All Comments on 'The Fake'

Too many typos. But more important, if she didn't want to blow Norm, guess what? She didn't have to. Women aren't going to just give in after some wheedling by an asshole. Sigh. But I suppose chapter two will have Norm joining in. Or chapter three. But really ... Spare us, OK?

I'll admit it, I'm one of the people who gave the original a 4, but this is definitely a 5.

... it still needs some TLC from an editor for the typos, and other errors.

For instance: "... there were several people serving drink and a handful of well dressed handful of customers in sight."

And there are others - lots.

Gave it three stars, though - hope to see more.

If you read a story such as this and all you see are the typos, then you are on the wrong site. Great story!

Although we did have "it's" for "its". I saw a good idea, but lack of any character definition. Who are these people? If they're students, what are they studying? What are their day jobs? How come Norman isn't brought up for sexual harassment? If Jennifer is the hottest lesbian around, how come she hasn't made a play for Samantha? Unless Norman is really Jennifer's wingman, setting up Jennifer's targets and then bailing. Make a story out of it, not just a stroke job (not that I mind a good stroke).

This was one of the most erotic stories of seduction. I wish you would write a sequel about Sam's turn on the stage. Don't worry about all the negative comments regarding typos. It is something you should work on, but you story is magnificent. Thank you.

Of course I had a typo in my review. Hopefully, you can overlook that. (smile)

Where is the second part...?

this feels uncomplete

please please let there be another chap of this

Pretty arousing situation but it didn't feel real. The main girl felt uncomfortable that a girl suggested she was gay, and all of a sudden she's happy being eaten out in public and then jumping on stage. Why would they all go in a cab together past the city, it feels like it's a bit cobbled together unfortunately.