The Females of Wadi Ya Noh.

And so, handing me Miss Withenshaw's pen, Claudia instructed me, "Sign here, David."

Upon my signing the document, Miss Withenshaw announced dryly: "Claudia and David. I now pronounce you ... man and wife."

As soon as my name was 'safely' on the document; before the ink had even had time to dry, by means of celebrating their ecstatic joy, their blissful happiness, the females of Wadi Ya Noh emitted such a shrilling, screeching, ear-splitting, ululating wailing, that eclipsed anything that I had heard from them so far. And, that was saying something.

"My God!!" exclaimed Miss Withenshaw, frantically pressing the palms of her hands over her ears, in trying to shut out the horrendous, unbelievable uproar of that God-awful din.

Incredibly, the shrieking pitch of the triumphant, jubilant, celebratory ululations of the females of Wadi Ya Noh, actually escalated another notch, when Miss Withenshaw, Claudia, Meena, and myself - still (almost) naked - got into the back of the police Land Rover.

And their awful racket seemed to get louder still, at seeing Claudia maliciously snapping shut around my wrists, the handcuffs that were attached to the wire separating screen, thereby ensuring me a most uncomfortable, most distressing journey, to the airport at Wadi Ya Wan.

For, this time, it was a symbolic gesture, that was not lost upon anyone there - least of all, me.

What a 'Reception'! What a send-off, from the females of Wadi Ya Noh! All that was missing, was the confetti.

I was, now - to all intents and purposes - officially married to Claudia. And we were going to England, to live in my house.

And, Meena, "blessed mother" of Claudia, was now my mother-in-law - and she was coming with us.

"Well ... Congratulations, David," said Miss Withenshaw sardonically, sitting next to me.

Then, incredibly, I heard a chuckle escape Miss Withenshaw's lips. I couldn't believe it; thought I must have misheard. But it had definitely been a chuckle; her note of hilarity, unmistakable. What the hell has she got to laugh about? I wondered peevishly.

A moment or two later, I found out. When she chuckled again. When she could no longer contain her mirth - and didn't bother trying. When the 'real' Miss Withenshaw, revealed herself for the first time.

There was a distinct undertone of wry, dry, mischievous humour colouring Miss Withenshaw's plummy voice, when she added: "Oh, and David ... Your tie needs straightening."

The Females of Wadi Ya Noh continues - and concludes - in Part 2.