by storm_usmc
excellent story really enjoyed would love it to continue but I do hope you have idea's on how to develope their characters
I love all you stories, but at the time I didn't have an account so I couldn't find them again. I stumbled upon your new story and I am so happy :)
Was it just me or did you change from Michael to Brad towards the end of the story?
You asked for help with edits and while I noticed a few errors in the first few paragraphs, there were less as the story continued. Then again, I may have been distracted by reading about Eva. I would have to build a tolerance for her before I could nitpick spelling and sentence structure.
I don't know how someone acting like Eva would work in the real world, but it is a scaldingly hot fantasy to follow along with. Most stories like this would have the Eva character descending immediately into full blown gang-bangs, but this one expertly prolongs the tease to its limit. It remains extremely provocative, without being overly slutty; a distinction that seems carefully considered by the author.
The discipline Jason and the gang must have to not abuse the situation is something else. I love how this story pushes the limits of exhibitionist behavior, making you want to believe it is possible. Now I have to go back and reread the first 2 chapters. Damn, son.
Yes, I accidentally wrote name from another story, I sent in edited so should change soon. Also, last commentor, thank you for recognizing where I was going. I do like pushing exhibitionist behavior without crossing into gang bang or whatever else. It was carefully considered and it's nice when somebody notices.
I’m constantly surprised when men write from a woman’s perspective and it comes across really relatable. You’ve done well!
I felt my heartbeat start to get faster when Eva was dancing in front of the truck.
To feel that much freedom and security simultaneously would truly be exhilarating.
So very awesome, wonderful writing! Please keep it up; you're a joy to read.
The flow of the story is just wow.....no words. The moment you start reading, you jay can’t stop reading till you end the series. The way the things unfold are just awesome.
Bravo, can't wait for Alexa's introduction...
One of the best erotica stories written by a male author that I've ever read. This chapter was funny because I really thought I wanted Michael to win the challenge, but when Jason made his little speech, I was like "Oh, right. Yup, that's actually completely on point." Lol. I'm a woman, and fairly self-aware, so I was impressed that this story gave me an insight into my own psyche, and something that hadn't occurred to me. But I still wish there was a scene where he properly made her beg for it after he 'lost' :) The bike scene was creative and hot as hell though, so well done. Keep it up and I'll keep coming.
- C
You had me from the start and I couldn't put it down until I had finished it. I would love to see many more chapters as they discover each other's limits. I can't wait to show this series to my wife, she'll love it!
And I agree with C, he needs to make sure she won because he let her and he is in charge!
"Lose to win!" I've had to use that philosophy a few times in my life. Hope there's more of this couple!
This was one of the best stories I've ever read. Not only was it so unbelievably fucking hot but it was so beautifully written as well. I love stories that are written in two first person perspectives. This was incredible. The actual storyline was brilliant and the bike part was such a turn on. This whole story was an amazing turn on. I was so wet the entire time reading it.
Fucking amazing.
I'm not normally a fan of more exhibitionist stories but this is one of my favourite stories on the site.
Would comment more but I'm going to re-read the first part.
Love the series. Fantastic! I hope it's not the last one. Keep it up!
More please after that. What a great read and it reminds me of myself and my best friend at that age. We have shared every women we have gone out with and most of our wives, but it takes solid trust and practice. Bravo!
More please! Great story, loved it. Almost thought when they strapped her to the bike they were gonna ride out with her strapped to the bike!
I’d definitely love to see more if you should return to this story. I think it’s great as is, but there’s no such thing as too much of a good thing in my books.
This series is absolutely fantastic! I'd love to be read more if you chose to continue this series.
Oh my goodness, please not the end. These two are so hot I can hardly stand it.