All Comments on 'The Dark Side of the Romantic Comedy Ch. 02'

I didn't care for it. Seemed like you must have been high when you wrote this. Hey, you got systech24 to favorite it, so it's all good, right?

You really, really should have left this story at chapter one.

Nicely done! Thanks for writing and sharing it with us. It's a clever twist on the typical rom-com story line.

Btw, I'm amazed at all the dickish anonymous comments we get on this site. Why don't you guys log in so we can find all of your award-winning stories and see what good writing really looks like? It's easy to criticize when you've got no skin in the game. Just saying.

Women age like cheese. Unhappy women get cheesy faster. Kenny will be fucking around on Penny once the stress and discontent start taking their toll on her spirit, her cellulite body, and her worried features. She will end up barren and deserted at best, and maybe a single parent. I think it will be over the second time Kenny gives her an STD, or maybe when he starts with the booze and nose candy, and has pawned the pendant, and the engagement ring she thought Kenny was unaware of. She will stop fucking him, and may leave him when the beatings start. But she will never divorce him, paying her penance, and trying to prove to family and friends that she could at least be loyal to Kenny. She probably already acknowledges that she could never be the wife that Gail is, and will admit that Jason is better off.

The last time Penny see's Jason is years later when she waits outside his office building to get a glimpse of him. Jason will walk past her while she smiles at him and says hello, which greeting he will return politely and keep walking, not recognizing the tired overweight older woman with an expectant smile and sad eyes.

I really enjoyed the first chapter, but this one... not so much.

I kind of felt you took the easy route when the first chapter seemed like a perfect set-up to do something different.

I still think you're a good writer but I just don't think you really challenged yourself with this second part.

It's not very often I get to read a story that has a real life ending. One where the main character doesn't find a hot woman to fall in love with the next day. So few stories show a real life scenario on finding the next great love of your life.

the first part have promise, but this part was uninspired.

The first chapter was much better. That's usually the case with these stories. Writers have a pretty good first half. That's the easy part. The second half was a choke.

Mixed feelings about finish, but this had definite, intermittent sparkle at 2nd reception dinner. Did this linger too long in sackcloth and ashes phase ? It was accurate , perhaps too much so . I remember when Nic Cage was moaning his tale of betrayal to Cher in " Moonstruck", she slaps him HARD and tells Nic " SNAP OUT OF IT" . He glares at her murderously, reaches out ... and rest is Oscar sweeping history.

It's hard to finish 2nd part of story strong. I think this is best conclusion to justthejanitor's resume. He listed some sterling movies as influences in creating the story. If I had to fault the author , I'd say he's so assiduous about balancing the scales in straightforward fashion , telegraphing his literary punches fashion.

In previous movie mentioned Cher betrayed Danny Aeillo for Nic C, but bottom line ;the twosome were meant for each other. Vincent Gardenia the father had mistress. He didn't get divorced and impoverished. Olympia Dukakis read him the riot act at family dinner ( great scene ) and conditionally forgave him based on his decades of good conduct before.

Karma should not be completely denied , it plays out far more often then not in the real world, but it's rarely as straightforward as justthejanitor , who is clearly taking risks, still learning and growing as author) has so far shown it.

Give Kenny a little credit. Draining pond for lost locket was smart move. He and Penny do have more in common then she and Jason. He showed serious initiative and imagination winning her back only to lapse Into Couch Potato cliché. He clearly wasn't CEO ( or CFO like Jason )material but showed definite fireman, state trooper potential. Penny still could have felt loss at what turning back on Jason entailed, but a more nuanced loss.

Close on positive time ! One day when I write my masterpiece , I hope I conjure up characters that hit chords as well as this author. We know Jasons, Pennys, Kennys and Grrrrr ....uppity Theresa in real life. First installment was guilty pleasure page turner. Excellent. This author is like pitcher with serious high 90's mph fastball to be reckoned with, when justthejanitor learns to locate his curveball for strikes in late innings . Get ready to ( gladly ) pay for future efforts.

