All Comments on 'The Meeting'

If you want to write in second person POV - OK - but you actually write in first person and this dilutes the impact of your story. All we get are two anonymous characters who we don't care about. Only use 'you' when you want the reader to be 'you'. It is a POV after all.

How can 'I' know what 'you' get from the valet as 'I'm' not there.

Not bad. Not sure what Lloyd is talking about. I was able to follow you but I think you should stretch your stories out longer and take some more time with them.

And very weak. Good luck on future submissions.

I would have you clean off my cock with your mouth after you had it in your ass. It is the least you could do.

Really bad, repetitive chanting "you, you, you". Just a waste.