All Comments on 'The Misadventures of the Green Family'

and I look forward to reading more as others in the family get involved.

... you need to use an editor. If you had done so, that editor would have found that Kelly "feeling the buildup to an intense organism" and suggested that it be changed to "feeling the buildup to an intense orgasm".

With a few minor exceptions, I felt this was a well thought out, very descriptive story. I could feel the excitement.

Since Kelly and Carol have had an orgasm,and enjoyed having sex together and now feel comfortable making love to each other, they should bring dad into the mix. Let him enjoy the fruits of his daughter and wife. A one on one coupling at first with his daughter and then a three way affair with his wife and daughter. Kelly has her mom and dad lusting after her and she should allow them to pleasure her. A really good story and hope to read that dad gets his chance with Kelly. Thanks for the good story...Rich

Hi. The story is very hot and I will continue to read, but I did agree with the one comment about your needing an editor. Why? Simple mistakes in spelling & phrasing that an editor could've caught easily, punctuation errors and at times, you changed tenses, from current to past tense [ most stories should generally be written in past, as we are being TOLD about the action, rather than SEEING it ] But there's good potential here. PM / Contact me if you'd like some help or advice. I've got 218 stories out here, so I've written my share.