You're about as big a joke as a commentator as Nic Cage is as an actor. Pretty much of a laughing stock, just like the ending to this story. Big fail.

YAWN inducing drivel.

Today is not that day.

Slampuppy again ? You forgot the requisite Matt Moreau derogative . Must of gotten sleepy waiting for me to post. Step up your stalking game Internet hard man. Oh wait . Your anon , no accountability for you. Carry on. Thx 4 daily shout out. I'll return favor in week, month. Meanwhile keep slamming Redbull and crouched in ready position for my latest blathering and vacuous missive.

Ok , this is a very difficult story to diagram .

The first half was so dark , and his depression was palpable . It literally leaked through my monitor . Very good writing , but it was hard for me to read , I literally felt real empathy for Jason . That was very good writing , I felt it , like the resonance of a rock concert .

Then , I liked the fact that his friend and his father tried to get him out of his funk . I had to do that with a close relative once , not easy at all.

It was all flowing very well until the last scene with Trevor . I think you went a little overboard on that .

As someone who doesn't have 1/1000 of your talent or your courage , and as someone who spouts off on others works here without ever have written anything longer than a grocery list , if I may offer one piece of advice here JTJ . Its the mesh point that seemed just a lil bit off. I think you really should have made this last chapter into two . Then maybe the shock of depressed Jason wouldn't have been so abrupt when he morphed into happy in love Jason .

If you will look at some of the very best stories of this type ( The Damp , Grey Gone by Rehnquist or 500 Annies by qhml1 are two that come to mind in the general area of your storyline ) you'll see that they really delve farther into the weeds than you did. It seems to me , that any story that's longer than the usual 2-3 page LW story , the length you used is difficult to pull off. You really brought Jason's angst to life , but the ending was off just a skosh .

Really should have written his spiritual rebirth and subsequent rejoining society its own chapter .

Having said all of that ( very poorly ) I enjoyed this !

I think you have the " IT " factor to become one of the top tier authors in this category . Lord knows we need some !

Thanks again ! Please post more soon !

A 3 year funk is ridiculous. At the 6th month mark, his friends should have been slapping him in the face. Also, just because she cheated on her fiancee doesnt mean her life had to get fucked up. Kenny showed talent and determibation to win Penny back, no guy will work that hard just to get some pussy, so why would he turn into a couch potatoe now? As someone else said, he would be a good govt employee, either as a state trooper or local law enforcement.

All in all, i give it a 3.

...... but still 5 * .

Liked the plot around Gail's dating disaster with Trevor which nicely set up the finale to this story at Gail and Jason's wedding rehearsal.

Penny had to know Kenny was not good enough for her, surely ... in her heart she had to always know. Poor girl.

Well thought out slices of life brought together by a master .... thanks for sharing.

That entire first act with retelling the party AGAIN from his perspective was essentially irrelevant. That he muttered a lot and was a hermit was established. I did not need to hear the details and that was a waste of pixels.

The time and effort and the hit and miss pattern of dating...I bought it and liked it. It felt far more credible than Super Tits showing up out of nowhere the moment he is lonely and alone. Recovery is a process. So that worked for me.

The Sex Scene...meh. This is a porn site. Scroll scroll scroll Ah...there is the story again!

I understand what people are saying about 'less exciting' than the first part. You had that heart ripping moment in there. Here, the supposed threat of his new fiancé cheating didn't have enough time or words to percolate. Not to mention that a double whammy just isn't your style, so the tension was much less.

Honestly, I wanted to know more about the dad the entire story.

This was the first story I went to and I enjoyed it. It didn't have the high drama of the first scene, but slowly growing romance with sex scene doesn't lend itself to high drama.

It left him in a good place. It was enough.

