom that seemed strange or out of place, only that Rocco wasn't in the room with her. She put on one of her old nightgowns, peeled the covers back, and crawled into bed. Sleep would not come. And as she tossed and turned, panic began to set in. She couldn't believe, nor would she accept that she and Rocco simply fell out of love. As the panic took hold, she began to sob. Her crying became so intense and so sustained that she began hyperventilating. Rocco heard it from the living room downstairs and he quickly sprinted up the stairs to their old bedroom.

In a worried tone, he knocked on her door and asked, "Paige? Are you okay? What's wrong? Do you feel sick?"

"I'm fine," Paige replied after she managed to pull herself together. "Just a lot to accept, is all. But thanks for checking."

When she knew Rocco had retreated, the crying started again, but she managed to muffle her sobs into her pillow. "Why God?" she asked over and over again. "Why?"

That first night proved to be a sleepless one for both of them. On the second night, Rocco heard the crying once again. This time, he knocked on the door and told Paige he was coming in. Before she had a chance to send him away again, he quickly, and with purpose, entered the room and sat down on the bed.

"You're not okay. Come on Paige, talk to me."

"I'm sorry, Rocco. I'm probably causing you a lot of trouble. I'll leave tomorrow. You don't need me here to complicate your life."

"Paige, I told the doc that I would take care of you. So, I'm going to insist you stay here until he thinks you can go out on your own."

Once again, her tears flowed, and despite all of the pain he'd been through when he left her, his heart ached for her. She sat up quickly and tentatively asked in almost a whisper, "Can you hold me? Please?"

He wrapped his big arms around Paige, and held her tightly, just as he had the night before.

"Make this all go away, Rocco. Please make it go away."

"Okay. I've got you. Just hang on to me."

Without asking, he gently pushed her down on the bed. She burrowed her head into his chest, and after several minutes she quieted down and fell asleep in his arms. After a brief time, he managed to extricate himself from her tight hold on him. He left her asleep in her room, alone. It was, however, another sleepless night for him.

Since it was the off-season, Rocco spent virtually every minute with Paige, tending to her recovery. After a while, they settled into a familiar, if not altogether uneasy and awkward, coexistence. On one particular Sunday afternoon, he had to attend a baseball banquet. When he arrived home, the aromas that emanated from his kitchen nearly knocked him over. Good old Texas style beef stew and cornbread awaited him. Paige was so proud of herself for doing something that didn't require his help. She was really starting to feel like herself again. And so, there they sat, eating their dinner in relative quiet. Rocco knew that the feeble truce he had settled into with Paige would sooner or later have to come to an end. But at this point, he had absolutely no clue how that eventuality would play itself out.

Over the course of the next couple of weeks, Paige and Rocco began to become even more comfortable with each other. They would watch television together, go out to eat and to the movies, and do things that normal loving couples did...except for the sex. Throughout this entire ordeal, Rocco fought with himself to suppress his natural desire to make love to the woman he coveted and craved more than any other. He couldn't let himself slip down that slope because he knew how it would end. He fought very hard not to let his guard down.

For Paige, she was doing all she could to encourage a physical reunion. She would initiate holding hands. She would kiss him hello when he returned to the house, even though these were mostly chaste kisses on his cheek. Rocco went to sleep on many nights with a severe case of blue balls. When watching television, she would be the one to cuddle up to him. He did nothing to resist her, but he did not take it to the next step, until one day about six weeks after he brought her home. Rocco and Paige were watching television. She was wrapped in his arms, holding him tightly as if he were going to disappear. Rocco could feel her trembling.

"What's the matter, Paige. You okay?"

"Just a little cold, Rocco," she said tentatively.

With his index finger, he reached under her chin, tilted it up slightly, and met her eyes with his. It was at that moment that his pain was released and all anger toward her fell away. His resistance melted away as his desire for her overtook any rational thought he may have had about not falling in too deeply into the abyss. Their mouths slowly moved closer, hesitating only to stare deeply into each other's eyes. They stopped and started to kiss each other softly and sheepishly at first, the way new lovers do. Their lips barely brushed against one another until both knew that the moment was right. It wasn't long before their soft kisses ignited their desires. The gentle kisses became more urgent, their lips parting to allow their tongues to become reacquainted with each other.

"Make love to me Rocco. I need to feel you close to me. I need to know we still have something special. Please Rocco. Don't make me beg. I can't wait any longer. I need my husband."

Rocco gently disentangled himself from her hold on him, slid down the coach, and removed the sweats she was wearing. He kissed every inch of both legs with a hunger that had been building for two years. Her arousal was apparent, both from the wet spot on her panties and the musky aroma emanating from her pussy.

"God, how I missed this," Rocco moaned.

"Me too, darling. Me too." Paige replied.

He put his right hand under her ass, elevated it slightly, and with his left removed her panties. Her pronounced and engorged clit and its need to be stimulated was obvious. Rocco kissed her inner thighs, and then her labia. While parting her pussy lips with his fingers, he applied pressure with his tongue on her clit, which sent Paige rocking to her first orgasm only seconds afterward. He continued his tender onslaught on her pussy and sent her to another quick come.

