All Comments on 'The Deal Ch. 09'

From here is where a good story becomes great. Growing, and loveable characters and a (semi) plausible descent into debauchery. Yes it could have happened quicker, but a slow burn works better for the characters as created.

What the hell, man? Were the parts originally this short? I shouldn't have to wait a whole week just to read something that takes ~5 minutes to get through. And don't say that it "takes time to polish it up" because the amount of errors present is ridiculous, especially considering how long it takes between chapters. It was finally getting good this chapter and BAM you stop short again. Come on.

Thanks for your very nice comments. You made me chuckle with "semi-plausible." Yeah, it sometimes takes a leap. I hope you continue to enjoy it as things get more and less plausible.

Thanks again.

When I went to submit this Wednesday night I noticed the length and knew I was in trouble. I agree - it is too short. I don't remember getting any grief the first time around but still it is short. I did think about adding a scene at the beginning where Sue went home and jumped Jeff while she was doing the laundry, but I really don't want the focus on anybody else but Matt and Diana for now. I definitely wanted to end with the scene as it was here since again Di is taking a huge step in the relationship. Also I'm still hesitant to change it much from the first time it ran here. In the end, I left it as it was and waited for the justified "too short" comments.

Didn't take long.

As for the errors - I have yet to write something and not find at least one error which always pisses me off. Fortunately, I find at least one if not more errors when I read King or Cussler as well so I've learned to relax. As for many errors, well, I'm still getting more positive comments praising the error free quality over those stating there are mistakes - mostly stylistic I bet, and I can live with it. In the end, I'll keep listening to the editors and publishers who are paying me and consider me a clean writer. I'll keep editing and proofing.

Thanks for reading and leaving a comment.

I had another anonymous email lamenting the addition of the boys on the vacation and fearing a huge orgy. I got A LOT of this the first time the series ran as well.

Mild spoiler here: at this point the first time it was published "The Deal" was a very popular series, and I was having a lot of fun (both writing and with fans), so I wanted to pay a little homage to Literotica for being the home for this series. As I mention in the Jamaica chapter - I was paralleling the first story I ever read here on Lit as a thanks both to Lit and that author. That was my focus.

We do have some territory to cover on that slippery slope Matt and Diana are on before the vacation starts but please keep an open mind.

That's all I'm saying.

Other than that: good or bad, thanks for the comments and caring. I truly appreciate it.

moving slow, but, very good.

this is a fantastic story. don't like all the characters that are coming into the story. you have to find a story line for them. the original idea was great. I prefer not to see Matt's friends or their mothers get involved. Let Matt and his mom do their thing alone.

i hope this remains a matt and diana story. otherwise im wasting my time on this. i hope diana remains clothed throughout the vacation in regards to matts friends. i really didnt want to see them added. nor should them be included in anything incest-wise.

Fucking teasing bitch needs to just get rid of the shit and fuck him.

You mention Peter Towers and a story series titled "Further Along a Stranger​ Request", but no story series was in his list.

I can't wait to see what happens with the girls night, and how the deal may become known amongst the group. Hopefully there are many happy sons to come/cum.

Your story is very good and I like the turmoil that Matt and Di seem to be struggling with. This recent chapter was disappointingly short and lacked a direction. The other characters have the potential of changing the story away from mother/son as they are brought up more in the story. Please keep it more as a mother/son struggle because it keeps it believable.

(1.) thanks, slow and steady wins the race :) or so I've heard.

(2.) At this point I was developing a world for Matt and Diana as nobody is an island in of him/herself. At the core - it will always be Matt and Diana (kind of - no spoilers here but you'll see.)

(1.) I really had a specific focus in mind for Jamaica not related to my characters actually. I explain it in an author's note starting that chapter. The three families intertwine but at the heart stay as three separate families. It's my hope that while Matt and Di are the main characters, readers can fall in love with the Lynns and Hamiltons as well and enjoy their escapades.

(2.) I give Matt a lot of credit - I would not be so restrained. Both Diana and Matt have the best intentions but Diana's past is catching up to her pushing her buttons. Enjoy.

I just checked and Pete's story is still there entitled "Following on from a Strange Request." It's a six part series. Here is a link (I hope works - if not try copy/paste): https://www.literotica.com/s/following-on-from-a-strange-request

I hope you find it and enjoy it.

Hey welcome back! Thanks for the comment. Very perceptive of you. I hope you do enjoy the girls night out. Take care.

Great comment and thanks. Honestly, I was excited to take on more characters in a sense of making it more real but still wanted the focus on Matt and Diana.

I do apologize as the chapter really was too short. I really should have built in more at the beginning.

Thanks for sticking around and I hope you continue to enjoy the story.

great story dude

More fuel on the fire I see...way to go!!!

When will Matt get to make love to his Mom?

Hard to keep him a virgin.

You are a man of few words - but I do love those words. Thank you very much. Always glad to hear you are enjoying it!

The dynamics of the characters just lend themselves to heating things up all the time. Glad you enjoy it so much!

Thanks again prop69 - as I mentioned before - I love Matt as a character, he is such a good and patient guy. I would never, ever have that much patience which is larger why it's him and not me!

Thanks

I looked for his story and could not find it. It turns out the title is "Following on from a Strange Request "

Hi Mgenette:

My apologies to you (and to Peter!) I love his work but I can never seem to get that title quite right. Thank you so much for putting here.

I hope you enjoyed the story.

LF

so my wishes cannot alter the storyline. but

This started as a personal motivation attempt by a mother for her lethargic son. So far we have witnessed a slow, step by step, incremental progression and mutual awakening of the mismatched couple. Yet, occasionally a potential add-on slips in.

I hope this series remains the tale of Mat and Diana. If you must open it up to include the other mothers and sons, please do it in a new and separate series. Even then I think it would be fun to be an observer during the singularly individual family units.

Less is more?

Mathew has a truly loving, experienced role model in his mother. The communication between mother and son is logical and believable. It is gratifying to see that the mother realizes her son is maturing and that he respects.