All Comments on 'The Retrieval... Ch. 03'

Only thing I would have changed was to also bring up what happens between Jules and Leah in the epilogue other than that I loved it.

I was so happy to see number 3 was up - not disappointed in the least! You took it in a totally different direction than I expected, but I really like it! Seems like you put a bow on this one. Any chance we'll see these two agsin?

Excellently written. I would've love to know what happened between Leah and Jules, other than that, Me likey. Thanks for sharing. A great fictional outcome.

Thank you again, I feel like there neeeds to be more about Jules and Lean, please encore!

A wonderful final chapter! Please think of writing more about these two... Or another thriller... Love it!

Thank you.

L

I wished I knew what happened with Jules and Leah...but I loved that Leah got revenge on Mr Smith.

What a great third part. Love that Mr. Smith got his in the end. I disagree about it needing more detail about Jules and Leah. The way I see it is Jules went into Witness Program with her, right? I like to think they are starting their lives together.

But it also seems you left it open ended for possible continuation? (hint hiint)

Well done! 5 stars!

Holy shit that was awesome!

When one plays with fire, one should expect to be burnt occasionally.

When one plays with fire in propane storage yard, one should hope to only get burnt.

Mr Smith was not very bright and should probably have realised sooner that his days would be numbered the moment... How did he put it?... He was, due to current circumstances, no longer of use to them. No honour among crooks I guess.

I'd kind of have liked to hear but about our heroines, they're a fun pair for sure, but this way we get to imagine that they all lived happily ever after and had lots of sexy time in their nice house in the middle of nowhere.

I fully expect this final chapter to further extend the author's present domination of the top slots of the hall of fame... Can't wait to see what you come up with next.

Super-sonic-uber-licious-stupendous story!!! There aren't enough adjective to describe how wonderful I think this series is. So as you can see, I made up my own:) Part 3 had a lot of unexpected twists and turns, including the sex scene. The entire story was action packed and high drama from beginning to end. loverofFun, I'm sad to see it end but I understand why - "always leave 'em wanting more." I wish you happy writing and I look forward to reading your work in the future

This is great... Probably the best plot I've read on this site. More stories like this please.

Thoroughly engrossing.

I really like your style.

I fell in love with the characters, and I'm going to miss them. Beautiful job!

The action,love and duty never cease `till the end.(cinder)

Surely the unique set of skills Leah possesses CANNOT go to waste. I mean, is going to work in Walmart? Sell insurance? Both are such fun characters, I never wanted your wonderfl story to end.

This was beyond great, from start to finish! And there are lots of leftover detail threads to explore. Such as, why was Jules such a damaged woman herself? There were two women here who had so much damage done them that you could easily build a whole new story, with thrills and chills and lovely fun stuff galore!

MORE! MORE!

I have to say, this is one of the best stories I have read in a very long time. I am going to add you to my Favorites, and hopefully keep up with your stories in the future.

I was awe inspired by your depth into which you got into your charters. Your story line was riveting, and kept me on edge with each twist and turn. The love scenes, again were totally awesome. Thank goodness my chair is leather, it's easy to clean up.

Please keep writing... You have a talent that needs an outlet, and I for one want to read more of your writings.

What a dirty little world intelligence is. Here in the UK, those of us who have been in the military or law enforcement call people like this "The Funny Buggers" (and we don't mean "Funny Ha-Ha"). Every word of this fictional story rang true---all in all an enjoyable thriller. I can see a potential series here. Think about it, Fun Lover, your writing is too good to waste.

It felt like I was reading a lesbian version of Jason Bourne - well, sort of, you know, since Bourne was an amnesiac assassin, but still... same flavor and style and overall feel.

I must say it was a satisfying read, although Jules' personality at first rubbed me the wrong way - the borderline-alcoholic-I-don't-care-who-I-affect nonsense - but you somehow made Jules transform into a lovable and adorable character, while still sticking somewhat to her origin, so to speak. This is a hard feat to accomplish in as short a story as this, especially where you've developed other characters as well.

Anyway, thanks for sharing, and I truly enjoyed it!

