The Paladin and The Healer

She buried her face in his chest. "I want you so much."

"Do you need time? I will wait. I will happily wait as long as you need."

"No, I cannot wait, I might burst. But..."

"Then please Mary, my sweet brave beautiful girl, please stop talking."

She tried to fumble at his shirt immediately, but he brushed her hands aside gently and said, "Not yet, Mary. You have already undressed me, it is my turn to have the pleasure."

Slowly and deliberately he began to open the buttons down the front of her plain, wool dress. As his fingers worked he nuzzled and kissed over her ear and down the side of her neck. He could feel the tension in her shoulders and knew she was standing with her fists clenched. So he was patient, he took his time and opened each button slowly and carefully. Finally he could slip it off her shoulders and let it fall to pool around her feet. She stood dressed only in her shift and her own glory. He bent to kiss her lips softly and felt her trembling. He pulled back, intending to ask her if she was certain she did not want to wait and she reached up to cover his eyes.

"Please, do not look at my face. Please, I... Please just do not."

It seemed a small enough request if it made her feel more comfortable, and it gave him a wickedly wonderful idea.

He put his hands gently on her hips and guided her to sit on the edge of the bed. Then he knelt in front of her and lowered his lips to kiss the top of each of her spectacular breasts. Slowly, as he kissed her throat he brushed the straps of her shift off each shoulder and pulled it down. Then lowered his mouth to kiss and suck tenderly on her nipples.

He was rewarded by a soft, "Oh, Lucas" while his hands raised the skirt of her shift up to her hips.

She was still tense so he bent further to press soft kisses on her thighs, first the top, then gradually along the insides. Her legs spread slowly to accommodate him.

He leaned in closer and pressed his lips to her wet sex.

"Lucas," she said in a whisper, "What are you... oh my. Oh my."

He chuckled and slipped his tongue deeper into her wet labia, letting it slide in and out slowly.

"No, Lucas, you... oh my. Why... Oh yes, Lucas."

Teasingly he raised his head. "I will stop if you do not find it to your liking."

"No, no, no, do not stop." Her words and her hand in his hair urged him to return to his ministrations. He leaned in close and spread her open with gentle fingers so he could push his tongue even deeper in.

"My darling, that feels... oh my... oh my... yes right there."

He pushed in firmly and closed his lips around the nub of sensitive flesh. Immediately she became both louder and less coherent. Her head arched back and she pressed against his mouth.

"Yes, yes, oh Goddess YES. I can... OH LUCAS YES."

Her body tensed and she gushed gloriously into his waiting mouth. She was incapable of anything but spasms and moans as she floated in the glorious pleasure. Lucas felt quite smug as he trailed his tongue along the inside of her thigh.

He stood and loosened the laces of his shirt so he could pull it off and toss it aside. He had to fumble a bit but he finally worked out the laces of his britches and started to push them down. He saw her watching him with a worried expression.

"Please tell me you still want me, Lucas. Please. I know I am not... Oh sweet Goddess. Oh yes, come here you beautiful beautiful man."

Lucas smiled at her praise and let her move to the center of the bed before lowering himself down alongside her. Her hand went immediately to his stiff shaft and she squeezed it possessively.

"I want you so much, Lucas. I need you in me."

"Soon, sweet girl. We will go as slowly as we can." he whispered as he slipped onto her.

"Not too slow, I need... Oh yes, Oh Yes. Is that... no there is... oh, more please."

Lucas took his time, wanting her to enjoy the feeling of him pushing in. It was difficult because her hands and her voice urged him on. She was not afraid, she kept saying, and there was no doubting her.

"You are beautiful," he whispered.

"No, no, I... oh my."

"I said you are beautiful, Mary."

"Oh yes, Lucas thinks I am... beautiful. Lucas thinks... wants... yes, yes, oh yes!"

She began digging her nails into his back as their movement began to speed up. He pushed in deeply and she clutched him with her body and her arms. "Love me, Lucas, love me. Let me please you, my darling. You are glorious. You are... OOOHHHHH"

They kissed hungrily as Mary floated in rapture again. Lucas slowed to let her catch her breath before beginning to thrust with deep slow movements, seeking his own release. He felt her raise her legs and lock her ankles behind his back. She lifted to him, taking him in even deeper. They gasped and moaned together, until they both exploded and he poured his seed into her.

