All Comments on 'The Date Ch. 01'

But you need a good proof reader.

Yes, I agree that you need either a proofreader or, better yet, could benefit by upgrading your writing skills. You have a very good imagination for writing erotic stories.

Good read .... a little quick though....and yes someone to proofread. But this was awesome work ... cant wait to read ch2!!

I stopped reading after this: "I pick you up at 8 as agreed". Instead of drawing me in, first person stories makes me feel like an intruder in some private communication.

I don't need perfect writing to understand what the writter is trying to say.

It's a Really hot story. Please continue i want to hear more about this fun couple.

This story could have DEFINITELY been so much better!! I am a super stickler when it comes to grammar and english in general! If you're going to continue writing, PROOFREAD and, PLEASE write in 2nd or 3rd person NOT 1st person!!!

Write the follow up story, in the park.

And then another.

I liked the story and actually wished I were Becky, can't wait to read more