Why should I enlarge my digital footprint to grade smut and trade snark with randos? This story is fine, by the way, too bad the people leaving comments are basically brain dead.

A good ending, but I really don't think it was necessary to tell what happened to his run away bride. Why? because I think that not even him had any thoughts about her. Sure it took a very long time for him to surpass what happened. I also think like some comment that his father was a figure and deserved to be known better. Someone says that we should "give Kenny a little credit, because draining the pond for lost locket was a smart move", sure, but a youngster kind of move, and after 20 years he still lived like that youngster, dreaming that a good job was waiting for him, and would fall by miracle in his lap, playing video games, eating pizza, not even cleaning the house. The positive aspect of his run away bride? She made the mistake to trade fiancés, but stick to her mistake, like some sort of punishment. 4* for the whole story.

Ignore the naysayers. See if they can do better. 5*

penny getting what she wanted didn't turn out so well.

would like to read a bit of this story, like say from penny's side of it.

Maybe not in such a neat package, but having watched people do the stupid thing and get their comeuppance many times - this rings true! I enjoyed the lack of: over the top fantasy, sci-fi and violence.

I totally agree with dc6370...

For when she found out that Kenny just paid for a replacement. It cost a lot to drain a pond and the reality of a person with his integrity of actually taking the time to find a locket when the solution of purchasing a replacement would be fast and easy. The last laugh in this dark comedy would have been when she realized she wasted her life so her friends could have their fairytale ending in HER relationship. Resenting and hating her friends for their part and herself for flushing away a good relationship for a lie. After a number of years she would feel trapped in a cage of her own making.

I didn't like the game against the ex the second time around. Being told your not welcome and being asked to leave with no contact from the bride would be enough. Why play a game when a boot to the ass would have said "I love you more" for Jason than ruining his mood and bringing up old feelings. Why ruin a special day for someone who shouldn't matter.

love the whole story. hard to read how at the last minute his gf dumped him at the alter but at least it was there and not down the road a few yrs.she had to be a shallow person to do that with someone that she may have had feelings for many years ago but no real contact with for awhile. glad to see that he found someone to trust and love but what happened at the rehearsal dinner without cluing him in was a little to much for me. sure his father was part of it but they should have told him what was going on so that he wouldn't go ape shit over everything. took a chance on him staying for the whole thing he could have just left and called it quits after what happened to him before. keep writing

Thanks!

Melodramatic. Annoying.

You confused Gail with penny on page 3 but still gave you a 5

In terms of writing, this series is well paced. In terms of plot, the set up was credible and the angst and difficulty dating were also credible. As was the epilogue. Five stars.

Ch 01 was 5* but this chapter only got 4 from me. The first page was too mournful and we didn't need to be told how Penny fell into her own little hole. The joke playing on Trevor was also too much.

The tale, unfortunately, can't end at Ch1 since the party Almost Hubby abandoned would be left hanging. If THAT is dropped, then we just have a bitch winning ... and her Bitch Mentor gloating! Ugh!

AlmostSweetie shoulda found the pawn shop receipt for an opal necklace and an old wooden box ... dated a week before the aborted wedding!* Draining the swamp WAS a great invention, though. Kenny could get rich writing scripts for Romantic Comedies!

*Gimme a Break! AlmostSweetie had the necklace for one day, at least six years ago! (and, its around her neck, outta sight most of the time!). How can she tell the difference between a necklace of distant memory and a similar, used one that was dunked in some mud and carelessly rinsed off? Let's not forget that Kenny is a lazy snake! BUT, I WILL remember the essence of Kenny's con ... it IS good!

4*

What a shumck Penny was and she is still married to the loser. She will go to her grave with her dumber than dumb choice. A lot of people who make mistakes move on to better things. So you portraid this educated dumb penny as a person who could not correct her mistake. Even thou she blew off the best thing that ever happened to her . Now I quess they are some people who like to stay miserable .