Rex

PS. I'm sure others have probably suggested it, but this story has so many "open ends" that could possibly become entire stories on their own. For instance - there could be a prequel about the origins of the main actors - Jules, Leah, Rack, Hank, and even Mr. Smith and this Council group. All of those threads could open up additional content. Secondly, I did see someone suggest/demand that Leah's skill-set be utilized in a sequel. Now, I personally believe you tied everything up beautifully, and that a sequel would probably take away from the satisfaction of this entity. However, it could be considered that Jules was an analyst - did she ever get her old job back, or was she still on assignment to the Retrieval team? If so, maybe Leah helps "train" Jules, or goes as backup on other jobs. (Seriously, I probably missed the part where you already explained this - if so, I'm sorry, hehe)

But I fully support and hope you strongly consider the option of exploring the three main characters, Jules, Leah, and Rack, before they all met, and as they began their journey that set them in motion to fatefully encounter each other. Travis Rackley seems like such an intriguing and interesting character, similar to Domingo Chavez in Rainbow Six and other Clancy novels.

Just my thoughts. :D

Absolutely love this series!

EXCELLENT !!

Best story ever on Literotica

Thank you for this very enjoyable story. What a wonderful blend of action, love, suspense and all around skull-dugery. The pace was of the story line allowed the reader to catch their breath. The way you enducated the reader with the hearings and such enlightened the reader was wonderful and kept them engaged.

There are those within our government who are "WILL DO as opposed to the Can do!"

Defending a nation is not easy. Defending a liberal and progressive thinking nation is why we do what we do. Thank you for your story, and a trip down memory lane.

I enjoyed most of the story quite a bit, but the final scene seemed quite abrupt and not in keeping with the rest. I feel it needs at least one more scene with both Leah and Jules, possibly with Hank as well. And of course another sexual encounter, with some resolution of the initial alcoholism trouble Jules was suffering, would be most welcome.

You've left plenty of loose ends to craft into another episode, IMHO, and I think there are many who would appreciate it. For example, Jules could be in a new position similar in nature to her previous one under her new identity, and targeted for sexual harassment either by a man or a woman, and Leah intervening. Or possibly Leah could somehow encounter the truck driver she "put down" and be recognized.

Thanks again, and keep up the good work!

All 3 chapters were excellent.

This author has all the tools to be a published author. The three chapters held my attention throughout and the story line was a real "page turner". Excellent job.

I hope to see you published for a much wider audience. Make it soon please!B833

The Retrieval is so beautifully written.

You just can't stop here there has to be more.

I can't even put to words how much I love this whole story from Chapter 1 til now.

Please with a cherry on top consider writing Chapter 4. But keep in mind if Chapter 4 is just as good we'd want a Chapter 5 and on. ;)

-Shay

I couldn't stop reading!! Love your stories!! Has a good story lines! The characters have a connection!

I read this story before and thought it was brilliant then, and I have just read all 3 chapters back to back - love it

Read all three chapters back to back you did an excellent job with it.

Like many others, I read all three chapters back to back. I was so emotionally invested in Leah and Jules' story. You've crafted such three dimensional characters––flawed but redeeming and so easy to root for; sexy as hell but not gratuitously so, and with such emotional depth.

Leah and Jules are just starting a new life together––there is so much story in that. Write more, write more, write more.

I love your writing. so much effort. fell in love with the story...

Brilliant!!!!!!!

Love your writing and your characters.

Please consider "THE FURTHER ADVENTURES OF LEAH & JULES "

as others have said there are a few loose ends we all would love to have wrapped up.

Nice!!! Its seems a part 4 needs to be made... as Chapter 3 tackles Leah's side of the story... how abt Jules... perhaps chapter 4 can tackle this and cover lose ends... of course I jst want for thier story to continue.

Really wish there was a 4th

Please!!!!!!!

I loved it!!!!! Please write more about these two ladies.

