Sweet Ass Pt. 08

"When did you start seeing him?"

She said that he showed up at work the week before the party for Marcus. She said her initial reaction, after she got over the surprise of seeing him, was anger. He left her during their senior year at college because he 'wasn't ready to settle down.' Amy was still angry with him for that.

He invited her to lunch the following Monday, on her day off. She was curious about him and figured that would be a good opportunity to let him know she was no longer available, and that was how she ended up meeting him at the bar. At lunch, he told her he realized he made a mistake shortly after he broke up with her in college, and he hadn't been happy since. He gave details about his failed romances.

The subject of me never came up, apparently. I made a note to punch the guy in the face at my first opportunity. "How did you respond to him?"

"I told him I was happily married and was not interested in having an affair." Amy replied, looking me in the eye. "He said he heard rumors that I had been involved with a coworker recently, and I told him those stories were a lie."

I sighed, "Okay, please continue."

Amy said they talked several times at work over the next few days, and he made a point to tell her how good it was to see her again, how great she looked, and how much he still missed her. She apologized for letting herself be swayed by his constant attention.

Then he asked her to have a drink with him after work on Friday, the night of the party. She explained that she was hosting a party and couldn't do it. I wondered silently why she didn't say she couldn't do it because she was married. He kept after her and convinced her to stop for just one drink. She did, and that was the first time he kissed her.

Amy stopped, and a tear rolled down her cheek as I asked her, "Why did you let him kiss you?''

"I don't know. This is where things get confusing to me. After he kissed me, I said I couldn't do what he wanted me to do. He said he still had feelings for me and, based on how I returned his kiss, he thought they were mutual. I told him he was wrong, and left him at the bar to head home."

That explained her lateness, and the strange mood she had been in that night.

"I saw you texting someone during the party Friday night. Was it Nathan?"

Amy nodded. "I made the mistake of giving him my number, and he kept texting me to tell me he wanted to talk. I texted back no, and he threatened to call me instead unless I agreed to talk to him. He said if I would meet him on Sunday afternoon, he would not bother me any more the rest of the weekend, so I agreed."

Amy looked at me searchingly, "Please don't ask me why I didn't tell you about everything then, before it went any further. I have been asking myself that same question and don't have an answer.

I made him meet me at the library so we would be in public and I could control the situation easier. I pretended to look for books while he followed me and whispered how much he missed me. He made it sound like he couldn't live without me. I told him it was over between us, and he gave me a puppy dog look and asked how I could know that without at least giving us one more chance. I knew that meant that he thought if he could fuck me, he could change my mind.

We bantered back and forth, and I suddenly realized how late it was getting. I told him I was leaving and he walked me to my car. When I unlocked it, he put his lips on my neck and wrapped me in a hug. You know how sensitive my neck is, and apparently he remembered too, because it forced me to turn towards him to get away.

His lips slid over mine as I started to tell him no, and he stuck his tongue in my mouth. Before I realized it, I was kissing him back."

Amy stopped, and wiped her hair out of her face with a shaky hand. I could see that just describing the kiss to me was affecting her, and my heart sank.

"Did you head home after that?" I asked.

"Yes."

"What happened this week while I was gone?"

Amy said she had lunch with Nathan at work on Monday, and he talked about all the fun times they had together in college. He reminded her of several trips they took and mentioned mutual friends they had who he had reconnected with since he returned to the area. He said he was organizing a reunion with several of those friends and asked Amy to attend. That was where she was on Tuesday night.

Amy said there were two other guys and a girl at the get together. The guys had been Nathan's buddies, and the girl was a girlfriend of one who had since married him. She hadn't seen any of them since Nathan broke off their relationship, but they all seemed happy to see her again and she enjoyed catching up with them.

"What happened when they asked you about what you have been doing since college?"

"When I tried to reply, Nathan would jump in and tell them about me working at the hospital. He didn't let me get into my personal life with you. I could tell that the others were confused, because I was wearing a wedding ring."

"What happened after that?" I asked Amy.

