All Comments on 'Tales from the Shack: Nobody'

All the jerky choppy writing was kind of fresh at first. Now it's just stale and kind of hard to read. You should really think about changing that. Don't care much for all the super spy stuff either.

A brilliant story and excellent diaspora.

This is sort of boring. I think I'll pass from now on. Couldn't finish this one.

Everyone of them has a vibrant and at the same time sinister aura surrounding them .

I think this is the single greatest "universe" for lack of a better Literotica term , that I've ever read .

Ignore the early trolls , this is gonna blow the tops off of everyone who is a fan of the shack !

I totally forgot i was expecting a stroke story, you had me that engrossed. I didnt want it end

Thank you.

They seem to be getting fewer with every story. This shaft is mined out. Time to move on.

wow. whats this. spies and assassinations in LW. I liked it. Something different for me to read. thankyou

as Pogo predicted and succeeds. TK U MLJ LV NV

Could not finished the first page. Got to the point that it felt like I had known all about spooky already in a previous story. Yeah, the way monster got her and Duarte, I read that already. SOooo , my eyes got blurry my mind stopped assimilating your written word.

Gave you no rating Todd172.

Thank you for the effort,anyway.

AMerryman

Though I Don't think it belongs in Loving Wives.

One of the best!

I think Randi has a new name to add to the next Legends day!

keep this story going if you would please. you will have you asshole bad mouthers. but a lot of people like these type of stories. hell i know i do.

thank you for the privlage to read this.

More sick crap and bad writing that never should be here,Fetish at least.

Thank you. 5 stars. Well worth reading.

NEWSFLASH! The denizens of The Shack from the super spy world. Don't like that? Don't read Shack stories!

Knew ALL about Spooky? You knew ABOUT Spooky, certainly know MORE about her NOW, after this story!

Loved it wow . . .

This is simply fun reading . Please keep these stories coming , I love them . Full marks .

and let the naysayers say "nay" as they wish.

For the rest of us, a new tale from the Shack is always a cause for celebration.

Actually, so far any new story from you has been highly entertaining, and -- like some other authors on this site -- thought-provoking. Which is much more rare.

Thank you.

You draw me in with your characters, and keep me reading with the stories.

Keep writing for as long as you can please, I love these.

5/5

Thanks for sharing a great story.

I can't wait for the next installment. Don't keep us waiting too long or else nobody might pay you a visit! :)

Captivating. But I was actually disappointed that they're the "good guys" after all. A bit too pat. Better if they were simply sleeze.

This is the first time I have read your work and iit was worth it. The dialogue was very similar to the early Private Eye films, dry and to the point. Look forward to next chapter ??

An excellent revealing of "nobody". When I see one of your stories, or really a chapter in a much longer tale, it is the first thing I read. That says a lot because this morning there were three authors I look forward to seeing, you won again and did not disappoint.

Should have been in action or non-erotic or something- no LW anywhere in sight. Very dark story, but fascinating. Five stars.

This is not a LW story. It's just a story about some violent psychopaths. Post it in non-erotic.

the Shack series are one of the best story formats going. A lot of actual human drama from less than stellar segments of society. Flawed characters trying to do the right thing or making the best way forward they can where the ends justifies the means.

All we need now is a visit from MI-6.

Pay no attention to the trolls, great continuation of super hero characters!

Simplyjustdick

The first couple of these were good. As they continue I've totally lost and interest. I could only get to page two of this one.

This universe you have created is as good as any I have read from full length novels and I have read many. I would love to read your work in a full length novel, but I will take these small snapshots you send us from time to time and be grateful.

I loved the story, but I agree that it is in the wrong catagory. One could make a bad TV series with the story line.

This series really pulled me in , need a book or better yet , books about the shack.

Any of your work commercially avalible ?

# 5

Please accept my apology. This story caused me to trigger.

I will refrain from reading your stories because of the unfortunate effect they are having on me.

I will try your other offerings as you are a good writer. This really isn't a loving wife tale though.

Wow.

You are a master at this. It's not very loving wives, but it's awesome just the same.

Go get a proper agent and start selling this stuff - you have the talent.

I was expecting something else - due to the length of time that has passed "The Shack" in the title didn't trigger memories of your previous stories until I read your Forward. I had already written you off as an author who writes for a while then a story line disappears. Thanks for continuing to add another story to this 'universe'. I think one of the underlying attractions of the series are the damaged souls and redemption as they get on with their lives.

