All Comments on 'The Proposal Ch. 03'

This series continues to enthral me. The characters are real and likeable. The plot is a good one. The loving is romantic and sexy. Yeah, I am enjoying this series.

Excellent, once again. I could quibble about word errors and such, but the basic content of your writing is absolutely wonderful. You should launch into a professional writing career.

-- KVK

I'm eagerly waiting for CH 04

sorry to disagree, but i don't like how amber has transformed into a charlie's angel superhero ... now she's wearing the pants, taking charge, sassy and bratty, dominating her man and anyone who comes in contact with him, while he's turned into a total wimp mesmerized by her sex games and being called daddy. is this what men want? ugh ...

I disagree with the previous comment. Jonathon is letting his true nature out rather than the steely outer crust that he shows to the world.

Amber is proving to be a strong and accomplished person and together they do something wonderful for each other, the whole being greater than the sum of the parts.

Loving some one and being tender is not being a wimp, being a strong intelligent woman with ambitions is not unfeminine or dominating.

This story is tender and romantic with godd characters. I am getting immense enjoyment from it

is a short word with a large affect on emotion - you emote it with your style in this story. I can't imagine anything much better.

But you know they are right - an editor would help you make it easier on yourself and improve the products readibility.

Run em - Thanks - with High Regard

I give up. You have an other '5' to add to your collection of stories. You've created great characters, you've put words in their mouths that a Hollywood script writer would be proud of, and you've invented a story to put them in that makes the reader want more.

That being said I was tempted to give a '3' If you don't start puttinn in break marks (ie ***** or ------ between the segments in the story I swear I will.

I'm sure you've seen movies. Do what they do. Create a scene, cut film and splice it together so we can see different faces, different angles, etc. etc, but for God's sake do a little fade out/fade in when the scene is through and ready to skip time, skip location or add new character that were'nt in the last scene!

Some of your readers complain about this or that aspect of one character or another. I have the feeling that as is the case in many good authors, the characters develop as they will; the function of the author is to tell about them.

So what do I have to add? The English language is a beautiful, powerful tool. You need to sharpen up your abilities with it, to tell the great stories you have in you to tell.

Once again I love this story and read it over and over again. I want more!

Romantic and fun. It would be even better with longer, detailed sex scenes.