He buried his face in her neck as they slowly recovered.

"I should have shaved before we did this," he said, hoping for a smile. When she made no response he raised his head and looked down at her.

"What is wrong, Mary?" he asked when she turned her face away.

"Was I... was that... Did I... please you?"

"Yes, sweet girl, you did. It was wonderful. You are a wonderful lover."

She nodded uncertainly, her face scrunched as though she was fighting tears and she tried to raise her hand over his eyes so he could not see her.

He sighed. A lifetime of believing you were ugly could not be brushed aside by making love once, even when it was a good as this. It did not matter, he would show her the beauty he saw in her. Instead of speaking he kissed her lovingly and rolled onto his back. As he expected she rested her head on his chest so her face was hidden. He stroked that back of her neck and felt her relax.

"You must be getting hungry," she said soon. "And you did not get your bath."

"Actually, I bathed in your bath water before I threw it out." He shrugged. "I have had much more unpleasant baths, believe me. I could certainly eat, though. Neither of us had breakfast and it is past lunchtime now. You are delicious but a man needs more than... that to sustain himself."

She slapped his stomach lightly. "You are horrible." He could practically feel the burn of a blush on her cheeks. That was better than the nervousness she had been showing.

"Yes, I probably am."

He could feel her need to say more but knew she would say it when she was ready, so he continued to touch her back gently and waited.

Suddenly she pulled herself up and crawled on top of him so she could cup his cheeks in both hands and kiss him lovingly.

"Thank you," she said softly. She looked down at him, directly into his eyes and let him see her face. It was a brave thing to do. There were tears in her eyes. She never cried when she was afraid.

"For what, precious girl?"

"For protecting me. For accepting me as I am. For caring for me even though I am deeply flawed."

Lucas smiled. "Thank you for saving my life, little one."

She buried her face in his neck so she could breath in his scent. "Yes, you need a shave, you are very scratchy."

He chuckled and raised her hand to kiss her fingers. "Anything my lady requires." She tightened her arms around him, squeezing as hard as she could.

"Are you hungry? I will be happy to fix a meal for you if you are hungry. I would not want you to endanger your recovery."

"Well, as much as I would prefer to keep you in bed I would enjoy something to eat."

"I am glad you said so, because I am very hungry. Being a lusty woman seems to have increased my appetite."

Lucas chuckled. "Yes, my sweet girl is a very lusty woman, I am quite happy to say."

The blush was still burning on her face as she rose to don her robe. "You are terrible."

"If it makes me terrible to take pleasure from your blushes, then yes, I am terrible."

A bit of silliness ensued at that point. Lucas pushed to sit on the side of the bed so he could pull on his britches. Mary insisted that he stay where he was and relax, since he was still recovering. She tried to push him back down on the bed. He resisted, saying he was going to help her make them both a meal. She tried to push him down again, and he grabbed her wrists and pulled her down with him. She ended up laying on his chest and he kissed her ferociously. But when he pulled open her robe and began to tickle her the mood changed. Mary squealed and giggled like a girl and Lucas had to hold her down on the bed to continue. When he finally relented she repeated that he was horrible.

"Yes, I am, I deserve to be punished. Oh, I know the perfect punishment, you should make me sleep in bed with you tonight. That would be terrible."

"It would be terrible for me if you insisted on tickling me the entire night."

"I have plans for the entire night, but they do not involve tickling. Well, not too much."

"Stop it, I will not blush any more," Mary declared, despite the blush flaming on her face. Suddenly serious she said, "Please, Lucas. Stay in bed and let me care for you? You have not fully recovered and you have done too much today. I will make us a meal of bread and cheese and I will start a soup for later. It will only take a few moments."

He shook his head stubbornly but relented, "As my lady requires, so shall I do." In truth, it felt good to rest. His strength was not fully returned yet, although he felt much stronger than he had expected to. More proof of Mary's skill as a healer.

He was thinking all these things as she went into the main room. To his surprise, when she returned carrying a tray with bread, cheese and tea for them, real tea not one of the medicinal brews, he had fallen asleep. They shared the food under the warmth of her blankets, then lay together again with her head on his chest.