Keep 'em coming. Thanks!

to Silentsounds for having the balls to pull back their slam. Its okay SS, a lot of people voted for Hilary......

Great story and series. Hated for it to end. 5*

Thanks for the feedback, it's how I know what works and what doesn't. Thank you for reading and for the encouragement. As to whether it belongs in LW; I get that it isn't standard LW BTB or RAAC fare, but Tommy's life is a sequence of LW and it's consequences. Besides, I post Shack stories to LW to keep them together.

silentsound,

I typically don't delete comments, no matter how badly they paint me, but I will since you asked. I'll leave your request up and this comment so nobody thinks I just deleted it without being asked. I actually do understand the sentiment.

This was a tough write, it's a tough read. I tend to write Noir-ish, but this time it went full bore true Noir. In true Noir, there are no real heroes, there are survivors and victims. There's certainly no glory in any of it. It's damn dark, but then I woke this morning to news of another gas attack on civilians in Syria...

This is a great story. I don't care that it was not "loving Wives" in some peoples view. Tommy and Amber were loving if somewhat broken and of course there were the previous lives they lived that were broken as well.

You character building is second to none. I have read all your stories here and wish there were more.

Thank you.

"to Silentsounds for having the balls to pull back their slam. Its okay SS, a lot of people voted for Hilary....."

Yeah, even more than voted foe Drumpf!

My opinion, you are right up there with Robert Ludlum...let us know if you ever pen a novel. Great story...don't care what category it's in...as long as we can find it.

I was a huge fan in the beginning, Blue Eyes, Pogo & Spooky, Monster, etc. But then due to the intermittent posting, the backaground of the characters faded in my mind, to the point I didnt understand subsequent stories and just eventually gave up on your.

so my expectations werre quite low when I decided to read this, and wow, that was brilliant! I believe you have the seed of a major motion picture of novel in these stories. Who are you really?

Good luck and pls post more. PS-it would help folks like me if you would put a directory of in what order is best to read these stories. I may try it all from the beginning if that was done.

Excellent story. Pay attention people. The man is trying to tell you something. If you believe for 1 minute that organizations like this don't exist think again. Look around at what's going on in the real world: the NSA, the CIA, the FBI and then of course there is the Black Budget that the congress approves each year without knowing what it's for mostly. They don't want to know. It's called 'Plausible Deniability' so they can't be called to testify about something they know nothing about. There is another writer on this site that writes about much the same thing only his stories are about the computer people that gather the information. Does this really happen??? Absolutely!!!!! Is it dangerous for the normal people who live in this country? Under normal circumstances I'd say no unless of course you get some BOZO in the White House that uses information gathering for political purposes. Like destroying the opposition. Another good one Todd. Keep writing. Maybe they will eventually get it.

Go to the other site, the titles there have sequence numbers.

This really tripped the Noir switch. Great story, well told. I love the characters. 5*

I'm not sure from what part of your brain this stuff is coming from, but damn I sure hope there's more of it to come. Have enjoyed all of your characters and plots, all tied in with a hard-hitting non sentimental style. Truly some memorable stuff. Please keep them coming.

After reading this story I'm not sure I can read any of the usual drivel that appears on this site. All the stories in this series are top of the line, but somehow this one really got to me. I don't understand why you don't take this commercial. Stories like these are at least as good as or better than a lot of the junk on the fiction market. I'll keep an eye out for more of your offerings. Keep it coming and stay healthy.

As always.... BZ

Geeze people! It takes imagination, determination and a very thick skin to post on this site. I tip my chapeau to Todd for his efforts.

You really have a great way of developing characters. When the reader feels bad for the wretched characters that die, it means you have done a great job connecting them to the reader. Great job as usual!

another great story in this universe. All i can say is "more". which may be the best compliment i can give.

I already missed these characters...A very good story as all the others of this saga! 4*

You are easily the most over-rated writer in LW. Interesting the first time. But now you've become a one trick pony. Obviously, the low standards of LW work to your advantage.

I wanted to extend another thanks to sbrooks103x and Crkcppr again for editing and beta reading. I have an almost epic disdain for grammar in narrative writing and I don't see the words as much as the story. I can and do will leave out words, sentences or even paragraphs, because they are in my head and I see them there. So I often leave out something critical - like exactly what a blue baby is and why it matters - unless someone points that out to me. As to punctuation, Sbrooks has patiently explained standard use of single and double quotation marks to me so often I think he has a form letter for it. They also put up with my quirks - they don't even blink if they send me something and I shrug and say "That's not how the character thinks/talks/acts. It's not unusual to see 300 or more punctuation corrections from them. And they do it for no pay and usually with no notice. They really make these stories readable. So thanks to them and all the volunteer editors on the site.

