All Comments on 'The Cycle Ch. 01'

Hope this is continued to more chapters. Thanks 5 stars

And I would welcome more.

Your writing skill is obvious. 5 stars, fave story. Please continue.

Best regards, max052

very good for a first timer please keep going and don't pay any attention to the dis from anonymous they don't know what they are talking about

Great storyline, please keep writing and finish the story. Not too bad for a first timer.

This was an incredible story. Please continue with it.

Loved every minute of reading it

Cool story, like the plot very much. I would really love to see a chapter 2 and more on this!!!

Please proofread your next story before you post it!

I enjoyed this story quite a lot and am looking forward to reading more chapters in the future. It has an interesting twist to it and the general setting is further enriched with fun characters who are genuinely passionate about each other. The moms especially effect the whole setting as they seem to have a far superior understand of the young ones' true affection.

There are however some issues you have to address first, either spend some time proof-reading or get an editor as there are quite a few grammar errors, and invest a little more into the backstory and character development to boost the story standpoint.

All in all it was really fun story that captivated me and then enthralled me with sweet love that was long time in the making. Gave it a 5*, equally as reward and as stimulation for further chapters.

Would like to see another chapter. Curious as to the nightmare arc too.

Very intriguing start. Would like more back story about the moms how they became lovers and they set things up. Plus how the dreams fit in

Another chapter please I am also curious about the nightmares maybe linked to a past life or a family curse wink wink

On your next chapter reread your story for spelling errors or ask someone in this community or a friend to read over your work before uploading it. Other than that the story was pretty good for a first try.

I appreciate all the useful feedback guys. As for the spelling issues, I guess I put much trust in spell check. I'll reread future chapters to make sure it doesn't have as much.

Other than mistakes, some of it is just simply the way my thoughts form. That's just how it is.

I'm working on chapter 2 now. There will be at least 3 chapters total, but probably more. Stay tuned!

Great first chapter. You've already acknowledged the spelling.

Look forward to seeing where this will go in following chapters

PLEASE write more, I love this so far!

I cannot wait to read more! Great job!

Great start! Looking forward to the continuation and the explanation of the dreams! Keep em CUMMING! Chapters, that is! HA!

great start

This story is excellent. I love it and look forward to more. Keep up the good work!

So romance is fine great even so I’m not worried about that.

So your first paragraph that I don’t even think I finished was woeful. It was all fluff and blown out, and it didn’t actually tell us much that was going on. You were feeding us the ultra fine details but we didn’t have a framework to put them into context yet. You also fucked up a major point and that made me stop.

So a guy, possibly in the military crawling through the jungle and the birds were loud and he’s COMPLAINING about it? WTF you do realise that first of all the natural bird sounds would cover some of his noise, second if the regular bird sounds suddenly stop then EVERYONE knows something is up, third that crawling in the jungle is not that great as it usually quite dense and you bump plants and these plants are tall and slender so the top waves like a unnatural flag and the leaf litter is loud and the ants are mad. There are other methods, faster, quieter, more stealthy and you arrive fit to fight.

So from that colossal fuckup I figured you were writing about something you had no idea about and couldn’t be bothered to research. Lazy.

Less than one paragraph read so 1 star.

Loved this first chapter, it was amazing. I just hope that whatever you do you DO NOT INCLUDE the mothers in it or the story will be ruined beyond repair then. For now amazing job and 5 stars from me.