by notforsaleyet
Thanks for not writing. Thanks for going away. Thanks for letting us know that you're and idiot so we can avoid you in the future. Thanks for the urge to vomit from reading the first four paragraphs.
Appreciate that this was only one page. None of these characters are at all likable. So the story kind of sucked. The premise is mildly interesting but all the interesting detail is omitted. The fact that there is no sex didn't hurt the story; the fact that there is no story did. 2 stars. JPR
Dude, you are hilarious! That last line! I nominate that for zinger of the month. Both comments are pretty funny. Sorry, author, didn't read the story. Not my bag, but you did provoke some very funny comments.
Fundamentalist virgin watches porn and turns into a slut; yet somehow doesn't pick up an STI, a prolapsed rectum, or an opiate addiction to the painkillers she'd need from having that much sex with that many partners.
Liked the kidnapping, though. Nothing says erotic fiction like a good kidnapping.
but it didn't work out. It was a little too stupid, especially when you brought the mother and father in law into the picture. So the dad was going to the fuck parties? Was he fucking his daughter or just watching others fuck her?
I am glad it was only one page. 1*
The art of being funny it's one of the most difficults. And nonsense comedy it's even more difficult. This writer tryed it but failed...Nothing resulted, not even the no credible characters. It's true that some initial lines brought a smile, but then all went down fast, as the writer couldn't find a way to get a hold on his story, turning the whole story in a very weak one...As some comment said: "Thank you for making this have only one page"...1*
Yea well I was having a good yawn about the entire thing...I mean that was depressing dude...then you hit us with the punch line! I got a good chuckle out of it....thank goodness I hadn't started snoring yet though
but a lot of true to life facts. Of course it is a stretch for the wife and her sex drive. It does seem I have "heard" about wives and elevated sex drive.
What I find really funny (depressingly so) is that more often it is the wife that has a low libido (sex drive).
Literotica should deliberate about a new section called "Punch-and-Judy theatre"! Thats a candidate for it!!
Is this the second coming of StarStang's GILF story ? Lol
any story today but JPB's and while this one is only in the valley and JPB's is on the mountain top.. still different isn't bad. add.7 to my 2*
Meaning you gave the story an out that didn't leave the narrator sitting alone with his dick in his hand! Thanks.
Don't you recognize satire when you are being clubbed over the head with it? Over and over, one commentator got very close to it with his analogy of the Punch and Judy shows but, unfortunately, veered off on a tangent as he slagged the author instead. My analysis? A wicked story with fun characters. How can anyone miss the purposeful over the top two-dimensional characters of Marie as the nympho wife and I forget his name of the hubby a cuckold in the making, but an eye for making money from his nympho wife? And who can forget his sexy mother-in-law in a Mrs. Robinson like role seducing her rather naive son-in-law. If you have a chance to reread the story using a different point of reference and an open mind you just might enjoy it Enjoy your weekend one and all.
But it seems like he definitely had the opportunity to stop the betrayal or end the marriage when it first started. If he was so OK with his wife becoming a porn star while her mother became his real wife, why shutdown the whore who's laying the golden eggs? I guess its an OK cartoon, just kind of boring.
Why do so many readers lack humor? Perhaps that's why their wives...Oh!
Never mind.
That was really a mess, not even close to your first one. I understand why you quit writing.