Absolutely loved the way this story was done. The scene at the rehearsal dinner, at first, really pissed me off that you were going to have life dump on him again. However, I was laughing my ass off at how things turned. At that point I realized how skillfully you made me care about this character. Very well done. 5 stars and I hope to read more from you.

So much better than part 1.

It was like a roller coaster ride, up and then down. On the concave points I felt good, but at the convex moments I felt awful! He really sold me his depression. Excellent writing. This author deserves more attention.

The Trevor angle had me freaking out a bit.

Good story and I can't help but feel somewhat sorry for Peggy at the end. That takes some good writing..

Really enjoy your stuff! Thank you.

Sorry, the second wife to be should have been mature enough to defuse the situation with Trevor before it began. That she willfully did something herself that she so deplored in others, should have warned her husband to be, that she possessed really poor judgment.

Cruelty to others didn't sit well with me.

That's the best I can do. There are parts that are good and parts that are bad. I gave it a four, but that was a stretch. Three stars, if you hold your cursor over it says, "Liked it, good read." That's what I should have given this story, but in view of the other things being posted, "It doesn't suck" seems pretty good. There were nine stories today that sucked and three that didn't suck.

I guess not sucking is the new standard. If you hold your cursor over the fifth star, you see "Loved it, one of the best." That's not this story. Read Oshaw's "Grief." Then read BR1958's "Solace" (you have to go to SOL to do that). Read "The Bar and Grill," "Boston to Birmingham." Read K.K.'s "Brodericksburg,' FrancisMacomber's "The Honey Trap," HDK's "Not Guilty." Those are the five star stories. Then read the stories that are posted today that don't suck. That's the difference. I guess the new five stars is "It doesn't suck."

Great ending that is for use. Our hero found happines.

I didnt like the scene with Trevor. Old boyfriends or girlfriends should stay in the past.

Some would say Penny got what she deserved,but I would say having a better life after she/he cheats on you is the best revenge.

waiting for your new story :D

Good story. Pretty strong ending. 5 stars.

Took this to a 2. No way could that relationship survive her allowing him to come...too bad.

Well done!

overall, I enjoyed the story but there are definitely areas that could have been edited out. The section I would take out first is the whole scene with Trevor coming to the wedding. It is contrived. I think you felt that you needed to put in a scene where Trevor got his comeuppance but it goes against the characterization you have provided Gail. If she was humiliated by practical jokes, I don't believe for a moment that she would find them funny just because they were pulled on someone else.

I am fine with the epilogue as it is but it might have been interesting to do one from a Kenny who wasn't just a cliché. Kenny is just a guy trying to get back his girlfriend. It is Penny who is flip flopping around. So I can imagine an epilogue with Kenny coming home from the car dealership to a wife who is now fixated on a long lost love who she stalks on the internet and keeps reminding Kenny of what kind of life she could have had if Kenny hadn't stolen her back. I think an epilogue like that would bring some of the darkness back to this story.

There is a lot about his stuff that I enjoy. Now for the other shoe. The first chapter set up us readers to expect, or at least hope,that the unusual plot would continue to surprise and entertain. You gave us a man jilted on his wedding day. That was a good idea as it presented you with a great deal of story potential. So what did you do?

You gave us the standard ending. The man suffers for years, rather than getting laid and moving on, which is the other standard next step. Then he met a great girl, almost got shafted again, but managed to dodge the bullet. That was different, but I had to wonder what sort of sadistic prick father and girl friend would cause such agony to someone they loved. Was there any reason to omit our hero from knowing about the "prank"?

Finally, you gave the crowd the part they crave. That's the part that shows the old girl friend unhappy and wishing she kept our hero. How many stories get comments where they want to read how the old wife/girl friend suffered? It's like a drug craved by many readers. "Please write that she suffered horribly!" Sometimes a story will be better in the long run if you do not go where you know the reader wants to go. It may hurt your score, but improve the story. It's difficult to not yield to desires of some the more "vocal" readers because scores are important for the writer's first few years on Lit. I do hope that you keep writing and expand, and write the story that you want to tell, and not what you know readers want and often crave.