Todd172

As always a great story from a great story teller

As this story stands in relation to median quality stories , there's no question it deserves full marks and I have rated it as such. BUT if there was a secondary rating of how well this author has rounded out their POTENTIAL based on experience. I'd rate this at 3 stars tops . Why ? Because Todd172 is full well capable of going pro, should he focus enough to step up his game to next level.

To be pro worthy - the perspective has to go 3rd person omniscient and put the reader in the head of the villains. The Nobody Girl can still be the main character and rooting interest , but the bad guys need more spotlight. Examples are " Homeboy " by Seth Morgan . Any first three Thomas Harris novels with Hannibal Lector as character where H.L. is center stage less then 50 % of pages.

This story had great premise with mishmash of Bourne Identity , Alibi ( with Jennifer Garner and Femme Nikita series . Todd172 has totally nailed creating a dynamic ass- kicking poor man's Lara Croft , but he needs to go to deeper into the dark side to create a worthy opponent for her if he has ambitions of ranking with authors previously mentioned.

Ali needed Frazier. Luke Skywalker needed Darth. Nobody Girl needs a more tangible somebody worthy of standing against and unfolding herself to new heights.

Full marks *****

......Are the fools who can't see the LW that Amber was, and that his first wife wasn't. Duh

I have not read any of your stories until today, but you are talented. Your characters have a "feel" to them. Few authors manage that. 5*

Thank you for the fine read.

Solid, captivating and able to make me care about people I normally wouldn't care for. Excellent writing. Thanks for penning these stories.

no comment required

Todd172, I can't figure out why you write for this site, but I'm very grateful that you do. If you're not already doing so, you could be making a decent living as a writer. I like to imagine that you're a well-known popular author who contributes to this site as a fun little hobby.

I've always subscribed to the "write what you know" philosophy, mostly because I don't have enough imagination to do otherwise. With that in mind, you have either lived a very interesting life or you have a very impressive imagination. Either way, I'm envious.

Thanks for sharing your talent here.

Well met!

Perhaps you should take Nobody serial. Nicely done and others are correct, your style could take you further than this site.

That's pretty funny. The number of views this stuff gets is not high. This guy has some fanboys who pump up the score, but not many people read it. They keep pretty good track over on SOL and those are some really small numbers. Very niche market. That's just the truth, no matter how brutal it is.

is that you (the reader/viewer) KNOW they are going to get ground up by the gears and can't do a goddamned thing to save them. At least you (the author) gave them some respect in the end.

5 stars because i can't give you six. You presented some shitty fucked up people and made me care and want better things for them. Thanks for the ride.

Your statement is like someone asking why the newest Transformers movie or the Fast & Furious 15 didn't take home the Oscar this year !

I guarantee that this year's winner for Best Picture got nowhere near the audience as whatever summer blockbuster got , doesn't mean that it was a better film .

I think I smell some author envy in the air .

...including this one.

to this series. Several great pieces of work and I hope you continue the stories about this "family" of friends and comrades.

Thanks for the hard work.

Woodmanone

....into the lives of those who live on the edge, doing the bad things that need to be done. Thanks for this wonderful backstory on Spooky, and for the love story of Amber and Tommy. The tweak about getting them married was an especially sweet touch!

As others have said, your fans (me! me!) really enjoy the Shack stories, and hope to read many more in the months and years to come!

Thanks again for writing and sharing here!

Awesome job...I was completely pulled into the story. The only niggle I might have is I felt somehow unsatisfied with the ending. I mean it really ended well considering...but I wish this was just chapter 1 with more pending you know?

5 stars here....I do wonder if it should have been in LW though

Any organization that uses tweakers and whores for meaningful functions comes crashing down, and that quickly. But well written.

Actually this is Ch 5 of 8. Ch 4 and 6 deal specifically with Spooky-related themes.

SOL has the sequence, but for your convenience:

Blue Topaz Eyes

Shameless

Monster

Pogo and Spooky

Nobody'

Pogo's Very Long Day

Gun, Gun, Teddy Bear

Behind Blue Eyes

Then I saw your name on the new stories, I knew that I had to read. You are the absolute king of these tales, and you need a freaking book deal.

....with engaging characters, difficult personal circumstances, intriguing stories and events within the major theme and story.