Without any words being exchanged, Rocco stood up and removed his clothes. He put Paige's arms around her neck and encouraged her to wrap her legs around his waist. She didn't need much inspiration. He lifted her and carried her into the bedroom, his engorged cock bouncing against her ass as he walked. Once he was at the bed, he slowly put her down, climbed up into the missionary position, and made love to her. Rocco went slowly, and at one point, stopping altogether, pausing to kiss her again while not moving inside of her pussy. They stood like that for what must have been a long time, just enjoying the feeling of coupling and kissing. Because he had made love to this woman so many times before, he knew the exact moment when her passions would build to a crescendo. It was at that moment that Rocco withdrew and then plunged back into her warm, velvety love tunnel. The cadence of their lovemaking built and the pace became faster and faster, flesh slapping against flesh, when, in a short time, Rocco released his spunk into her. At the same time, Paige was in the throes of the most powerful orgasm she could ever remember. While she was normally very vocal when she came, the intensity was so off the charts for her, she opened her mouth but nothing would come out.

When they had both come down from their passion, they lay together and eventually drifted off to sleep in each other's arms. For both of them, it was the most satisfying sleep they've had in two years.

The next morning, Rocco got up before Paige and went for an early morning run to clear his head. When he got home about an hour later, he found Paige in the kitchen making her famous pancakes, down-home Texas style, with real buttermilk. He came into the kitchen and she immediately jumped into his arms. She kissed him passionately and murmured, "I have my husband back. I'm so happy Rocco." It went on like this for several days.

Rocco did indeed feel as if he got his life back. Yet, somehow he knew that sooner or later, Paige would get her memory back. He had no idea how this fucked up situation would resolve itself once that happened. Their lovemaking continued in the days that followed. It was so passionate and tender that it was hard to believe that she had once injured and damaged him so badly. While Rocco knew this wouldn't last, he was hoping against hope that this was a new beginning for them.

After breakfast one morning about a week later, Rocco reminded Paige that he had to go out of town that afternoon for a sports banquet that evening. It was only a four-hour drive and he thought about asking her to come along. In fact, she was waiting for him to ask him. But Rocco held back, deciding that after the events of the last few days, perhaps he needed some alone time to give this situation further thought. It was obvious that Paige was more than a little gloomy about being alone for the night. But she knew without Rocco telling her, that he needed some space. She would be there for him when he returned, with the promise of even more fervent and regular love-making.

By the time Rocco had finished up at the banquet and started the drive home, he had made up his mind that he and Paige would indeed start life over and live together again as a married couple. It had been several months since the doctor told him that if her memory was going to return, it would do so in four to six weeks. They were long past that, so he figured nothing would change.

When he walked through the front door to his house, he fully expected to be greeted once again by the sweet aroma of beef stew and cornbread, and a very alluring wife wearing something naughty and revealing. What he found was something far different; as a matter of fact, it was the absolute last thing he expected. An envelope was left on the kitchen table. On it was written his name. As he picked up the envelope, his hands were trembling. He thought to himself, "Please don't let this be what I think it is. Please God, no." It wasn't long after he read the first several lines of Paige's letter that he knew his worst fears would be realized.

My Dearest Rocco,

First, let me say that I'm sorry for all the hurt I've brought down on you - more sorry than you could ever imagine. I never thought I could hurt the man I so desperately loved and still do. But I did hurt you and I can't take that back. I live with that reality every day.

By now, you've probably surmised that the reason for the letter is that my memory returned. After you left yesterday afternoon I developed a terrible headache. I took something for the dull ache in my head and then tried to grab a nap. I fell into an uneasy and fitful sleep. When I awoke, I suddenly remembered everything that had happened since the time you left me two years ago leading up to my car accident. All of the terrible things I did to you came flooding back into my head. I realized that the hurt was so excruciatingly deep and painful for you that, despite the lovemaking and our closeness over the last few days, there was no way you could actually forgive me. I could sense that you were holding something back from me during our lovemaking. Now I know why.

I love you so much, I can't take the chance of hurting you ever again. It is because of my love for you that I'm leaving you. You may be sad for a while, but when you remember the torment I put you through two years ago, I'm sure you'll be able to move on and finally put our marriage behind you. I'm sorry my accident brought me back into your life.

Understand that right now I want nothing more than to pick up where we left off yesterday and resume our lives together. But knowing what I did to you, I just don't think that's possible. I never did get a chance to really explain my stupid and immature actions that led to our parting. I'm sure you don't want to re-live those days, but I also feel strongly that I owe you an explanation.

Do I have a reasonable excuse that would justify what I did with Jeremy? No. I need to take responsibility for tearing us apart. Sure, I can blame it on hormones, loneliness, and depression after we lost the baby. I could also tell you that Jeremy chased me and wore me down. All of that is true. He was a predator. But none of it explains why I went down that road. The answer, plain and simple, is that I was lonely and thought I deserved the comfort of another man. How totally and monumentally stupid I was. But it is all on me. You did nothing to deserve this. You were and still are the best lover and best friend I've ever had.