There is pace, characters which I love, and story which weaves them together. Thank you. In fact, you might consider placing this in romance. It spins a tale similar to those that find, lose, and then find love again. It's a fine start to a romance. But being a romantic at heart, isn't everything in life a romance, or one gone wrong with their own fatalistic outcomes?

I would have liked more development of Gail. She appears as though she "got" more of Jason's tragic start, than the reader might be able to assume. I loved her just the same.

Please keep writing, as I'll keep reading.

Thank you.

Spyauth

This was a good story! The ultimate in betrayal and humiliation! The best part is that Penny has regret and sees the life she could have had. Serves her right to let an old flame get in the way of her future. Now she's made her bed...and now she has to lie in it!

Gail picked up Jason and made him whole again! I love to hear that Penny is feeling sorry for herself but she has a front row seat to the misery she created for herself! She finally gets to reap what she has sown!

I really like Happy endings. She made her choice, now she is wallowing in her own hell. Good job, thanks.

While I absolutely loved the first chapter, and found the writing here to be exceptional, I was a bit disappointed that this serious and emotionally gripping tale culminated in a farcical scene. I guess it would have been unrealistic for this guy to actually suffer two such rejections, and that is not how I think this should have ended. It's just that chapter one was deep, whereas this chapter was a bit more lighthearted.

I still give it five stars for the quality writing.

The title of this story should be "Much Ado About Nothing."

Keep writing like this and I'll keep reading and giving you 5 stars. Good tension leading up to the trick played on the ex. And thanks for ending this with a glimpse at Penny's folly and regret. Everyone got what they deserved in the end.

I would have liked to see Jason not be quite so ok with the Trevor prank.

Lordslamdawg - How do you figure that Penny and Kenny have more in common than Penny and Jason? I'm not seeing it. They only have their history together. They share no life goals as Penny states quite clearly.

To those who would have preferred to see Kenny successful and happy at the end...why? Not challenging you. I'm just genuinely curious. He was a grade A asshole throughout the story. How would seeing him make good make the story better?

is a bitch......

But it doesn't do for me like the first chapter.

But just off a little bit. Still in the wrong category since he was never married. And you swapped in Penny's name too early. You had Penny at the rehearsal dinner laughing about what Gail had done. Oops! My biggest problem was that Gail used their special dinner to gain some childish revenge on a former lover. Had she really loved Jason she would have known what effect having her ex-lover at their dinner would do to Jason. You simply don't do those types of things to your partner. That's not clever. It's self serving, manipulative and childish. Maybe, just maybe, if she had talked to Jason and explained her plan. But why would you do it under those circumstances? Well written story. Bad story line with really unlikable people.

Like someone else said, that was cruel. OldBearswitch

Hey man this was a really good story because it seemed pretty interesting when I read it and hope you keep continuing your cheating wife tales later man

Trevor deserved the poetic justice he got. He invited himself obviously to cause disruption and therefore it was the right place for it to happen. Giving Gail closure while showing everybody her contempt for Trevor.

I agree with other comments that given Jason's wedding history he should have been given at least a clue as to what happening.

I wonder how Theresa felt about being instrumental in her BF Penny joining her in her descent to poverty?

Keeping Jason in the dark about Trevor and the rehearsal dinner RUINED most of the wedding festivities for him. Taking the joy out of what is supposed to be fun for him was unnecessarily cruel and rude. She should be glad he was quiet about his building anger. I'm surprised he didn't do something preemptive like walk out the door. Knowing his past, she was playing with FIRE. I know the plot device was for Jason to voice how upset he was mere SECONDS before Trevor got pranked, but you spent hours-and-hours making Jason watch Gail shamelessly flirting with her ex-fiance. Otherwise good.

