All Comments on 'Summer Wind'

Good story.

The entire story seemed so...distant.

I never was able to mentally crawl into the first-person FEEL of the main character in this story.

Perhaps because he never told us how he felt beyond a few brief descriptions of what he felt. The story seemed to lack any sense of intimacy - it felt more like a travelogue than a real story to me.

*** for effort.

sounds like paradise to the untrained mind. TK U MLJ LV NV

Glad to see you back. A nice read. Five stars.

It seemed like you were very careful not to get too deep in this story. I couldn't feel much for the main character since he didn't seem to have that much depth to him. She just says she's leaving and walks away and he only does a few things to find her? And then they get back together in just a few paragraphs and all is forgiven? A good story that had the potential to be more.

JR, for me, what I enjoyed about this story was how you developed the premise of your storyline from the original song. Yet kept your plot within a reasonable level of believability.

and the hero has found it. Good to see you back in the saddle again. You have a style which leaves me feeling that the person telling the story is an old friend who needs no introduction.

I looked up your other stories and got caught up in Cold Rain.

I am looking forward to read more of your stories.

Thank you for sharing them with us.

D.S.

Not a very emotional story. Seems like something of a travel brochure.Like the details about Hawaii.

The protagonist was drifting through life. He has a job that he enjoys and family in Arizona. That's about it. She spent time with him. Panicked and left for the mainland.

Years (4 or5) later .back in Hawaii they met again. Marriage and two more children followed.

Gave you 2*s. Lazy writer syndrome. Thanks for the attempt.

AMerryman

Your stories are always very good to great. And here's the But, this read was like a long narrative. what happened. Every paragraph was I said this or she said this or that. Normally your writing contains lots of dialog between two people, this read like a statement written for a High School report. I would rather see it go on for 4 or 5 pages with the dialog inserted than this report style you used. I normally rate your stories mostly 5***** this got a 3. I know you can do better!

Very little action or emotion and the story ends abruptly like you got tired of it.

Unless the other parent is abusive, there is no excuse except being a fucking horrible human being. They themselves should lose their parental rights since they obviously can't be trusted to do right by the child.

There is something missing with this story. It is too pat, too cut and dried at the end.

Since the time frame was the early 60's and the stigma of unwed mothers in Military, I can see it her dilemma, but Jerry was not enlisted - a civi and would be willing to marry. The issue I have is that she resigned her commission so there was no reason not to communicate with Jerry and let him know/enjoy Angela. Why did her parents let this continue - as they knew he was in the dark and she loved him so much?

Sorry, but this story went into a rush-to-finish mode that made the fairy-tail, stupid. It lost credibility. 3* due to the last half page and a rush-to-finish. Oahu sucks - tourist trap and expensive (stationed in Pearl once).

But just too unlikely that she could walk away from the father of her child if she loved him.

Great story with a little pain & great ending.

As always a great read but as always so much left unsaid

I don't see how she could "love" him and then leave for so long when she found out she was pregnant with HIS kid.

Made me miss the Mogollon Rim and Payson

I now live in a state that is so flat if your dog runs away you can watch it run for 3 days

Love can last for year.

When my latest story gets published Phoenix, Payson and the Rim are mentioned.

5 stars

Angie was a fucking dumb cunt to run away after discovering she was pregnant and without letting him know!!

This MC is a stupid asshole, another dumb man just so accepting if the army slut that came back with Angela