"I had a few drinks while we were all catching up, and we talked until after 10 o'clock. The others said they had to go, and Nathan offered to drive me home. He pointed out that I had been drinking and hadn't eaten, reasoning that I shouldn't drive myself. I knew he was right, so I told him he could drop me off at my house but that nothing else was going to happen. I was very clear about that."

Amy drew a shaky breath and began to fidget. "At least I thought so at the time. On the way home, I saw your call come in. I debated whether to answer, and decided that I couldn't because I couldn't explain what I was doing if you asked.

I jumped out of his car when we got here, and told him thanks, hoping he would stay in the car and leave. Instead he insisted on walking me to the door. Once he got me there, he tried to kiss me again, but I turned my head.

He whispered in my ear that he couldn't stop thinking about me, and he wanted me. I repeated that I was married, and he said he knew about Jamal. This made me look at him, and he said I must not be very happy if I was sleeping with other guys and not taking calls from my husband when he was traveling.

I got mad, and told him to go fuck himself. He laughed and said he still loved my temper. Then he kissed me again and I began to fight him. I was pushing against him and trying to get away, but some part of me began to respond to his kiss."

Amy stopped and looked at her hands.

"Go ahead, I want to hear everything." I coaxed her.

"Oh Randy, I am so sorry. I felt a mix of emotions while he was kissing me. I remember when we broke up that I would have sold my soul for him to come back to me like that. For some reason, I couldn't remember the pain he caused me when he left, I just felt that old yearning for him again.

Then I started rationalizing that you would probably be okay with me having sex with him if I told you upfront, so if I did it and then told you about it later, it would still be okay. I knew that was a lie, but I was drunk, so I let myself kiss him back."

"Did you sleep with him that night?"

Amy softly replied, "Yes."

I sat with Amy, thinking about the mess we were in. I realized that no part of me was excited by or happy with the fact that she fucked Nathan. "It must have been pretty good for you to convince you to stay with him the following night."

Amy looked at me in horror. "How did you know about that?" she asked.

I reminded her that I had misplaced my phone, and explained how I noticed hers was not at home when I checked the tracking app.

Amy began crying again, "Oh my god, you have known about this for two days, and had to wait until tonight to ask me about it. I am so sorry, Randy. I feel like shit for what I did." Her body was convulsed with her sorrow, and I couldn't stop myself from putting my arms around her to comfort her, despite my anger.

We sat like that for a while. Amy softly stroked my chest as she wept, and I hugged her body against my side. My mind was analyzing everything I had heard so far and I was worried. Amy was sorry, but hadn't yet mentioned ending things with Nathan.

The only explanation for that was that she was now conflicted about whether she wanted to be with him or me. I couldn't bring myself to ask her that question.

Chapter 38

Amy got up to use the bathroom, and I sat dejectedly on the bed. Her phone signaled an incoming message, so I picked it up and read it. The number was not associated with a contact name, but I guessed it was Nathan from the content.

"Can U get away 2 C me this wknd?"

I unlocked Amy's phone using her password and replied, "Stay away from Amy asshole".

Amy came back in the room and rushed over to me when she saw her phone in my hand. I scrolled up to see if there was a message history with that number, but Amy must have been deleting them.

She looked down and read the exchange between me and Nathan, who had not responded to my text.

I handed her phone back to her and said, "I don't want you to see Nathan outside of work anymore, and you need to limit your contact with him at the hospital to just what is required for your job."

Amy took the phone and said, "I won't lie to you anymore, or hide what I am doing, but I have some things I need to work out with Nathan, and I will need to see him outside of work to do that."

Shit, my worst fear was confirmed. He had wormed his way back into her heart. "Are you in love with him?" I forced myself to ask.

"No! I mean, I don't know. I have feelings for him and I don't understand them. I love him as a friend, and we have a physical attraction to each other, but..."

Her open ended response made no sense to me. "Listen Amy, you and I made a promise to each other when we married. Even with all of the changes to our relationship over the past year, we still remained true to each other in our hearts. I have never felt unsure that I want to spend the rest of my life with you. Don't you still feel that way about me?"