Five stars plus.

Me I'd of gotten up and told Gail to screw it and left her at the dinner with her ex. If she didn't have the guts in the first place to tell her ex he wasn't wanted and shouldn't show up at the rehearsal dinner, then why would I want to marry her?

1000 days and he has still problems with the past??! Are you serious?? And after he finds the right lady he address her as Penny?"....Jason pronounced as he turned back to Penny who was taking in the scene with a look of self-satisfied bemusement." I think you got problems with your own story!!!

1000 days - not quite three years. To some such ss yourself that is way to long. However one must remember the love of his life left him standing at altar for a no account high school boyfriend.

While not same circumstances, I can relate to length of time he spent in solitary, not wanting to be involved in relationship. My hs girlfriend was year younger. Started seeing each other in March my Junior year and went steady until about April my first year of college. Shook me but had summer fling and then met college girlfriend. I was soph she was frosh. Everything was wonderful - love of my life. Early August just weeks before returning to college I had Monday long distance telephone conversation. I lived in Butte, she in Dupuyer. She ended with I love you always and forever. Wednesday mail I was overjoyed to get letter from her until I read it ....Dear Daniel instead of John

Truly crushing part was once I returned to school I would discover over next few months all of my friends were taking her on dates.

When you have opened your soul spoke of dreams told life story it is tough to want to do all that relationship building again. Seems like you just told that history.

Granted while it took me three years before I felt like dating again, Butte had two ''riding academies'' (brothels) stocked with some truly beautiful and friendly girls.

Fact is the top 3 most beautiful and well built girls I ever had sex with worked there. I MEAN NATURAL BREASTS PMOM GORGEOUS.

everybody got exactly what they deserved

the grass is always greener somewhere LOL

it would of been a little bit better if the owner of the new dealership would of been the ex father in law ...... now that would of been out of this world LMFAO

A story that had hardly any spelling mistakes! I applaud that! The storyline was much the same as dozens of others though. I gave it a 4. It was a pleasure to read somthing on this site where the writer had some pride in his work!

Very little chance Jason could have looked past her obsession...this ceremony would have been cancelled.

Well played. Had me worried that for a bit, with Trevor. Glad it worked out for Jason. Penny ended up just where she needed to be. Sorry.

bit "romantic" for me but plausible and nicely written.

five stars thankyou.

Damn, I wish you were still writing on this site!

Extempore

Very good. Realistic. Like your other stories, a different spin on a familiar tale. I loved that he finally met the one woman who could genuinely identify. Thanks for a great read.

Jason spent far too much time in purgatory mourning his betrayal. What he needed to move on is a good dose of revenge.

His friends arrange to beat the shit out of Kenny. Abduct him from the parking lot of a bar at closing, or lure him out of work, whatever.

Take him where he can be found, without cameras. Inflict pain Jase can mash Kenny's nuts if he wants. Fasten something from the wedding (anything with Jase & Penny on it) to Kenny's neck.

Get picture clearly identifying Kenny and wedding. Fade back to the city, alibi's prepared, sap, brass knuckles and disguises discarded along the way..

Edit message "You helped me get this beating" over photo, print out copies, mail them to Penny, family, Theresa, and all involved in the wedding.

Remember all printers watermark output with serial, time and date, so pick a Kinko's in a remote city to print and mail.

This is brilliantly done- beautifully constructed and masterfully told. It's just a remarkable job of storytelling. Just the janitor, huh? You got any stories by the dishwasher? Because now I wanna read those too. Top work, Janitor!

One of the best karmic BTBs ever in LW. So damn good and not to be missed.

You snooze you lose

I felt that the reason for her regret, would have been better of money hadn't been apart of it.

Perhaps him, well not cheating on her, but something close. To sort of show her that he never really loved her as much as Jason had, would have been better.

Perhaps add her finding out, that he didn't actually drain the lake and retrieve her gift. That it was drained for some other reason and found at random.

