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Click herePenny sniffed before answering, her voice still quiet and uncertain.
"I...I don't know, I think maybe I'd rather see the Western."
Betsy's voice turned incredulous and she gave a half mocking laugh. "Seriously? You're kidding right? A shoot-em-up? I mean I had no idea that you liked westerns."
Penny pressed her lips together and looked to her husband, sitting cross legged on their old carpet amongst the trash and garbage he allowed to accumulate around him, completely absorbed in his video game as he furiously manipulated the controller. And then she looked back to the image on her computer screen, of Jason and his perfect little family standing happily in front of their gorgeous home.
There was a deep sense of melancholy with a touch of sentimentality in her voice when she answered, a tone that was pregnant with regret.
"Betsy, it's not...it's not that I like Westerns," Penny choked out. "It's...it's that I really, really hate romantic comedies."
A slow burn, but a full 5-star burn it was.
Girlfriend, at marriage rehearsal no 2, could have tipped Jason off and been a bit more gentle. Then again, half the punch line would have been missing if she had done that.
I’m glad this was his last story. I only have so much tolerance for effing wimps.
I agree with other comments, its a continuing theme in your work, men with no backbone, pride, self respect, decisiveness. I know your a good writer and you have to create circumstances to work the plot but its too depressing.
Good writing. Thought both chapters were good. Would give a slight preference to chapter 2. Did feel it was worth 5 stars.
It's not your best. I found it disappointing that at the very end Penny is shown as having regrets of missing out on a happy family and not lost love and what she had done to her groom.
I had hoped this second chapter would redeem the weakness of character that Jason exhibited in the first.
Alas -- Jason continues throughout to show very little evidence of having confidence (self-respect?), backbone, or worldly wisdom!
The writing is technically quite good, but I find the story disappointing. I don't like giving low rating, but I get little enjoyment from reading stories whose MC's exhibit meekness, timidity and poor life/coping skills, especially when those traits still remain at story end. (2-stars)
Good writing but why is it that everyone seems to think that its acceptable for the women to have their exes attend the wedding? Is it only for the plot or is this acceptable in the US? I.e. who the f_ck marries a woman who does that?