by Rag-Wed
I really loved the way you play it up. I do feel that you hurried the climax of your story though. That the lust they had for each other was not play out enough. I will really be looking forward tosee what else you wright.
The slow startup speed could have handled an extra chapter (or perhaps even two) before the climax (no pun intended :) but it was beautiful the way it is now, too.
Beautiful story, very innocent
Should continue a few more chapters. Thank you.