Glad someone found real love

Kind of obvious. I suppose it was funny but the first two pages were mostly just who he dated. Then he just meets someone with a similar history of course. Happy ending I guess? It doesn't make much sense that Penny would still be with the tosser.

Good story? Absolutely

Comedy? Absolutely not.

Life is full of choices. It's all so full of illusions.

And illusions are like well made counterfeit dollars. They look real, feel real, and you may even be able to pass one off as real.

But in reality, they are absolutely worthless.

Gail was young and confused. Her friends were useless and at a crucial time in her life she took a wrong turn.

The woman in this story wasn't evil. She wasn't a bitch. She made the biggest mistake in the confusion of youth a person can make.

Marrying the wrong person. After reading the story I felt more sorry for her than anything else.

Interesting tale and worth the time spent.

"The woman in this story wasn't evil. She wasn't a bitch. She made the biggest mistake in the confusion of youth a person can make."

The slut was in her mid twenties and graduated from college, at one point does the "folly of youth" excuse finally stop working for women?. And she spent the next decade pining over the man she threw away rather than doing one damn thing to improve her life

How terribly juvenile. I love it. As someone who hasn't enjoyed too many rom-coms, I appreciate the takedown.

@danoctober - Marrying the wrong person was definitely Penny's biggest mistake, one which looks like she'll have to live with the rest of her life. But doing it in spectacularly humiliating fashion for her then-fiancé is on her. She knew his apprehensions about her ex, she knew the risks of having him around, and she didn't have the spine or character to either break off her engagement well beforehand or fend off the ex's advances. The epilogue seems to indicate that she's a weak character rather than a malicious one, but still, she didn't lift a single finger to mitigate Jason's pain in any way when it counted. Agreed that she's worthy of pity, but that's just because Kenny turned out to be a loser. If she had dumped Jason for a successful guy, we wouldn't say the same.

I don't get it though. What was Kenny doing at the rehearsal dinner? Was he Theresa's date? The rehearsal dinner, traditionally, is for the parents of the bride and groom and the wedding party, paid for by the father of the groom. Why would Penny's mother change the day of the dinner without telling the man paying for it? Surely there is some other fine restaurants in town.

Liked it. Keep'em coming.

Somehow, I don't this storyline will make it to Hallmark. 🤣🤣

Glad JTJ got back to Penny’s consequences. But I cannot figure out how (or why) Jason’s Dad, John would pair-up with PENNY to prank Trevor! Last I remember, John thought, with good reason, that Penny was a bitch! Good that Theresa also went down, but it coulda been less Deus-ex-Machina, and involved Jason so he became aware of the karma after his embarrassment.

4*

Could use a little more in the ending directly about Jason & Gail. Penny really needed to be discussed with Kenny.

To me the last page and a half is a LW classic. The sadness and regret the author describes in Penny's life reflects the real pain associated with bad choices. Penny's life is nothing but an endless parade of empty days filled with hopelessness and regret as she morbidly follows Jason's success and happiness while she is stuck with a listless, lazy, man-child with no ambition or future. She fully realizes that Jason has moved on and probably has forgotten that she ever existed. But she will never forget that she could have been Jason's princess and lifelong partner. But she threw it all away for nothing. Heartbreaking.

If I had a complaint it would be Gail nearly ruining their relationship with her revenge. She deserved it (more on the daughter then the guy) but could have clued poor Jason in on her plan so he wasn't seeing a repeat of his first wedding. Also nice to see Penny getting exactly what she deserved. Always love a happy ending for those who deserve it but a unhappy ending for those who deserve it too.

Meh, couldn't care less about his relationship with Gail. Overall a disappointing story.

So Jason goes ahead and gets married to someone who, knowing his past and how badly it affected him and for how long, is so insensitive as to have her ex to the wedding parties and rehearsal and act like she was totally enthralled with him over her fiance. His father, knowing how badly it had affected his son, was in on it. She was getting revenge on someone whose biggest mistake had been not believing his daughter was capable of the things she was doing.