I really dig the way you concluded your story. 1 very satisfied reader. Let's add another🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹 dozen roses + 5🌟's

Lesbian spy fiction... There's so many easy ways for that premise to fall into cliché plots, unrealistic lunacy or cheesy smut, and you dodged them all to deliver a polished, satisfying, believable GEM of a series! This is probably my favorite story ever, and I'm a BIG reader for whatever that's worth. I can't give you enough stars! 1,753 stars! 427,850,629 stars!

I totally loved this story, from start to finish! Thank you for sharing it with us!

DEFINITELY MOOOOORE

Most Excellent! Please come back and give us more Leah & Jules!

What a great story, and I loved your writing style. In particular, you crafted the flashback scenes far better than I'm used to reading.

Thank you. I look forward to reading more of your work.

Please add the next instalment. You have left us hanging on a captivating novel

This entire story is the best I have read on this whole site , please give us more of the same.

Definitely more than a five star story!!!! I have been reading stories on this site for several years now and I have to say this is my absolute favorite!!!!🤩. I personally would love to see you continue this story..how did their life in the program go, how does Leah try to live a normal life etc.

Your writing style is phenomenal

Glad to see Mr. Smith got what he deserved. I hope Leah and Jules were ultimately able to find happiness and tenderness in the tough world that was part of their lives. They are both strong women who weren't portrayed as defenseless victims, characters which we need more in fiction and entertainment.

You do realise you have just written what would be a massive Hollywood blockbuster, don't you??

All right the erotic scenes would have to be severely cut down, but with an 18 certificate, it wouldn`t all have to be cut.

It would DEFINITELY work as an action adventure film.

OUTSTANDING as both a piece of adventure and eroticism!!!!

Wonderful.

Thanks for sharing your talents with us. A great tale well told.

I have read it some time ago, but I stumbled upon it again and again I loved it. Pantagruelic sex scenes e addictive intimacy . Also it seemed quite good the plot, just like some movies. Please write more

Thanks

Love the story!

Fantastic - captivating, erotic, tense. More stories.

This was an excellent three parter!

Absolutely fantastic story. The sex didn't overpower the plot. The quality of the writing is good enough for commercial publication.

Good show. I hope to see more from you.

Shame the author seems to have stopped writing here. An excellent story with a great ending but also the possibilities of taking it so much further and in a number of differing directions. 5 stars.

Just re-read this story and found it as riveting as before. Complex characters and a well-crafted plot. I don’t pretend to know how plausible any of the plot points are, but they seemed all of a piece. Thanks for sharing it!

Fun to see some Jane Bond action mixed with lesbian romance.

Sylvain

THE STORY WAS GREAT IT HAD JUST THE RIGHT AMOUNT OF SEX AND ACTION,.

HOPE TO SEE AGAIN.

Amazing! I could not put it down. I loved the suspense especially at the end. 5 stars!

This was a riveting read I loved the hell out of it. Definitely enjoyed the Bourne vibe but with women so freaking happy to have read this.

Not the first time I've read this. Enjoyed it just as much as I did the first time through. Please keep writing.

gosh, gimme more

That was fantastic. A fabulous story from start to finish.

Such a fantastic story of danger and loyalty and love.

Such great endings.

And thank you for not decreasing the intensity of either ending by trying to carry on their story.

It's our job now to think about their future, whatever future we want them to have.

Talk about giving someone paranoia.

Wow great story, now we need leah to take out the council and the secretary for atwell

Really good story and so different to the majority! Are there more chapters coming, please?

This was so much more than the typical Literotica story. Thank you so much.

Brilliant!

Part 4 please!!!!!.

Twowayman62

I've loved this story for years. I come back every so often to read it. Thank you for it. It really is great.

You are, by far, one of THE BEST storytellers I've had the pleasure of experiencing here.

Your characters are so well fleshed out, the dramatic interplay and even the light-hearted

moments give your stories such depth and personality.

Thank you for sharing your storytelling passion/talent with us.

So sad to see so many years have passed since your last submission.

P.S. LOVE the Calvin & Hobbes avatar!

I love to read spy thrillers. I love to read underdogs-exacts-revenge stories. And I love lesbian romance stories. This series, The Retrieval, has them all.

Terrific! Thanks!!

Every story a work of art, and this one surpasses all of them.