She stroked his stomach for a time and they lay without talking, listening to the wind beginning to gust outside.

"Do you feel the air? I think we may have snow before morning."

"Yes, it will be much colder at least. I should see to Ironhoof. Do you have a blanket I can put over him?"

"No need, the other side of the cottage is a store room with an outside door. It has a dirt floor and it should be big enough to serve as a stable for him. Would that be good enough?"

It served adequately. Mary insisted that Lucas stay in the bed and let her get the horse situated, but Lucas ignored her. He managed to get himself dressed and Mary lay under the blankets and enjoyed looking at him.

"You are a very beautiful man," she said softly and he leaned over to kiss her lovingly.

The wind was certainly picking up, and Lucas could smell the icy tang that preceded snow. The door to the store room was small, but the room itself was wide enough for Ironhoof to turn without difficulty.

The big horse nudged him as Lucas brought in his saddle and other gear.

"I think you will be comfortable enough in here, old man."

The nudge was more pointed this time, as though it was a question.

"What? You want me to say it? Yes, you were right, she is a wonderful girl. I never claimed she was not, so there is no need for you to be smug."

Ironhoof threw his mane.

"I know, I cannot stay forever. I am sure she knows that but I will make certain she understands what it means."

With surprising delicacy the horse took a bit of Lucas' shirt in his teeth and tugged.

"Well, of course she could come with us. I would like that very much."

Ironhoof tugged again.

"Yes, I will tell her. Goddess knows, the Citadel always needs healers, she would be welcome there. With her skill I have no doubt she could be chief healer if she wished to be. But it has to be her choice, you know that."

The horse snorted in disgust. "Stop it, I cannot just grab her up and ride off with her, she has responsibilities here. She understands that even if you do not, old man. Now, I will fetch you a bucket of water and some oats. Try to remember that we are guests here and do not make a mess. I will check on you later."

Ironhoof nickered softly and Lucas gave him a good scratching under the jaw.

There was perhaps a foot of snow on the ground the next morning. Lucas and Mary worked together doing the chores that were needed, building up the fire in the hearth, seeing to Ironhoof's needs, Mary changed Lucas' bandage and checked the condition of his wound, which was dry and beginning to heel nicely. There was not much to do since they had both adequate food and firewood. So Lucas rolled in the tub and they heated water so he could get a proper bath.

As he soaked Mary used his razor to shave him, a skill she had learned from her father. It was a delightful feeling to lay in the hot water with his head back on the rim of the tub and his feet dangling out of the other side and see her serious face so close. He raised his hand time and again to touch her gently which always elicited a soft smile. Her smile made her plain face shine with beauty, and Lucas reveled in the fact that the smile was for him.

Once she had rinsed his face clean, Mary pressed her cheek against his and declared that he was perfect. Teasingly he tried to pull her into the tub with him and they played for a few minutes, with Lucas grinning and Mary's face serious but her eyes shining with happiness.

After, they laboriously emptied the tub one bucket at a time then rolled it back outside. While Lucas was checking on Ironhoof Mary made a warm nest of blankets for them in front of the fire, and that is where they spent most of the rest of the day, with many kisses, soft touches, much gentle love-making and sighs of contentment.

The next day was clear but blisteringly cold and the two spent it in much the same way, mainly just enjoying each other as they wished.

Late afternoon Lucas brought up the subject he had been dreading.

"Mary, my sweet, you know I cannot stay indefinitely, yes? No matter how much I might wish to."

"Yes, darling man, I know. I have always known, I simply did not wish to think on it yet."

Lucas pulled the blankets around her more tightly and she clutched him hard.

"Is it sinful to say that I would keep you here with me forever, if I could?"

"No, of course it is not sinful to wish it, nor to say it. But my going does not mean I would leave you, Mary. You could go with me if you wished."

"Back to the Citadel?"

"Yes, we always have need of a healer, there are never enough there."

Mary was silent and sad for a long time.

"No, I could not do that. My duty is here, there are many people here who depend on me. I must stay."

"I understand, your duty is to stay and mine is to go. I suspected you might see it that way, but I wanted to offer you the choice because you are dear to me."

"Would you ever come back?"