I wouldn't be marrying that woman and don't look at the future as having a happy ending for Jason.

Writing Gail's act of revenge, the pain it caused her fiance and her insensitivity to that into the story ruined it from my point of view.

It took Penny a decade to figure out she might have been wrong about her moron ex. I think any other normal person would have figured it out after the weekend. Better she did let Jason go, she obviously lived in a different world.

Now the nightmare's real...and I won't feel

A thing.

eh it wouldnt have mattered the only reason jason and his new with have that type of marriage is bc it isnt penny. if they had married she would be doing kenny on the side making the marriage shit. to bad she cant figure out the its her not them but such is the human life

Well, lucky Jason was allowed to escape the countrified marriage trap. Poor Penny though stayed to be drugged down to the lackluster life of her country bumpkin boyfriend Kenny. Isn't she the lucky-one ?? LP

Wow Just Wow! This author attempts with each story to our cuckold the one previous? And what was that 1000 days and nights bulk shit fuck me is this guy a 12 year old Girl? That Jason is an achiever at anything is a fucking miracle because all I can see is a scared little boy whose petulant, pathetic and fucking needy as HELL.

The last page with Penny and Kenny was great and displayed how soul crushing her life had become. Karma will continue to exact its price for many years. The prank with Gail and his dad, that was odd. Her prank could have completely still happened with zero impact by either (a) not letting Trevor flirt or touch her (that made zero sense why she allowed it and did not set firm boundaries) and (b) why not tell Jason, something at least ambiguous, like yeah he is here, he invited himself, he is a prick, I have zero interest in him, yeah I see how he is hitting on me and he can drop dead, don't worry all is good, I am going to play a prank on him, but will leave it as a surprise for you at the rehearsal dinner. Period. What she did torturing her husband with a known history of painful betrayal right before a wedding is just nuts. Is she really that tone deaf? Really that clueles? Wtf? Look he was better off without Penny. She is a cheater. Yeah she got manipulated but she bought into Kenny's and Theresa's bullshit. She chose to go back to her old flame. At least she wasn't married. She would have cheated with Kenny post marriage for sure. He had a strong atavistic pull on Penny. Like a plot straight out of Sweet Home Alabama with a Graduate ending. Was creative. She chose poorly and karma is going to keep crushing her slowly. But wow Gail. Why was the prank needed? Why keep Jason in the dark? He was hurting badly. Took her that long to notice it? Really? No need to let Trevor play his flirting games. Why would Trevor want her anyways. She was an embarrassment to him. Jason may have magnified some things but who can blame him based on his history? Gail may have been great up to the point and after the prank, but her single-minded behavior that allowed her to ignore and by lack of action, torture, her fiance is scary. I know she wanted payback but communicate with Jason and manage his concerns before blindly almost causing an unintended catastrophe.

Oh wow…I was really loathing Jason and his wallowing in pity for years…but he grew a pair, got lucky and Penny gets to live the shitty life she deserves. I would love it if Jason owned the car dealership and ensured Kenny stayed unemployed.

-1 for Gail's stupid prank, not letting Jason know that she has zero interest in Trevor and actually despises him, and not shutting down thr flirting and touching. That was moronic. She knows Jason's history. Tone deaf is right.

Very good story, very entertaining. I enjoyed it, don’t know what all the naysayers are bitching about.

5 stars.

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

incredibly insightful. loved it.

And the writing wasn't bad, either.

MLJ

You needed Gails flirting with her ex for a plot device I suppose .

Good writing but why is it that everyone seems to think that its acceptable for the women to have their exes attend the wedding? Is it only for the plot or is this acceptable in the US? I.e. who the f_ck marries a woman who does that?

I vote but the score never seems to change, what's up?