"Of course I do. I still love you dearly," Amy replied, "but I can't deny my feelings for Nathan."

"Have you told him about our relationship, and our open marriage?" I asked her. "Is that it, you want me to accept him as your lover?"

"Yes, I told him about us. But no, that won't work."

I was confused. "I'm sorry Amy, but I don't understand what you mean. You want to continue to see him, but not as a lover. Where do you see your relationship going with him?"

"He says our open marriage is proof that you and I aren't really in love with each other anymore. He thinks I need some time apart from you to think through my feelings and decide what to do."

"FUCK HIM!" I shouted. "Don't you see that the possessive asshole is trying to break up our marriage so that he can have you to himself?"

Amy flinched at my outburst. "I know it probably looks that way to you..."

"It would look that way to anyone. Have you talked to any of your friends about this, to get their opinion? I don't think I am being unfair in characterizing Nathan as a manipulative jerk who is trying to wreck our marriage."

Amy looked at me quietly for a minute, then said, "You are right. I should talk to Carol about this and get her opinion. Maybe an outsider's perspective will help me see what to do."

I felt like I was winning the battle, but losing the war. All of the fight went out of me with her response about talking to Carol before making a decision. I wasn't even sure what the question was in her mind. She was already married to me, so the only alternative I could see was a divorce. She must have seen the anguish in my face, because tears ran down her face as she wrapped me in a hug and put her head on my chest.

Her embrace was the catalyst that finally broke me down completely. I began to cry as my arms encircled her.

"I love you Amy. I can't imagine life without you." I whispered.

Chapter 39

Between the fatigue from traveling, and the emotional toll of our discussion, I was wiped out. At 9 o'clock I took off my clothes and crawled into bed. I didn't even have enough energy to brush my teeth.

About an hour later, Amy joined me and cuddled up against my back, waking me up. I lay in the darkness facing away from her without speaking. She put her arm around me and kissed my back, then I felt moisture from her face and realized that she was silently crying. My own eyes teared up, and I sighed softly as I fell back asleep.

The following day was Friday, and Amy was up and in the shower when I awoke. I was going to work from home instead of going into the office, so I went back to sleep. When I woke up again, Amy was leaning over me in her scrubs.

She said, "I love you, Randy," and kissed my forehead, then turned and left before I could respond.

I got up and had coffee, then signed into my laptop. I had several meetings during the day, but none that I had to lead, thankfully. I went through the motions of participating, but my mind was a million miles away.

At one point, a coworker asked during a call if I was feeling alright. I replied that I wasn't, but thanked them for asking without explaining myself. By 3 in the afternoon, all of my meetings were done, and so was I. I closed my laptop and flopped into a chair with a sports news program that I paid no attention to playing on the TV.

I sat in the chair until 7, growing more and more angry. Amy should have been home over an hour earlier. I realized that she might have arranged to talk to Carol that evening, so I made myself wait another hour. By 8, I couldn't wait any longer. I texted Amy, "Where are you?"

I hadn't received a reply five minutes later, so I called Carol.

"Hi Carol, is Amy there?" I asked after Carol answered.

"No, I haven't seen her since the party."

"She didn't call you last night or today?" I asked.

"No," Carol's voice expressed concern. "Randy, what's going on?"

I hesitated, knowing I would probably anger Amy by talking to Carol before she had a chance to, but I had given her the opportunity to talk to Carol first, and she apparently decided to be with Nathan instead.

I spent the next 20 minutes giving Carol a chronology of what had transpired between Amy, Nathan and me since the party. Carol interrupted several times with gasps, and 'no!', ending with 'I can't believe this.'

"I shouldn't have told you all of this before Amy had a chance to speak to you. She needs someone to talk to about it, and I probably just ruined her chance to get an unbiased opinion from you."

"She is going to get an opinion, all right," Carol said, "I'm going to tell her she's out of her fucking mind to risk losing a wonderful guy like you for some asshole who jilted her five years ago."