Following our break-up, I tried to give it a go with Jeremy. But as soon as you were out of the picture, he lost interest in me. It was then that the finality of my actions really hit me. My friends, co-workers, and even family disowned me. I obviously couldn't go to your mother for help. And I know that when we were married, she loved me as if I were her own daughter. I spiraled into a deep depression. So, I moved several towns away, got myself another job, got some therapy, and moved on with my life. But I never forgot about you. Whether you believe me or not, I missed you and loved you throughout the entire two years. I never dated, and didn't even have any interest in other men.

I'm sure you remember Nicky Faggioli, one of the managers in the Texas league. Well, when you umpired down there, his wife Candice and I attended games together and we became friends. When he moved up to the majors, we stayed in touch. I told her about our situation. Turns out Candice was, and still is, a good friend despite what I had done to you. Anyway, she kept me up to date on your umpiring career, and she let me know when you made it to "the show."

I want you to know that even though I broke our marriage vows, I did manage to keep one promise to you. When you were working your first game, I was there. I was in the stands, in the upper deck where I knew you couldn't see me. When I saw you come on to the field for that first game and position yourself behind first base on the foul side, I was so very proud of you. My heart just burst for you that you finally achieved your dream. I thought about what we would have done after the game to celebrate if we were still together. Maybe go to Antonio's and have a special meal, and just spend time with one another. Do you remember all the special nights at Antonio's when you would come home from your road trips? At one point, I got lost in the moment and was actually thinking I would meet you after the game. When reality hit, I just left the ballpark, went home to my lousy apartment, and cried.

Several months after that, when I knew you would be in town again, I went to another game. I remember as if it were yesterday. If I was proud of you at that first game, I was bursting even more at this one. It was on July 4^th and the home team had a pre-game ceremony for all of the veterans on both teams as well as the umpiring crew. You were the only umpire who was a veteran. The public address announcer read off the battles that you and others had been in. And then he read your citation for your Silver Star. Rocco, I had no idea. You never told me about your time in the service. In fact, I didn't even know you were in the Marines until that day. To think that at one time I thought that you weren't as courageous as that scumbag who seduced me. I'm sorry. That's all I seem to be thinking lately...how sorry I am.

Rocco, you deserve a woman and a partner who will always be true to you. I'm terrified that something ugly will trigger inside of me and I will hurt you again. I can't take that chance. I've reconciled with my brother, which is a miracle, since he was and still is royally pissed at the mess I've made of my life. I will be moving back to Texas and will be staying with him until I get a job and get my own place down there.

One last thing. On the day you left me two years ago, you had fired a bunch of questions at me. I've often thought about those questions. After you left, I never gave Jeremy a chance to do the things that you did. I'm certain, given that he was just a destroyer of marriages, I never took his breath away when I brushed my hand against his. He had no interest in spending his life with me. He never cherished me, nor did he show any outward signs of affection or love. All he wanted to do was get into my pants and win some stupid battle to conquer you. He never doted on me, didn't take care of me when I felt sick or depressed, and really didn't care if other men admired me. No, my darling. Only you did those things.

You are a great guy. Any woman would be lucky to have you. Find a good woman, one you could trust. One who won't trample on your heart. Forget about me. I'm not worth it anymore.

I'll always love you. Thank you for taking such good care of me during my recovery. You were under no obligation to do that. You did it because you are a special guy.

Know that with all of my heart I'm so very, very sorry.

Paige

After he read the letter, Rocco was overcome. His expectations for a reconciliation when he left the day before were so high. Although he knew this was a possibility, he got lulled into a false sense of security. He made the only decision he could make. He got on the next plane to Texas to get Paige back. He would tell her all was forgiven, and they would pick up where they left off. He would do whatever it took.

The next day found Rocco at the door step of Paige's brother. When he rang the doorbell it seemed like hours before someone finally answered. There stood her brother's wife at the door, with a despondent look on her face and tears in her eyes. She hugged Rocco, and he knew then that something was not right. She welcomed him in. With no words passing between them, he knew.

"Rocco. You don't know, do you? I'm so very sorry, but Paige passed away last night."

He felt like he had been punched in the gut. He remained motionless and speechless, just standing there with his mouth hanging open. He tried to speak, but no words would come.

"The doctors explained that she had an aneurism that was likely caused by her accident months ago. They said the doctors in New York had no way of knowing what was going on that deep in her brain."

Rocco was crushed. He barely made it through the funeral the day after. When they lowered the coffin into the ground, he waited until everyone left. Then he got down on one knee in front of the grave and said a silent prayer, as tears flowed down his cheeks.

Strike three.

Epilog

It was a cold December night one year later when all of Rocco's planning would pay off and he would exact revenge for Paige. Rocco hunkered down low in the back seat of Jeremy's Mustang. He took great delight in visualizing the pull of the trigger and seeing Jeremy's brains splashing against the windshield after the small caliber bullet left the muzzle of his father's 38 caliber Saturday Night Special.