All Comments on 'The Heated Storm Ch. 03'

This isn't the edited version.

It is still confusing a bit. have you got someone to help you edit your work and perhaps you should get a proof reader as well. I know with my story i have on here without an editor or proof readers i would be in trouble.

I agree with the others. Some one to edit and correct grammatical errors would help a lot. I do like the story! Keep going.

I think you put yourself down in the last chapter saying that you should clear up the point that you're a bad writer. The stuff you need to fix is easily done with an editor. I think you are doing a good job of creating interesting characters. I thought it was cute when her sister called her before she could dial. I look forward to seeing where the story goes. Get the help you need and keep writing.

I hope there will be more!