"I appreciate your support, but I am afraid if Amy doesn't talk to someone other than me who will hear her out on this and get another perspective, she is going to leave me."

Carol calmed down, and said, "Listen Randy, I will hold back on letting her know how I feel about this and give her a chance to present her side of the story, but rest assured that I am on your side in this situation, and I intend to try to talk some sense into that girl."

My phone buzzed, indicating an incoming call. It was Amy.

"Amy is calling, I have to go Carol." I said.

"Okay, I will talk to you tomorrow." Carol replied.

I tapped my phone and said, "Hi."

"Hi hon. I'm sorry I didn't let you know I was going to be late."

I didn't respond. After an uncomfortable few seconds, Amy said, "I will be home in a while."

"Is he there with you now? Put him on the phone." I said without waiting for an answer.

"I don't think that's a good idea." Amy replied. "He is having as much trouble dealing with the situation as you are. I don't think there is anything constructive you two could say to each other right now."

I was about to reply in anger, but what she said hit home. She was stalling him on the answer to the question of what she was going to do too! She wasn't just stringing me along because she couldn't bring herself to tell me we were over. My happiness at learning this was severely attenuated by the fact that she was with him, and not me.

"I will be home in a while." she repeated.

"I may not be here when you get home." I replied.

"Where are you going?"

In truth, I had replied reflexively and didn't have any other plan in mind. I suddenly felt like talking to someone though. Anyone who could take my mind off of this mess. The other reason for the response was a more childish desire to worry her about my whereabouts the way she was worrying me.

I gave her an honest answer. "I don't know. I just can't sit here anymore waiting for you and wondering what is going on."

"Okay, I understand. I will be home tonight, Randy. I am not doing this to upset you."

"Sure." I said, and hung up before she could answer. I was done being an adult about the situation.

I called Jamal, but his phone went to voicemail. I thought about calling Alex, but that seemed like a bad idea on several levels.

First, she was the girl that started our lifestyle change. I didn't think that had anything to do with our current problem, in fact I think it may have prevented a bigger disaster. Our ability to separate sex from love may have kept Nathan from stealing Amy from me outright using sex to manipulate her. I reached this conclusion because I had established that they were fucking, but apparently it hadn't sealed the deal for Nathan as he must have hoped it would.

I did have a history with Alex, however, and regardless of how Amy felt towards her now, there was emotional baggage from both the original misunderstanding, and the actual night that Alex and I first had sex. There was bound to be blowback if I ran to Alex under the circumstances. Plus, I had to admit it would be easy to find comfort in her arms based on my current emotional state, and I didn't know how she was coping with leaving Jamal. No, not a good idea at all to reconnect with her under the circumstances.

I had already talked to Carol, and though she was my closest female friend, she was now living with Brad, and I was certain that I didn't want to deal with him right now. He always gave me the impression that he looked down on me because I allowed Amy to top me in our sexual life.

That didn't leave any other close friends, though the other people I knew would be polite and hear me out if I showed up unannounced to burden them with my problem. I didn't want to do that to any of them, so I decided to go to the bar where Marcus used to work and have a drink. Maybe I could find a talkative stranger and ruin their night with my problems.

I took a quick shower and put on some decent clothes, then headed out. When I got in the car I hesitated, then pulled out my phone and used the phone locator app to find Amy. I decided to make a detour on the way to the bar to see where Nathan lived.

I was able to copy the location of her phone to the map tool and navigate to the address with it. As I pulled up in front I recognized the house from my previous visit using Google Street View. I resisted the urge to pull into the driveway behind Amy's car to confront the asshole while she was there.

I continued downtown, and found parking in the city garage across the street from the club. I walked over to the bar and went in, finding a large crowd there to see the live band that was playing. A bar stool opened up just as I approached, so I grabbed it.

I ordered a saison, and took stock of the people around me. Everyone was there with someone else, or several others. I sipped my beer and watched the crowd for the next hour. Why is it that when you are alone at a bar full of people it seems like everyone there but you has someone to talk to?