"I do not know. A paladin never knows when and where he might be called to go. But Mary, I would never ask for you to sit by the fire and wait for me. I could not ever expect that of you. To stop by for a few days every few years? No, that would be cruel, and I could not do it. You need someone who could be with you always, someone who could care for you and love you as you deserve."

"Lucas, you are a silly silly man. Of course I would wait, and I would take whatever time we had and it would be a joy. I might wish for more, I might cry when you left, but that would not last and I would welcome you whenever you returned. I would welcome you into my home, into my bed and into my body. There could never be another man for me. What other man would want to look at this ugly face every day. No, do not interrupt, let me say this. I know what I see in the mirror is not what you see when you look at me. I have seen how your face shines when you look at me. I know you see more than what others see. You see beauty where no one ever has before. You make me feel beautiful even if I am not. There could never be another man who made me feel the way you do. Never. You are my world, my darling Lucas. You are everything."

"As you are mine, my sweet Mary."

She lay with her head on his chest, content for now and with dry eyes.

"When must you go?"

Lucas sighed. "A few days, I think, when I am stronger and before the winter truly starts."

"And until you go, you will love me over and over, yes? You will love me with your beautiful body?"

"Yes, my lady."

Another brief bout of snow delayed Lucas' departure by a week, but on a bright, almost warm morning he and Mary stood outside the small cottage and looked longingly into each other's eyes.

There was nothing left to say, nothing left to do. They had loved each other passionately again and again. There had been tears and promises and soft words, but no recrimination and no anger. They understood need and they understood duty. It was enough.

Lucas swung up into the saddle, Mary slipped her hand around his leg and for a moment pressed her cheek against his booted foot. Lucas reached down and stroked her hair softly. He should say good bye, he should tell her how much she meant to him. There was so much he should have said.

Mary sighed softly, but could not find any regret in herself. Lucas was amazing in every way. She knew that he loved her as deeply and completely as she loved him.

She released his leg and Lucas nudged Ironhoof with his heels. The horse seemed as reluctant as the two humans, but soon stepped off for the road.

As they turned west a man leading a laden donkey came up from the other direction and walked toward Mary. She watched him approach curiously. He was young, perhaps younger than she was, and handsome, with blonde hair and pale skin. She smiled to herself, knowing that from now on every man she saw would be compared to Lucas and lose in the comparison.

The man gave a friendly smile as he approached and raised a hand to his chest in a gesture Mary recognized.

"Healer Mary? My name is Healer Justin. I am an itinerant healer and some people in the village mentioned that you might be willing to provide me with lodging for a few days? Of course, I would not dream of inconveniencing you."

Justin's cloak was thin, dirty and threadbare, his shoes were muddy and worn. She was almost certain there would be holes in the soles. His tunic had a rip along the side and was frayed at the hem.

Mary looked at him, able to read his story in the tattered nature of his clothing. A healer, yes, but without a permanent home, so he traveled from place to place looking for those in need of his arts and moving on. It certainly explained his tired eyes.

"Mary, my darling daughter, why are you waiting," said a voice in her mind. "You want to go with Lucas, you love him so much and he loves you. You do not need to stay, this man will take your place in an instant. Stop being a fool and scream for Lucas before he gets away." Oddly it did not sound like Metta

Mary, pushed down her normal doubts, pushed aside the fear, clenched her fists and said, "A few days, Healer Justin? I can do much better than that."

Ironhoof snorted and danced sideways as they went down the road.

"Will you stop it," Justin said, "You know I cannot stay, and you know she cannot leave. What was I supposed to do? "

Ironhoof threw his mane in protest and bucked lightly a few times.

"Yes, I know, you are determined to make this ride as uncomfortable as possible. Well that will not change anything, will it. She will still be there and I will not. So leave off, old man."

"LUUUUCASSSSSS!"

Ironhoof stopped before Lucas could rein him in, and was turning before Lucas even realized what he had heard.

"LUUUUCASSSSSS!"

"What are you waiting for? Go, go go." Lucas urged the big horse on, but it was not needed. Ironhoof had gone from moving slowly west to galloping east as fast as he could go, all without his rider's direction. Clods of mud and ice flew from the big hooves. The horse turned off the road without guidance and came to an abrupt stop in front of the tiny cottage.