All Comments on 'The Moonlight Gaze'

I really liked how you created more meaning towards this story, and delved into your character's pasts more. I'd like to see more like this from you, please.

Really nice story well written brought a rush of blood to my cock

i really love this, but i was hoping she would end up with the other girl other than her girlfriend ahaha

I've read both stories and the potential is there for an interesting series, so I've given you three stars for each. However, sorry to be adverse but you really do need a good editor to sort out the numerous grammatical and spelling errors. As an example of the latter, several times you wrote about "...[so many] minuets..." A minuet is a 17th-18th century dance: a passage of time is a "minute". Perhaps that was just a typo but it wasn't the only one. And your grammar is very shaky. An example: "...shooting Natalie with a concerning expression..." should properly read: "...I gave Natalie a concerned look..." Good grammar and spelling are a writer's tools and should be used correctly, otherwise even the best story can be made to look pretty bad.