Please don't ever stop!!

Give it a rest. It's just a story about some whores and psychopaths.

Damn good. Hope there is more of the nobody girl, even with a little love interest.

great story as it brings everything together for the other stories about this group. keep writing as the writing is very interesting to read

Great story Bravo!!!

I love picture painting in writing, like a baroque or rococo painting. But I also love the clean smooth highly designed lines of Art Nouveau or Art Deco. That's how your work moves me - so clean and precise, and minimal, yet utterly complete. Thanks. Literotica is lucky to have you. I would happily pay to add your work to my e-library.

I do wonder why you deliver the chapters out of order, it adds nothing to the story, and detracts from the enjoyment. But even then, its a good tale.

Thanks for your time and talent.

The chapters come out of order because that's the way they grew. I never planned this out. I wrote one story; readers asked for another, then another and so on, often for specific characters. So it's grown in a weird fractal pattern. The Shack is essentially an unintended novel of connected short stories at this point and it's still growing. I'm not even sure where the edges of this world are. Perhaps a bit inconvenient and weird, but that's how it's growing.

All: I appreciate all the encouragement I've gotten here on Lit - it's amazing how supportive everyone has been. Even many who don't care for the stories have been pretty positive most of the time.

Todd172

It was a bit too depressing having both Tommy and Amber die, there is no fated to die in a story, there is always another way, marred my enjoyment of Spooky's 'origin story' a fair bit honestly.

You could always try writing non canon alternate endings, one where they get some kind of happy ending?

Just outstanding... with just one line you became my favorite author here...

"I had to ask myself, in what kind of shit-world do I become the one to trust?"

this line made me cry... rarely have I read a line that summed up so very much... it sets a tone that two pages of text would have trouble creating... the shack characters belong in a series of novels or movies...

just outstanding

-jaye-

We can debate whether Tommy and Amber should have died, but I will argue to the death that one couldn't live without the other.

Game of Thrones style, the story has become very real when a character or a person we care about is killed. Someone will stand up to avenge the guilty.

I've enjoyed the mystery of this chapter. I guess I will have to find the how and why behind it

I have no idea why people think the government doesn't do these kind of things in certain circumstances. They do it today, they did it yesterday, and they'll do it tomorrow. I love reading these stories because there damn close to the truth. Maybe Todd did this in an earlier life or something similar. It's called under cover operations.

Sense of the storyline to Pogo, Ken, Monster, and the rest. Great job and hopefully there's more to come from 'The Shack"

Love "The Shack" stories. They are a good read! I look for your name for your newest stories. This is a good background story, like "Monster", and especially after reading "Pogo and Spooky / Pogo's Long Day".

Been a good run with this series. Keep um comin'. Love this stuff........

My friend, I love your stories and your writing!

Love the series. Please keep adding stories to it, especially now that Spooky has located Pogo.

Great addition to the series.

I've just found your writings. You are clearly trying to exorcise demons from your own past (or have too much imagination). I hope writing these stories has eased your mind. Keep well.

Good imaginative story with excellent character development and realistic settings.

This, as with your other works, has legs. Hopefully this will be developed further and/or tied into one of your other Shack stories.

Broken people with strength.

Very hard read, even the 2nd time through. I understand this story is about Nobody, but Amber and Tommy are who make the story for me. I've known both Ambers and Tommys and the way you handled their brokenness is too close.

I swore that I would never read this story again, but the truth of Amber and Tommy forced me to do so. And your writing is superb as usual.

Very dark tale with no real happy ending, but worth every single one of the 5 stars I can give you.

Thank you for writing and looking forward to more from you.

Just "1*" for this literary travesty!!

Or sixth. I have no idea really. Whenever it gets too long between Todd172 stories, I go back re-read my favorites. Which is about all of them. This one might be more favorite than others but I can't tell.

So how 'bout another? Chop-chop...

BTW, I sure wish there was a way for Lit to weed out the idiot Anons. All they bring is shit to the table and I'd sure love to see them all go away. Calling any of Todd's stories "illiterate shit" merely serves to show how fuckin' stupid they are.

wow

I really enjoy your stories. I have read almost all of them at least once, and intend to finish the list. Ignore the annonym-ass flamers. They clearly illustrate their ignorance by the fact that they continue to read your work, even as they declare it "inept trash" and "shit". Its interesting to me that the stupidest people aren't content just to be quietly stupid, but seem compelled to put it on display for all to see.

fantastic, heartbreaking and beautiful. great job. Thank you.