All Comments on 'The Game'

Hot Hot Hot. I want that, can't wait to play this....

Will definitely try this.

... and play safe! :D

Can't wait to see what happens next!!!

Ah, so hot, so well written. Love it.

You MUST continue this! What a great series it would make. I usually look through literotica for stand alone stories as so many have chapter after chapter, but this one demands further editions!

I especially loved the whole story about Gorgeous -- even though it ended so sadly. Very moving stuff.

I've never asked an author to continue with his/her story before, but today that's about to change: Please continue with this. I still want to know what that code she was trying to decipher means, and how he ultimately ended up in jail, and if she's gonna help him get out, and he hasn't fucked Naomi's pussy yet. C'mon; keep it going, bro.

P.S. gave you 5* -- of course.

They're much appreciated. Now that I've just finished missing the deadline for the Valentine's Day contest :) I may indeed come back to this one, so stay tuned.

But what was in the USB drive?

That was the hottest story I've ever read.

Excellent... almost film noir, I'm

Afraid I imagined Idris Elba in the lead as Robert Mitchami's white !

It most definitly, sadly, is unfinished.

Don't finish it !!

They're much appreciated, and glad you enjoyed the story!

Very hot and well done. This tale exemplifies why erotic fiction is far superior to video porn. Thanks CyranoJ.

Dear CyranoJ what you wrote got every nerve aroused to the hilt and almost out of breath shall be definitely awaiting your next installment on this story do finish it it is definitely a powerful story that needs its end please do keep writing till the end of this story

So I'm going to go ahead and criticize you now:

It was too descriptive. I like the way you describe stuff, but there was too much redundancy for my liking.

You didn't murder your darlings. You showed us Naomi trying to figure out some puzzle, but it had nothing to do with the story. And there's nothing erotic about dunking some poor girl's head in a disgusting public toilet. I get humiliation. But you took it too far. Murder your darlings.

I like the way you write Cyrano. But there's too many rookie mistakes in this story for a writer of your calibre. If I could back in time, I'd change the rating I gave you to four stars.

Some fair criticisms there. In particular there are some bits dangling off the story that were meant to come into play in later chapters when I was still planning on a series that in retrospect could stand some trimming.

Simply the very best. Although it does seem to progress along a little too quickly vis a vis the therapist. The submission/domination dynamic is just wonderful though

Quality just quality !

Ithankyou. :)

I was as achingly wet as Naomi by the time I finished reading. Well deserved 5*

Thank you!